How long are you willing to wait?

@kissie34 (2294)
Philippines
September 15, 2009 1:48am CST
Does waiting for someone you love is worthy? How long are you willing to wait for him? Its been more than a year already when were in a long distance relationship. Just 2 months ago he came here in my place for a visit but he didn’t stay here for good. After 3 weeks he went back home. Well, I already knew that he doesn’t like to stay in the city where I’m living. I knew that he doesn’t like to leave me either but both of us as of now don’t have a choice. When he left I thought I can still live the same way I am before since we already got separated for more than a year and it will be so easy for me to live without him again. However, my life now isn’t the same like before. I always miss him and hoping that the right time will come for us to be together again. Honestly, I sometimes felt tired of waiting for him. Almost everyday, I always wish that the time would move fast so that I won’t miss him so much. Of course, I’m still willing to wait another year for us to meet again. I won’t give up ‘cause I know that this is another challenge in our relationship. How about your guy does these things happen to you before or as of the moment? How do you handle this kind of situation? Do you feel tired also of waiting for someone you love? Share something here please…
2 people like this
18 responses
• Philippines
15 Sep 09
i used to wait for someone before and its not just a year but a decade and i would say that my time was only wasted waiting for him. then i meet someone right now, just for a few months and we get a long together and seems that this one will work, i can see his sincerity. its not about the years of being together but the bomd the two of you made for each other. and how both of you managed to give time to each other.
2 people like this
@kissie34 (2294)
• Philippines
16 Sep 09
Well, it only means that the guy is not meant for you.. I just hope that the guy you met now is the one you will be spending for the rest of your life.. Wish you all the best.. As for me, I don't think so that I'll be waisting my time in waiting for him 'cause I know that we will be together. We just need to suffer and sacrifice for couple of months or years.. For as long as we have faith in our relationship and love I know that we will be together someday. And besides we always communicate with each other all the time so I should not be worried that I might be waisting my time in waiting for him.. Thanks for sharing..
@kevchua (1004)
• Malaysia
15 Sep 09
Sometimes it pays to wait, sometimes it doesn't. It's always best to convey your true desire to settle down (get married) to your boyfriend so that he knows what is on your mind, but be prepared he might not be ready yet due to financial constraints and so on. The question now is how long can YOU wait? I've friends who knew each other for 5 years, some 7 years, one of them 10 years before they finally got married. See? Duration doesn't really matter as long as both are COMMITTED to each other. If you really love him and he really loves you, then wait but if you can't wait anymore because your biological clock is ticking, and you want to start a family soon, then it is your right to leave him for another man. Your boyfriend cannot hold you hostage forever. That's my point of view, and i hope it has helped. Good luck
2 people like this
@kissie34 (2294)
• Philippines
16 Sep 09
Honestly, I don't like to get married and have a children yet. I like the way being single and I also know that he is not yet ready for a marriage life like me. We are very young to engage our selves into marriage. We were together for more than 3 years plus almost 2 years in long distance relationship. I don't like to find another man because I'm already contented with my boyfriend and somehow in our relationship. I believe that I can't find another man like him which is so perfect to me. Maybe, I just really miss him so much.. Anyways, thanks for the advise..
@prinzcy (32322)
• Malaysia
15 Sep 09
If he still in touch and I know he really mean what he said, then I am willing to wait for him to come back. Love doesn't mean he's besides me all the time. Long distance is painful but it will work if both parties really faithful for each other. But ff he keep losing contact and we can sense something definitely is wrong, it's best that forget about him and move on. We woman have great intuition, especially regarding someone that we care. We can see whether we can wait or let him go.
1 person likes this
@kissie34 (2294)
• Philippines
16 Sep 09
In our case, we always communicate with each other so I know that I'm not waisting my time waiting for him. I know that he is faithful and won't do anything that might hurt me. I trust him.. Well, experiencing more than a year in a long distance relationship I know that we can still handle it. Its just that I miss him so much. Hayz! Anyway, thanks for sharing..
@LdeL0318 (6402)
• Philippines
15 Sep 09
I understand how you feel. Just recently I posted a discussion with a bit similar topic. I am also in a long distance relationship. I'm afraid both of us is becoming tired of the situation already. We love each other and we still do up to now. But it will still take time before we can be together. We both knew from the start that this will not be easy for us. But despite that we still continue with the relationship. The first six months of the relationship is good but as we continue with it we encounter lots of problem. We sometimes talk about parting ways just to end all the hardships. But what can we do, we really love each other. We cannot afford to lose each other so we just have to sacrifice a bit more. This wouldn't lasts forever since we know that time will come for us to be together. And if that happened, surely it was going to be the happiest moment of our lives. I guess the best reward for all our sacrifices. So don't lose hope. If you really love him no distance can separate your love for each other.
@kissie34 (2294)
• Philippines
17 Sep 09
I'm happy to here your story.. Same as you we both love each other even though our situation is very difficult as of the moment. But even though we encounter some problems along the way, we never open up to end our relationship because we know that breaking up is not the best solution in our problems, the more we feel the pain. We both know that we will be together with each other someday, we just need to follow our plans. Everything will be fine, I hope so... Thanks for sharing your experienced to me..
@BStuff (495)
• United States
15 Sep 09
I dated a guy for two years while he lived near me and SIX while he didnt. It was the roughest thing on us and after the visits it would get really really bad for about a month then it would go back to easy. You would get use to it. We didnt live far enough that we couldnt visit a every other month or so. If the gap is less than 3 or 4 hours you guys should visit more often. We would talk every day for hours on line or on the phone. We would have date nights where we would watch the same movie or play the same game together. It was fantastic. Unfortuneatly a point came where we realized things wouldnt be changing anytime soon and we have to decided how true our love was if neither of us after years would be willing to change our dreams and relocate for the other. It was a great run while it lasted
1 person likes this
@kissie34 (2294)
• Philippines
24 Sep 09
Long distance relationship is really difficult and scary but I guess this also gives a good result after all. This kind of situation is really challenging and because of this we able to know how much we love and trust our partner. We sometimes think scary things like he/she might have another man/woman or she/he doesn't love us anymore, what ever it is, still we were trying to hold on and keep all of our promises. We will hold tight even we only have a few hopes that it will still work. Anyway, thanks for sharing your story to us.. Have a nice day!
@fabbie (3)
15 Sep 09
I went out with my ex boyfriend for four years and we were in a long distant just like how you described yours.I found it very hard ,i missed him all the times and the sight of any love birds always brought painful memories of us. There were times i got feed up and decided to find someone else but i never got to that because of the love i had for him .Anyway i later found out that he was seeing someone else and i was busy missing him and been faithful to him. So my advice to you is that i think its best you try to find a way to be together ,it either you move and stay with him or he cames to live with you because you might both face some temptation that could lead to your breakup. Its up to you ,i wish you all the best.
@kissie34 (2294)
• Philippines
13 Jan 10
Hi fabbie. Thanks for the advice. Well, just last month December 19, 2009 I went for a vacation to him and stayed there for 10 days. I also spend my Christmas with him and it was so fun. While staying there, I always wish to stay and never leave again. However, thinking abut my job and responsibility to my parents and siblings it come to a decision that this isn't the right time to be with him. I need to finished all the things that I need to do before I commit my whole self to him. Well, we both love each other and I believe with our relationship will last. And I think that is enough for us to continue our relationship in a long distance temporarily. Happy mylotter..
@smileonstar (4007)
• United States
15 Sep 09
Hello, I never get tired of waiting for someone I love. MY husband and I were also in long distance relationship. I missed him very much and as you know I couldn't live where he lived cuz I had school in the state and plus I had a job here as well. So, only once a year or twice a year that I had a chance to meet him in person. Mostly I met him through phone, email and chat... it was so hard for both of us... but we never gave up cuz we love each other very much. So, I tried to find a way to bring him here in the state and now here we are... we are married now and also never give up on each other too. I know both of you will have the same resolve like us... all you have to do is keep up and always understand each other... Nothing important than loving and understanding... If he can't stay where you live, then you can come to where he lives right? just try to find the way... If you both are serious to get marry then I am sure, no matter where you live you can stay together.
@kissie34 (2294)
• Philippines
20 Nov 09
Wow, its so nice to know your story. I also hope that we can be that strong as you and your husband. Well, even though we're in a long distance relationship we have somehow time for each other for communications like calls, chatting and webcam. Actually, I'm planning to move where he living so that we can be together. However, I need to finish some things to my family and to my job before going there so that everything will be fine. Anyway, thanks for sharing..
@tlb0822 (1410)
• United States
15 Sep 09
Long distance relationships are always hard. I would talk to him about how you feel, and see if there is a way for you two to see each other more often. Maybe every couple months or something. Just taking turns buying plane tickets, or driving that way you aren't apart for too long. I defiantly couldn't handle a long distnace relationship. My husband in I haven't been apart in our entire relationship for more then a week. And that is when we first met. Is there a specific reason why you two can't be together in the same city? Sometimes when you really love someone you need to make sacrifices to be together, on either end if you both made a little sacrifice in your life styles you may be able to be together. Best of luck.
@kissie34 (2294)
• Philippines
20 Nov 09
Yes, long distance relationship is very hard especially now that his already working. We don't talked as much as before this couple of months due to his working schedule. Well, the only reasons why we can't be together for now is because of our job. And besides we're not married yet so therefore we can't be always together unless we go for live in but of course my parents won't allowed that. I'm planning to visit him next month if he can fix his schedule for me. Our 5th Anniversary is coming very soon and I don't know if we can celebrate it together.It's our 2nd year celebrating our anniversary in a long distance relationship. I don't know if its still count. It's so nice to know that you always see your husband everyday and never got parted. I hope that if we get married in the future we will always be together. Anyway, thanks for sharing..
@Bluepatch (2476)
• Trinidad And Tobago
15 Sep 09
Waiting for a love is always quite a trial. You do need the person and everything is indefinite. So that's a personal decision and its a difficult decision. On the other hand, if you get the guy you want that's a kind of heaven, isn't it ? So, take your chances and see if it happens. If it doesn't then there's another or a lot more times you can try.
@kissie34 (2294)
• Philippines
24 Sep 09
I don't really mine waiting for him 'cause I know that we will be together someday. I believe that waiting is really a part of our life. We cannot always succeed our dreams in life without waiting and striving hard to achieve it. All I need to have is patient and understanding in our situation so that I won't be confused on how I feel. I know that this will end very soon.. Thanks for sharing..
• United States
16 Sep 09
To be honest with you, I would just have to say do what your heart tells you. It is hard to tell someone really what to do if they really truly love someone. I mean I would not want someone to tell me to leave my husband if him and I were away from each other for some odd reason, which is why I will not tell you that. So just follow your heart and things will work out the way they are meant to be.
@Hubfee (665)
• Thailand
19 Jan 10
I believe that staying stable is a proof of true love that people have inside. If you ever have had true love for him then you can wait forever. It sounds pathetic but since my father and my mother divorcement, 22 years, my mother still wait for my father that what I've seen. Although my father already had new family and a lot of men came to her life, to court her.....She said to me that she's not lonely because she has got me.....But I know from the deep inside she always have only my father. Anyway, I love my father. and I believe that he's a good man. That is also what my mother tells me always. And I know that he also loves my mother too and that's why I am appeared.
@ypyanyan (956)
• China
16 Sep 09
if he is worthy of my waiting .I will wait him .But I am a rational girl . Reality is different from our thought.
• Philippines
16 Sep 09
As they say "Everything worth having is worth wating for". If you rreally love the person,you have to wait for the right place at the right time, you have to wait for him. But, for a meanwhile find time for yourself dont stick with thinking of him too much.
• India
17 Sep 09
hii....the second name of life is waiting....i am waiting for love in whole life...when i found that thing which i scarching.....&....scarching.
@jules67 (2788)
• Philippines
16 Sep 09
Hi kissie34. I think you should talk to him heart to heart and get an answer right away. You should not wait on someone that long, for someone who can't decide. Life is too precious to waste on trivial matters. I do know that you still love him. But if you are hurting that much, you should think twice. You deserve better. You are only 21 and you have a full life ahead of you.
@jen14ed (865)
• Philippines
16 Sep 09
hi kissie34 is not easy to wait for someone you love.. i know Long distance relationship is not easy and is hard relationship because you did not see each other in person but we have a internet and cellphone and etc. but most important is see the person the one you love.. i know how you feel right now, i know the long distance relationship in not easy. why don't you ask him to go with him tell him that she love him and you like to live with him. tell to him that everyday is you miss her. tell to him that she love him so much.
@patofgold23 (5069)
• Philippines
16 Sep 09
hi kissie... I feel you... I have been waiting for the opportunity to get back with the person I love for 3 years now... like gambling,there is always a risk of getting hurt... I had a long distance realtionsip for 5 years in the past.. I was like you..always waiting... it does hurt... but guess what? we don't care when we love the person right? so I guess it is okay./.i truly believe love is woth waiting for... but only give what you can afford to lose.. save a little something for yourself..love yourself a little more... so if in the end you end up disappointed... the fall won't be that hard.
@Beye36 (9)
• China
15 Sep 09
forget it