What A Busy Day At My Parents Plus Some GREAT News!!

@CatsandDogs (13963)
United States
October 19, 2009 10:21pm CST
Gosh, it was a busy day! Hubby and I went to my parents to clean the outside of their house of spider webs and what not and to wash all of their curtains which needed it so bad! It had been two years since they've been taken down and washed, they sure needed it! Mom had told me that she and dad had cleaned the whole house Saturday and Sunday but were too tired to vacuum so I did that for them and cleaned out the fish tank. Hubby came in and mopped the floors and helped me put the curtains up. Whew! That's done, thank God! Now they need their porch railings painted but I'm going to talk to my parents tomorrow and see if that can be put off till the spring time. I think they'll be fine with that. The GREAT news is, mom finally found out what's causing her dizziness!! After suffering with it since April of '08, she finally knows!! She has an inner ear problem. Now I'm not sure exactly what that means because her doctor is on vacation. Get this crap, the nurse was suppose to call mom with the results of her test and she never did so mom called her and got the answering machine. Well, she got a little crafty and figured out a way to get in contact with someone, a person, a human being! And she did! She got the doctors daughter who is a nurse too and she told her that's what she had so mom asked what to do about it and she told her to just keep taking your valium. Mom couldn't believe what she was hearing! Come on!! After all this darn time and she's telling mom to just keep taking her valium?! Mom is so disgusted because she has to wait for the doctor to return on the 28th to find out what to do next. BUT the good news is, she finally has a name to her problem!! FINALLY!! We're all so ecstatic to finally put a name to her problem!! Yippeeee!! Anyway, mom and dad don't have the internet because all they can get is dial up and it's too much of a pain in the rear to even bother so she just did away with it. Well, I had bought some games for her to play because she loves to play games on her computer but since she doesn't have internet, I couldn't get them to unlock. Talking about frustration!! ARG!! Then I wanted to show her the girl on Oprah Winfrey show, Charice Pemengco singing A Note To God. I had downloaded it on a floppy and made darn sure it worked before taking it up there which it did. We get up there, the darned thing would not open!! Oh talking about frustration!! ARG!! Damn computers!! I wish I could understand the hows and whys of this and that but I don't. Hubby didn't know how to burn a CD so when I got home, I figured it out and burned it on a CD myself so the next time I go up to see them, I'll have it READY this time for mom and even dad to see if he wants to. I know mom will love the song. I just know she's going to love it! Well, my middle brother called, the one I'm not on speaking terms with, and I had to hurry to get the phone for mom and when I realized it was my brother, I answered with a "Hold on! I'm getting you to mom!" and handed mom the phone. Can you believe the butterball told mom that he would've said hello to me if I gave him the chance! He can kiss my tail until I get the apology that he's owed me for almost a year!! To hell with him and his nastiness until I get that apology and a sincere one at that and I mean it or he can keep going going. I will not be treated in such a manner EVER again by him or anybody else! I did not deserve it so therefore, I will not take it. Anyway, we got to talking and mom and dad both asked me what I wanted when they died. I was taken aback a bit but I know that they know that their time is near. No question about that so I told them that the only things that I want is my great grandmothers picture, dad's white horse picture (a horse dad had and adored so much and the horse adored him and I'm a white horse lover anyway) and mom's doll that she's had since she was a little girl and that's it. Dad spoke up and said that my oldest brother wants his backhoe, trailer and tools. My middle brother wants dad's truck because he needs a truck every now and then and mom's snow babies. I asked them a few questions on how to handle it and now that I know the answer, I have more and will ask them another time, I know what to do.... for the most part. UGH! What a conversation to have!! But I held on and carried on like it was any other conversation because I know their time is near, no doubt about that but to be honest, there's nothing that I want. I explained to mom "I don't mean it as if to say that her stuff isn't good enough for me, it's just that I don't need or want anything really and she was like, "Oh no no no I know that!" Well I had to be sure she understood my meaning. So needless to say, it was a full day. We got a lot done and they're in good shape, at least for now. To make this a discussion, have you ever had a full day like this?
6 people like this
9 responses
@Thoroughrob (11742)
• United States
20 Oct 09
I am glad you have found out something on your mom. Although I am not sure what they can do for it. It really is hard to have those conversations, isn't it. I am glad you did not let it get to you, because it does need to be said. My day was filled with phone calls trying to get my son's medication filled. It is getting to be such a headache with the insurance.
2 people like this
@Thoroughrob (11742)
• United States
21 Oct 09
He has been on it long enough that they want it done in a 90 day supply. It is only self stable for 7 days. On top of that he has Medicaid which will not do more than 30 days. The computer just keeps spitting it back out and rejecting. It is such a pain. It takes about 3 to 4 hours on the phone every other week to get it.
@CatsandDogs (13963)
• United States
21 Oct 09
I heard there's medicine for inner ear problem but I don't know what it is. I hope there's no therapy involved because mom is so fed up with that. She should've gotten therapy from the time she was diagnosed then she'd have gotten more back that she lost but since they started almost a month late, it's too late. She's gotten back all she's going to. Oh those conversations are so unappealing but we do need to have them. Really scary too. I hope you were able to get your son's medicine! Why is it that you're having a hard time? Insurance won't pay for it?
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
20 Oct 09
My, that is a big day, but it’s a great feeling when you accomplish all that you have set out to do. I had a busy day today clearing out cupboards and doing chores that needed doing for ages and I am now exhausted but satisfied. I’m glad your mum has an answer in regards to her dizziness, knowing is the first step to a solution. Things sound as though they may be looking up a little for you; I hope it all keeps going that way for you cats!
2 people like this
@CatsandDogs (13963)
• United States
21 Oct 09
Just like you, it's been busy around here! lol I bet you feel so much better with all those cabinets cleaned out. I need to do that especially with the winter coming up, I need to switch my summer clothes to winter again. Bla! I hate winter!! I hope you're right Paula, about things looking up for me. I really hope you're right but I'm not counting on it so I'll be ready for the next big bang.
1 person likes this
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
22 Oct 09
That's life I suppose, you never know what is coming up next...Think positive, cats.
@ElicBxn (63235)
• United States
20 Oct 09
oh yeah, but because of my feet and my fibro, I have to sit more than sometimes wish I had to I think my brother and sister know that I want the picture of the giraffe, and honestly that would be the main thing I want - mom took it in Kenya so its a special picture
1 person likes this
@ElicBxn (63235)
• United States
20 Oct 09
No, I didn't know you loved giraffes, I've loved them since my dad brought one back from a job interview - except I call them "trees" because some where along the line when I was little, they told me they ate trees. They even got me to eat broccoli because they said I only had to eat the "leaves" like a "tree". - and they got us to eat asparagus by calling them "vegetable lollipops" Now, I love horses - all horses, any old nag will do- like cats...
2 people like this
@CatsandDogs (13963)
• United States
20 Oct 09
That's a neat way to put it to a child. I called broccoli trees when I was a young gal and that's how I describe them to hubby because he can't remember which is which between vegetables unless he sees them but still gets the names of them confused. Men. lol But the memories of us kids in good times are so worth remembering! I never tried asparagus till about 10 years ago and fell head over heals in love with them!! I'm guessing they were too expensive back when I was living at home for my parents to buy but gosh, when I had my first, it certainly wasn't my last! lol I love horses too but am so afraid of them but the beauty of them in their own environment is just breath taking. However, the white ones are my favorite. Hi Hatley! You think so? LOL I've always thought about writing a book about my life and naming it "Number 3 of my life" because 3's are a nightmare for me. Who knows, you gave me a really neat idea!! Thanks!! You've built my confidence in it!! Thanks for your really kind words!!
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
20 Oct 09
catsanddogs hi again I just realized that from all your discussions your life would make a really fascinating book,you should write all your discussions into a novel as you are a wonderful writer. I enjoy your discussions so much. You make me see what is going on in your life.
2 people like this
@SomeCowgirl (32191)
• United States
20 Oct 09
You've got me out of breath with all that you have done! Wow! Just relax and take a breather. I hate conversations like the ones you had with your parents. It's a necessity, but it's a not a nice conversation to have at all. I would have started crying and I wouldn't be sure if I could stop crying. But it's good your strong! Now, I had a busy day... Oh I don't even remember one that busy, not in a long time... lol. I think the last busy day was when my husband and I got married, the day before we had to run from our county to another, then back to our county to go to the church, then back home, then back to the church, then back home...
1 person likes this
@CatsandDogs (13963)
• United States
20 Oct 09
LOL I'm a bit tired from doing all that and then having to come home and feed our furry gang and do the night time chores before sitting down or otherwise, I'd be down and none of it would've gotten done! lol I still need to get my shower and I will if I don't fall asleep in this chair in the meantime. Life has made me strong Cowgirl. I can honestly say that life made me unable to cry at the drop of the hat. I hate it though because my heart is so sensitive but yet, I can't cry. It's kind of like, I tune out. I'd much rather cry and get it out of my system than to hold it all in but it's the way I am and was told that it's because of my not so happy past. I hate it. Now about weddings, gee, this is my second marriage and going really strong for 18 years but when I got married the first time, it was a very simple Justice of the Peace wedding, nothing fancy at all but my second, I went all out but did it the right way which saved us a huge bundle of money but good grief! All the grief I got putting it all together, had I known it was like that, I'd have gotten married at the JP's again!! LOL That's just too darned much work! Especially when I made all the flower arrangements, invitations being sent out, and making sure everybody else got their dresses and tuxes, sheesh!! I know I'll never ever do it again!! Noooo way!! Besides, I got a great man this time around but if anything happens to him, I'm on my own baby!! LOL I ain't gettin married again!! LOL
1 person likes this
@SomeCowgirl (32191)
• United States
20 Oct 09
Well I hope by now that you have gotten relax! I meant to also mention that I am glad to hear that you now know what was wrong with your mother and her dizziness. Hopefully they can do something about it and quickly. I am sure that would be a nice present for christmas in and of itself. My MIL said she wished we would have gotten married by the justice of the peace after all that we had to do, she was helping us a great bit! We didn't want to get married by the justice of the peace though, it wouldn't be under god, atleast that's the way we felt... But we now know that it might have been easier, and besides god is everywhere...
1 person likes this
@CatsandDogs (13963)
• United States
21 Oct 09
Yeah, kind of sorta, had some rest. Been trying to catch up on things here at my house. You know how that goes, finish one thing and start another. A woman's job is never done. You've heard of that saying, haven't you? "A man's job is done with the sun but a woman's job is never done." It couldn't be more true.
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
20 Oct 09
I can not believe that silly nurse told your mom to keep taking her valium for an inner ers problem. what a dork. valium is not going to help that at all. I have been having problems for 3 weeks w/an inner ear problem. she will have to get a med for that. I hope she can get it soon & get better. How did she determine that's what her problem is. it will definiely affect your balance & i had roaring in my ears that was driving me nuts. I hope she gets something soon for it. as always u were the good helpful daughter. As always your good husband helped u. I just wish your parents would appreciate y'all like they should. hugs to u both.
1 person likes this
@CatsandDogs (13963)
• United States
21 Oct 09
Tell me about it Jo! Mom couldn't believe her ears when the nurse told her that! She's so aggravated with them all because the damned medical field isn't what it used to be! The doctors or nurses couldn't care less about their patients. All patients are these days is a dollar sign. The almighty dollar! It makes us all so sick. Get this, they can do the test but they can't treat her, they've referred her to an ENT doctor. Passing the buck yet again. I can't wait till they're up in age and retire and get treated the same way. What will they have to say then? They did a test on her to determine if it was inner ear. It was a horrible test for mom. What they did is put these binocular type of thing over her eyes and she was to do certain things. It lasted about 45 minutes and when it was done, the damned nurse told her it would make her very dizzy for the next 24 hours. OMG Jo! She was a mess for days!! It was awful! But at least mom knows now what her problem is and now treating it is the next thing but the sad part is, it took a year and a half to finally figure it out. I have more to tell about that day at mom and dad's. I'll tell about it after I get caught up here. It's about secrecy and mom, something I figured out that day but needed some time to get it into my head.
1 person likes this
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
21 Oct 09
That is ridiculous. I bet that test was not necessary to start with. all my dr. did was look in my ear & said i had fluid on it. U are right all they see is dollar signs. They will do every test they can think of if you will let them. i do hope this gets your mom staightened out. it's not a very pleasant thing to have but it can be controlled by meds.
1 person likes this
@bing28 (3795)
• Philippines
20 Oct 09
I'm happy for you, Cats, atleast things aseemed to be getting in place now. It's alright if you'll give a brother the chance to say hello to you, that's a good signal, seems asking apology from you will follow, much better if you'll be in speaking terms with one another while mom and dad can still see and appreciate it. Hope am not much interfering but just an opinion from a friend. Cheers, cats...
@CatsandDogs (13963)
• United States
20 Oct 09
I do not want anything to do with my brother until he comes off of his high horse and apologizes to me for his selfish behavior and hateful words towards myself and my husband. He's hurt me so many times over the years and I've kept my trap shut in order to keep the peace but not any more. If you could see the emails that went on between us, you'd see why I feel the way I do. He cut me deeply and he's not getting away with it this time. I don't wish him any harm or any bad luck but I do wish him good riddance. I'm legally deaf and he's legally blind and here I offered to give him one of my eyes so he could see and he does me like this? I don't think so! No pun intended bing, please understand that! But I can't have his "Holier than thou" attitude around me. He needs to get off his high horse and apologize, otherwise, he'll think he can continue to treat me like dirt. I know you mean well and all and I do appreciate that!! I really do but no, it's not going to happen until he sincerely apologizes. I'll tell you something else, as my parents and I were talking, we got to talking about my dad's aunt and how she can make a person feel an inch tall and then dad said that my aunt could do it too and then he slipped up and said my middle brother can do it too! I turned and looked at him and said, "Oh yes he can. I know that for a fact but it didn't work on me nor will it ever." Nothing was said about our incident because they know it's true. Besides that, they need to stand up for me when they know full well that hubby and I meant no harm but all the good for all concerned and that we were just trying to help, not hinder but my brother wanted to read it in a different way so by all means, he can and keep on with it because I'm not explaining myself to him again for him to ridicule me again. Isn't going to happen. Don't worry, I'm not upset with you!! I'm not!! You just don't know what all went down is all and that's ok. Just thought you'd like to know, ok? Cheers to you too my friend!
1 person likes this
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
21 Oct 09
Sweetie it is good to hear that you have had a full Day and a good one to I just hope that it stays that way for now, so that you can relax a bit Big Hugs to you Oh as for your Brother, wait for the Apology at the end of the Day it has been you and your Hubby that has been there all the time, bad good no matter what you 2 have dealt with a lot
1 person likes this
@CatsandDogs (13963)
• United States
21 Oct 09
Oh gabs, trust me, my brother won't get a second of my time until he apologizes! That's a promise! I feel this way, if he can dish it, he better be able to catch it because I'm not that "peace maker, keep quiet type" anymore. He's hurt me so many times over the years and it's about damned time it stopped. I'm not a little kid anymore and even if I were, I still didn't deserve the nastiness of his.
@dragon54u (31636)
• United States
20 Oct 09
I'm so glad your mom finally got her problem diagnosed! Didn't her doc leave someone on call that she can see to solve the inner ear stuff until he gets back? It's SOP to leave someone on call so patients aren't left with no one to see. Those conversations are hard to have but they're necessary. Like me, you only want something to remember them by because they are what's precious, not their possessions. At least you got it over with. I don't like to think about when my parents are gone but it will be soon, they're in their 80's and dad isn't in good health. You picked just the type of things that I would have!
1 person likes this
@CatsandDogs (13963)
• United States
21 Oct 09
Oh the damned medical field isn't what it used to be! The doctors or nurses couldn't care less about their patients. All patients are these days is a dollar sign. The almighty dollar! It makes me so sick. Get this, they can do the test but they can't treat her, they've referred her to an ENT doctor. Passing the buck yet again. I can't wait till they're up in age and retire and get treated the same way. What will they have to say then?
1 person likes this
@dragon54u (31636)
• United States
21 Oct 09
The way things are going, I'm pretty sure they'll tell your parents here, take this to manage the pain and accept these symptoms of old age. Now get out of here while we treat someone younger and more productive!
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
20 Oct 09
hi catsanddogs wow you and hubby did have a full day. I think your mom must be really proud to have a daughter like you. And that brother of yours that gives you a bad time. good for you,if he cannot apologize, thats his hard luck. I am glad your mom got it figured out what was causing her dizzyness, my hubby had that inner ear thing too. I know the doctor had put him on some medication for it, and it seemed to sort of cure the problem because after a while it all went away and he did not have to take the medication anymore. hope that happens with your mom too.As for me and a full day, that is a hard one to answer. some might think the life I live here is just great, my room is cleaned, my bed linens are changed several times a week, my bed is made for me, while I sit here and mylot most of the day. I mean I am just so not used to this pampering. I may be almost 83 but I did all my own housework until I had to come here. I cooked for myself, cleaned our apartment and also did mylot he he. now I feel sort of useless until I mylot. But I have had my share of full days when I worked at the library then came home and did the housework and all. maybe in a way I may deserve some of this pampering. I worked until I was 80.
@CatsandDogs (13963)
• United States
21 Oct 09
We're all so ecstatic to finally put a name or diagnosis on mom's problem!! A year and a half is a long time to be dizzy and yet, she kept getting the brush off. ARG!! Do you know the name of the medicine that was given to your husband? Mom is being referred to an ENT doctor. Passing the buck as they say. So irritating. As for you sweetie, you worked till you were 80 years old? WOW!! That's quite an accomplishment! You deserve all that pampering!! You did more than your share so enjoy all that pampering you're getting!!