Why do you think some women don't want to bear a child?

I have two wonderful children and wouldn't change a thing. However, my sister in laws are over 30 and they don't want a child, nor do they want anything to do with a child. They don't want the responsibility. Be happy that these women have faced the fact that they don't want children. Think of all the children that are abused and mistreated now and be thankful that these women didn't have children just to find they couldn't or didn't want to deal with being a mother. I can respect these women more for admitting they don't want kids than I can seeing mothers who don't deserve their children.

...Hi jerenah2022, There are a lot of women who think that motherhood is a choice. A woman does not get married just because she wants to bear children. You have the capacity to bear children, you don't necessarily have the mental thought that goes along with that capacity to want to procreate. Women who know themselves and know that it takes a world of giving, and selflessness, as you have found out I'm sure, to try to raise little ones who will grow into responsible adults. They know that they do not have that amount of altruism in their DNA and so they forfeit having children in their lives. Before you have a baby you have no idea, if you will be a good parent or not, some women don't want to take the chance to find out, so they too forfeit the opportunity to bear a child. Children are not cabbage patch dolls as you know, you have to get to know the child that you gave birth to, it is an amazing process, every woman does not have to want to go through that process. It's a choice, not a given that because you are a woman, then you must want to have children or you must bear a child. Women have enough love to give in other ways, that not having a child should not pose such a void in their life if they chose not to bear children. Those women like yourself who are good parents and mothers are to be commended for rearing children who will be productive members of society. Take care.

I know why some women don't want children. the desire isn't there. simple as that. it's the same as not wanting a dog, in my book. a friend of mine is about my age, just short of 30, and she has NEVER had a pet. not so much as a hamster. not even a goldfish. to me, a life without animals as companions is far too sterile and empty. she's missing out on something so wonderful. I can't imagine my life without dogs and rats. at the very least. and I've had ferrets, horses, a tarantula, rabbits, guinea pigs, cats, fish, hamsters. but mostly dogs and rats. and I can't imagine how empty a life without little animal souls must be. and yet some people, beleive it or not, actually enjoy life without animals. I mean, how can they. so I sort of understand how some people can't understand how I don't want children. but I don't. I don't really enjoy being around children for long, and I don't find them cute. I do find them funny, I'll give that much to them. they are funny, the things they say and do. I adore my neices and nephews, but I also sometimes find them intolerable. but when I do I can then leave them where they are and go home to my snuggly little ratlets. who curl up on my shoulder and have a snooze. and I only really find children interesting when they're old enough to hold conversation, and talk, and are rather like small people. I use several forms of contraception at once. and if I was ever to fall pregnant, I'd be devastated. but then I'd do the best I could for my child, because that's what mothers are supposed to do, and I'd do my best to give them a happy life, and I'm sure I'd love them. but if someone offered to sterilise me now, I'd go for it. I don't like children enough to put them before myself by choice. which is why I chose to avoid conception as much as I can. anyone that gets through my defences, the Gods want them to be here, and it's my duty to do my best by them. and how protective I am of my loved ones, I know I'd love and protect them. but by choice, I will never have children.

I have many friends who don't want children . . . and at this point, it may actually be too late for them to have children anyway (except to adopt). But here are some of the reasons I've heard from them. * Children are too much work. My cousin is an elementary school teacher - and although she loves kids, she says it's good to just have them during the day at work and then go home to NO kids - peace and quiet. * They (as parents) would not be responsible enough. My friend wants kids, but her husband does not because he does not think she would be a responsible mother. She is my friend, but I'd have to honestly think the same thing. The woman does not take good care of her own health, totally unorganized, etc . . . you might think she might forget to feed her own child! * A couple may like their freedom. Some see how their friends with kids are - and they don't want to feel trapped. They like to travel, spend their money on themselves and just don't want to deal with having to go on a child's schedule. * One of my friends said she never felt the "motherly need". She thinks perhaps because her own mother was not too motherly towards she and her sister - so she has never wanted children. * Another friend said she had a terrible childhood . . . so although she was married, she wanted to spend the rest of her life reliving her childhood to do the things she wasn't able to do as a kid. Her own mother called her selfish for doing that, but that's the way she felt. * On myLot, I actually met someone who said they did not want children because the whole laboring process sounded too painful!! But be careful. Some people DO want children, but are unable to have children . . . but they will tell people that they simply don't want to have children (it's easier and less hurtful to say that). My friend finally admitted she's told people they never wanted to have children, but fact was her husband had problems in that area. To say they didn't want children was less shameful to them. Well, some people just don't want children - and that's their choice. I am happy and feel privileged that I do have a child (with one on the way). I love being a mother and I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world!

Sounds like I'm one of those women. I am in my early 20s but even as I get older, I don't believe my thoughts would change. It's not that I don't like children per se but to me, I think bringing children to this world is a big responsibility and I would have to buckle down. I am career minded and I enjoy my freedom. I like to travel and do the things I do without worrying so much about having to feed someone, etc. I have my dogs and I'm not comparing them to children but pets are more than enough for me. I don't feel the need to have children just for the sake of having someone to take care of me as I age and I don't feel the need to have kids just because everyone else is.

Hi jerenah2022! I am also a mother and I love my kid so much too. I think some women are afraid to have a kid because of the following reasons: 1. Stretch marks 2. Gaining weight and losing weight will be hard. 3. Career talk 4. Not yet ready for a big responsibility 5. Financial reasons 6. Wanting to enjoy their time more, alone with their partner I guess... 7. Childhood traumas There are really lot of reasons why women are afraid to have a child but I know for some, time will come to the point of realization of the value and importance of having a kid. They will feel the emptiness and desire of having a baby of their own. It is really nice to me a mother! A wonderful feeling! Have a nice day jerenah2022!

I was a divorced mom, a working single mother and that responsibility is a lot for one person to raise children by themselves. I only had one child because I realized that my husband was constantly unfaithful and I knew that we would be divorced no matter how many times I tried to work it out. If the relationship between partners is not solid, it is also a reason for not bearing children. It is definitely not easy to do it alone. There are so many reasons why a woman may not want children, probably more than the reason to have children. It is a personal choice and I would rather have someone say openly that they do not want to be a mother than go ahead and have a child and ignore or mistreat it. There are way too many unwanted children in the world.

It's painful, it expensive, children can complicate things, it is a major responsibility. I am a woman who does not want children right now because I see other women having children and I think to myself that I am just not ready for that kind of responsibility yet. Also, I know women who have children that are special needs. Seeing that really makes me not want to have children, I don't want my child to suffer like that. There are many things that can turn women off when it comes to having children. I think that children are a lot to take care of.

I have a baby daughter, a toddler son and a teenage son. I love my children and wished to become a mother. I am glad that I was able to get pregnant. If I hadn't been able to I would have adopted. Childbirth is painful and some don't wish to suffer that pain. Some ladies are infertile and aren't able to get pregnant. Some other ladies like to have great careers and don't have time for children. A couple might like traveling and not wish to be tied down with children. I have heard of double income no kids type of people. I have also heard that a baby to age eighteen will cost thousand of pounds. Sometimes some health complaints can be go to the next generation of family.

I think they are afraid of having a painful pregnancy and fear the other side effects especially if they are trying to conceive at an older ages. It would be risky for their own health and to their baby. Some reasons are busy for their career growth and others need to have a sexy body maintaining a good image like those involves in modeling, celebrity or being a famous athletes superstar and so on. Another reasons even though they like to give birth they have no man at present to impregnated them...hence, it becomes a problem..

Hi Jerenah, Some women doesn't want to have a child because they're not ready to take on the responsibility attached to motherhood, they don't want kids-- no heart and patience for kids, wants their partner's full-attention and bearing a child will put her life in danger. I am a mother of two special kids-- with autism and i am proud to be their special mom. Not everyone is blessed to bear a child and i am lucky enough for having two special/precious kids!

Hello, jerenah. I am a mother too, and I have 2 year old son and I love being mother too. I just can imagine to live without my sweet little boy. I think the reason why some women do not want to bear a child is : to be a mother is really hard. Maybe they think: I am not ready yet, I can't take care about child, I can't get that responsibility an etc. Honestly, if somebody wait to became 'ready to do it' this time will never come... Mother is born when the child is born! When I was pregnant I thought :'I am not ready yet to be a mother.' I was afraid of all responsibility that I will take, after my child born. And I found that we are learning step by step how to take care and how to be a good mothers. Now I can't imagine to live without my kid and I love my days because of my child - OMG I found that I love him more than myself! I don't want to judge any one. Everyone decide when to 'create a generation'.

Hi, I could be from there family life and how they were raised. if they were abused or mother had psychological problems and runs in the family like mine I was not sure if I wanted children. My other suffered from manic depression, compulsive disorder, my youngest sister has Schizophrenia's, my youngest brother suffers from depression and my oldest sister has a mild form of Bi-polar So as you can see family life was not good when I growing up. I do not know what normal family life is. Someone was always in the hospital or someone was getting drunk like my mom and taking her pills which a lethal combination etc. I did decide to have two children so far they have none of this. But is does run in the family and skips a generation so there children could carry it or come down with it. I will not have anymore children I am in my 40 and raise my two daughter on my own. I am afraid that the next child will definitely have one of these problems. Very interesting question Have a great day Unique16

There are lots of reason. Some don't want because they biologically can't, some don't want or are hesitant for some personal reasons. I have a colleague who is hesitant to have children. She was a teacher and she had lots of sad and traumatic experiences with her students. Some can't say that they don't want because they are very satisfied and happy not having children. It really boils down to what will make someone happy, career, family, children. I won't take it against the woman if she doesn't want to bear children as we have the rights to our own lives and the woman should not be obligated to have children.

There are probably quite a few reasons as to why some women do not want to bear children or simply do not want to have any. For some, it might have to do with their health or something like that. Motherhood is a stage that is made for some women and not for others. Some women may not want to have to be responsible for their own children or something like that.

Some of my former female colleagues prefer not to bear a child. Some are afraid of losing the current post, which gives them self esteem and financial support. Others are hesitating to downgrade their living quality because of high cost of raising a child. They shift the responsibility to their brothers or sisters. Out of concern for their parents, most only child would think twice before deciding not to bear a child for ever. Quite some change their mind after staying rejective for more then five years. They finally experience the joy of parenting. Most parents would not interfere in the decision, but accept whatever their children make, in spite of the earnest wish to see their grandchildren.

Hi, Two month back my wife had give birth to beutiful baby girl. We are very very happy. first time in my life i was thought that i am richest person in wolrd. same with my wife.

There are many reasons, it might be financial she may feel that they can't afford a child, she may be in an abusive/controlling relationship and does not want to bring a child into it, she may want to focus on her career. There are too many reaons to list it's best to ask the person delicately why they made that choice but you have to accept that some women don't want to discuss it as it is a very personal choice, and probably not an easy one.

i think it might be like because they lose their beauty. Their body become shapeless , they want to be more responsible which might be a burden for them. They cannot enjoy going here and there and whereever they want to at whatever time. They will become committed to the life. Should feed them and not feeling free because always the thoughts of the baby will worry them.That's why i guess some women not prefer babies for some year

I think these women aren't ready to take such big responsibility yet.I am 20 years old and honestly speaking,I'm not even ready yet.But I do agree that being a mother is the most rewarding profession in the world.I sure would be a mother soon.