do you think after 9 months its right not to get paid back

United States
January 1, 2010 5:19pm CST
i lent money to my brother to get his car out the impound. well it was 300 to be exact. i told him as soon as he can to pay me back. he was all happy to get his car back that he kept saying yes and thanks so much for helping me. this and that. you know. my mom was like whoa what a great sister you have.... to my brother. well a few months go by and i stop hearing from my brother. i ask my mom and she says hes always visiting her. so i try to call him no answer. i ask my mom to tell him i wanted to talk to him. it was like 5 months later. (thought i gave him enought time.) well she told me she kept talking to him to call me. i waited and wated and still nothing. i kep trying to call him and no answer. im on a social network and thought ok well let me ask his girlfriend. so she emails me back and is very mean and evil. i have no idea where this came from and said i was just looking for my brother. she is mean evil and starts talking badly about my mom. its just not right. in the mean time my brother is still not contacting me. next thing i know his girlfriend says i am harrassing her. he says i saw the emails you sent to her. im like what about the ones she sent to me about mom. and talking badly about our mom? he just totally ignored it. i called my mom and told her what had happened and showed the emails. the next day my brother wanted to talk to my mom and say that i am the bad one. well my mom said sorry but i got the emails and i know what happened. he was mad. then i said i want to know where my money is. he couldnt even give me a penny a week or something or just call me. wtf. what are your thoughts on this issue? he still owes me and his girlfriend is really evil?????? ruining my relationship with my brother......
2 people like this
5 responses
@twoey68 (13627)
• United States
3 Jan 10
On the subject of loaning money...a good rule to follow is if you loan money, don't expect it back. Some ppl, once they have the money, avoid paying it back. Never, ever loan money that you need for another bill...chances are you won't get the money back and you'll end up with the bill being overdue and maybe shut off. As for the evil g/f...there's no telling what your brother might have told her so she may have formed some opinions based on what he has said rather than the actual truth. I'd just consider the money lost, enjoy your relationship with your mom and hope that your brother will evenually come around. [b]~~AT PEACE WITHIN~~ **STANDING STRONG IN MY BELIEFS**[/b]
@celticeagle (159008)
• Boise, Idaho
3 Jan 10
I have made it a personal rule that I never loan or ask for loans from friends or family. It never ends well. When you watch those judge shows on tv what are 75% of the shows about. Some one loaned money to a friend, romantic interest or relative and ended up in court over it. It is sadly comical how badly these people need the money to begin with, even to the point of engraciating themselves and/or pleeding. But when it comes time to pay it back they can't afford to. If you think about it how can they afford to pay it back if they were in such a way that they needed so badly in the first place. It is sad that you have been used in this way.
• United States
2 Jan 10
I've heard of people where they get in a relationship w/ someone and wreck all their friendships & bonds with family thru their own sick manipulations. From what is sounds like this girlfriend really has your brother wrapped around her lil finger. I don't suspect you'll see the money back... until he splits with this chick, grows up & owes up to his obligations even if it's just $25 a pay check KWIM?, or you take his tush to small claims court. Good luck with this mess.
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
1 Jan 10
firebirdlizant hi wow you do have a problem and his girlfriend is not helping the situation.he sounds like he feels guilty and is all angry with himself and you then the girlfriend is not helping things. my dad always said first really one should not a borrower or a lender be but if you lend to a close relative or a best friend do not do it unless you can just make it a gift.otherwise it causes animosity and hard feelings as so seldom does it get paid back. next time tell him to get a second job instead. Now you have to sit down with your brother by himself,not your mom or the girlfriend there, and talk dutch uncle to him,tell hin if he does not pay at least half of it by a certain time you will take him to small claims court then do so. this should shock him into doing right by you.
@ladym33 (10979)
• United States
2 Jan 10
Yes, that is a long time not to pay somebody back. My guess is he does not have the money and he is embarrassed. I have learned that when it comes to lending anyone money you should not do it. If someone needs money for something and you have it to give just give it. Because people who typically need to borrow money from people for things never manage to get ahead enough to pay the money back. My husband and I have leant money to a couple of people and we don't expect to ever get it back, because we know that those people's situations are never going to improve. Unless they win the lottery or something we don't plan on ever seeing that money again, they just don't have it to pay back. As for the nasty girl friend unfortunately that is not a good situation. You can try to work out a payment plan with you brother at a low monthly rate but I am afraid you might have to mark this down as a lesson to never lend money to anyone. People who are able to pay back borrowed money are not the people that borrow money. Perhaps you can offer him an alternative way to pay you back like fixing your car or something in your home, or some home cooked meals or something.