This reminded me of you Grandpa Bob

United States
January 14, 2010 12:19am CST
So I got this in an email today and as I was reading it I couldn't help but think of Grandpa Bob during the whole thing thanks to all of his shoveling and crystal postings...I just had to share it SNOW SHOVELER December 8 - 6:00 PM It started to snow. The first snow of the season and the wife and I took our cocktails and sat for hours by the window watching the huge soft flakes drift down from heaven. It looked like a Grandma Moses Print. So romantic we felt like newlyweds again. I love snow. December 9 We woke to a beautiful blanket of crystal white snow covering every inch of the landscape. What a fantastic sight! Can there be a more lovely place in the whole world? Moving here was the best idea I've ever had! Shoveled for the first time in years and felt like a boy again. I did both our driveway and the sidewalks. This afternoon the snowplow came along and covered up the sidewalks and closed in the driveway, so I got to shovel . What a perfect life! December 12 The sun has melted all our lovely snow.. Such a disappointment! My neighbor tells me not to worry- we'll definitely have a white Christmas. No snow on Christmas would be awful! Bob says we'll have so much snow by the end of winter, that I'll never want to see snow again. I don't think that's possible. Bob is such a nice man, I'm glad he's our neighbor. December 14 Snow, lovely snow! 8 inches last night. The temperature to -20. The cold makes everything sparkle so. The wind took my breath away, but I warmed up by shovelling the driveway and sidewalks. This is the life! The snowplow came back this afternoon and buried everything again. I didn't realize I would have to do quite this much shoveling, but I'll get back in shape this way. I wish I huff and puff so. December 15 20 inches forecast. Sold my van and bought a 4x4 Blazer. Bought snow tires for the wife's car and 2 extra shovels. Stocked the freezer. The wife wants a wood stove in case the electricity goes out. I think that's silly. We aren't in Alaska, after all.December 16 Ice storm this morning. Fell on my butt on the ice in the driveway putting down salt. Hurt like hell. The wife laughed for an hour, which I think was very cruel. December 17 Still way below freezing. Roads are too icy to go anywhere. Electricity was off for 5 hours. I had to pile the blankets on to stay warm. Nothing to do but stare at the wife and try not to irritate her. Guess I should've bought a wood stove, but won't admit it to her. God I hate it when she's right. I can't believe I'm freezing to death in my own living room. December 20 Electricity's back on, but had another 14 inches of the damn stuff last night. More shoveling! Took day. The snowplough came by twice. Tried to find a neighbor kid to shovel, but they said they're too busy playing hockey. I think they're lying. Called the only hardware store around to see about buying snow blower and they're out. Might have another in March. I think they're lying. Bob says I have to shovel or the city will have it done and bill me. I think he's lying. December 22 Bob was right about a white Christmas because 13 more inches of the white crap fell today, and it's so cold, it probably won't till August. Took me 45 minutes to get all dressed up to go out to shovel and then I had to pee. By the time I got undressed, peed and dressed again, I was too tired to shovel. Tried to hire Bob who has a plow on his truck for the rest of the winter, but he says he's too busy. I think the butthole is lying. December 23 Only 2 inches of snow today. And it warmed up to 0. The wife wanted me to decorate the front of the house this . What is she, nuts?!! Why didn't she tell me to do that a month ago? She says she did but I think she's lying. December 24 6 inches - Snow packed so hard by snowplow, I broke the shovel. Thought I was having a heart attack. If I ever catch the son of a b*#ch who drives that snow plow, I'll drag him through the snow by his balls beat him to death my broken shovel. I know he hides around the corner and waits for me to finish shovelling and then he comes down the street at a 100 miles an hour and throws snow all over where I've just been! Tonight the wife wanted me to sing Christmas carols with her and open our presents, but I was too busy watching for the damn snowplow. December 25 Merry fricking Christmas! 20 more inches of the damn slop tonight - Snowed in. The idea of shovelling makes my blood boil. God, I hate the snow! Then the snowplow driver came by asking for a donation, and I hit him over the head with my shovel. The wife says I have a bad attitude. I think she's a fricking idiot. If I have to watch "It's A Wonderful Life" one more time, I'm going to stuff her into the microwave. December 26 Still snowed in. Why the hell did I ever move here? It was all HER idea. She's really getting on my nerves. December 27 Temperature dropped to -30 and the pipes froze; came after 14 hours of waiting for him, he only charged me $1,400 to replace all my pipes. December 28 Warmed up to above -20. Still snowed in. My WIFE is driving me crazy!!! December 29 10 more inches. Bob says I have to shovel the roof or it could cave in. That's the silliest thing I ever heard. How dumb does he think I am? December 30 Roof caved in. I beat up the snow plow driver, and now he is suing me for a million dollars, not only beating I gave him, but also for trying to shove the broken snow shovel up his BUTT. The wife went home to her mother. Nine more inches predicted. December 31 I set fire to what's left of the house. No more shoveling. January 8 Feel so good. I just love those little pills they keep giving me. Why am I tied to the bed?
4 people like this
9 responses
@dawnald (84146)
• Shingle Springs, California
14 Jan 10
I remember a version of this one. Replace all the names with Dawn. That is what would happen to my sanity in snow country. Grandpa Bob seems to be holding up remarkably well though.
1 person likes this
@webeishere (36353)
• United States
14 Jan 10
I always hold up in Winter. I love my snow and cld. It's been in the 30's and I'm about to whine about wanting more snow. HAPPY POSTINGS FROM GRANDPA BOB!!~
• United States
14 Jan 10
Hehe..yes I agree that he has been holding up very well. What reminded me the most of Grandpa Bob was how it talks about the plow throwing the snow back up in the driveway right after he was out there shoveling it all out....
1 person likes this
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
15 Jan 10
Interesting story. I've heard other similar versions. Thankfully, we haven't gotten any snow after the first that came in the first week of December. Hopefully, the weather will hold up until spring. We just have to contend with the rain though. Which I will take over the snow anyday.
• United States
21 Jan 10
Uhh...lucky you bounce. We must have gotten atleast a foot and a half so far. While the last few days have been a lot nicer and melted most of it away i know that this is not the last of it...
• United States
21 Jan 10
Oh and yes..I am slacking today~ Thanks a bunch for responding
@celticeagle (119115)
• Boise, Idaho
15 Jan 10
That was halarious! Thanks for sharing. Love the lead in to the ending. How fun! Winter is horrible everywhere but this seems worse than normal. Ugh! So glad when Spring gets here I can hardly stand it. Yes, indeed! What a perfect life. Sounds like he lives in the opposite of hadese.
• United States
15 Jan 10
Hehehe..I know I wasn't expecting that ending although I knew that there was going to be an ending I was guessing one like that I agree that this winter is harder and I am sure it is going to be longer..I know our summer wasn't as warm either...too funny! Thanks a bunch for your response celtic
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (119115)
• Boise, Idaho
15 Jan 10
Alot of change.
@webeishere (36353)
• United States
14 Jan 10
This is one that has been around here in Minnesota for many years and I still get a ick out of it. Thanks. HAPPY POSTINGS FROM GRANDPA BOB!!~
• United States
14 Jan 10
Hello Grandpa Bob, I could see how this would be big in Minnesota with all the snow fall that has been coming down. When I read the part about the plow it reminded me of your posts about how the plow would throw the snow up at the end of your driveway...Hehehe
1 person likes this
@webeishere (36353)
• United States
14 Jan 10
Now we have all kinds of SLOP on the roads as it's been above normal temps and sunny. Bring me snow dang it. Hee hee. HAPPY POSTINGS FROM GRANDPA BOB!!~
• United States
7 Apr 10
I've never seen this one but it holds pretty true here as well. Just not as much snow as mentioned *LOL* But yeah that plow always has good timeing.... Though I wish we could get a woodstove but you can't get homeowners insurance if you have one wich does and doesn't make sense. Or it could be a conspiracy between the insurance companies, utility companies, tree huggers, & heating oil companies.... but what do I know *LOL*
• United States
12 Apr 10
LOL..I am betting it is more of a conspiracy Hehehe, only because I like your thoughts on this one. Our snow is finally gone and I am glad for that and while the past few days have been a bit colder it still beats the snow 100% Thanks a bunch for your response snuggle
@dorannmwin (36698)
• United States
17 Jan 10
All I can say is ROFL. As I read this I was busting a gut laughing. You see, we don't live in snow country and never get a snowstorm(s) like the ones mentioned in this. However, if we were to even have so much as an inch of snow night after night here, that would be exactly the way that everyone around here would react. If the electricity starts to go out for even a couple of hours there is a major run on generators. It really is hilarious.
• United States
21 Jan 10
Hehehe..this reminds me of when we lived in Virginia. The first year we got there it was in the high 20's and they got about an inch of snow and my husband and I were walking around in our tshirts still while everyone there was bundled up in their thick winter coats and knee high socks. Where we live high 20's in the winter is like high 70's in the summer but because Virginia doesn't get much snow want to stock up and store away with an inch of snow....Hehehe Thanks for your response dorann
@paula27661 (15899)
• Australia
17 Jan 10
That’s funny! It is strangely very true to life though! We don’t get snow where we live a and, as much as I envy people who live with snow I can appreciate what a pain it would become after a while to keep shovelling or risk getting snowed in or worse have the roof cave in like the poor unfortunate fellow in the story! I haven’t seen snow in years since I moved to Australia from Italy, I have missed it but then again I’ve never had to deal with the problems it can cause.
• United States
21 Jan 10
While snow starts to be too much after awhile I am glad that we get it. I am so used to it and I am not sure if I can live in an area where they get no snow. I just wish we could get it for one month during Christmas instead of 9 months like we do now. Thanks a bunch for your response paula
1 person likes this
@MsTickle (24983)
• Australia
16 Jan 10
Very funny...I had that email years ago...lol and you're right...it is reminiscent of Grandpa Bob.
• United States
21 Jan 10
Thanks for your response tickle
@PeacefulWmn9 (10424)
• United States
15 Jan 10
This reminds me of where I live...snow! I love it for the first half of winter or a bit longer, but yes, one can get too much of even a thing they love! Karen
• United States
21 Jan 10
I would be happy if we got it for the month of December and then that was it. It just lasts too long and I start to get cabin fever after so long of it. I love snow as long as I don't have to go out into it but I hate having to drive in it...Thanks a bunch for your response karen