Dead beat parents????

@Java09 (3085)
United States
January 19, 2010 10:41am CST
I'm talking about either parent that is required to pay child support and doesn't.Do you think they should be harder on these people?My daughter's father owes her,way over $12,000 dollars.I live in New Jersey in the United States,and they are not strict enough in enforcing the child support.My daughter's father hasn't paid in two years.I have my case with the probation department.They know where he is and they do not enforce it or arrest him.I wonder what's the matter with this state.I hear other states enforce payment.What do you think about this child support?Should it be enforced more?
5 people like this
6 responses
• United States
19 Jan 10
The laws need to be stiffer on the payers. I do understand they have lives as well. But,the judge told my ex to pay $60.00 a week when he was working on the set of new york under cover. He made over $17.00 an hour plus he paid no rent to live with his mother. I don't care about the money he owes to me. he can keep it and hove it up his rear. if he had bills and rent to pay I would be more concerned. I think Ny is not giving the mothers enough money to care for a child as well. So i wash my hands with it.
3 people like this
@Java09 (3085)
• United States
19 Jan 10
My daughter's father always likes to cry poverty.He lives off of women and uses their money.When he does work he doesn't pay his own way in life.He met5 someone else and had a kid with them when he don't even pay for my daughter,he gets sympathy from the judge.If I were the judge I would yell at him to stop having children then.The money is owed to the child,I don't consider it to be for me.I don't even bother about it anymore.
1 person likes this
@ladym33 (11008)
• United States
19 Jan 10
For sure it should be enforced more. Here in Illinois if a parent owes back child support and is not paying the state will garnish that person's wages to pay for the child support. It sounds like you might need to get yourself a good lawyer who will be able to make sure your child gets what she deserves.
@Java09 (3085)
• United States
19 Jan 10
I gotta find something to do about it.He doesn't want to pay and he always pretends he isn't working when he is.He went and met soemone else and had a child with them when he don't pay for this one.
@Hatley (164484)
• Garden Grove, California
19 Jan 10
hi Java I too live in the US in Ca and I hear that a lot from my friends here too. but to me if they arrest the father how can he make money to pay the back child support if he is stuck in prison, that would punish him sure, but you need the money a lot more than you want him punished I would hope. two years, thats dreadful, if he stuck around long enough to make a baby he h as to support that child. sure child support should be enforced a lot more than it is but jailing cannot help, he has to have money to pay money, and working I wou ld think would be the only way of getting the needed money.
2 people like this
@Java09 (3085)
• United States
19 Jan 10
He works ,he gets under the table jobs.He don't want to pay.He met someone else and had a child with them right away.I think something should be done,because alot of them do prtend they aren't working,I don't think its right.The money is for the child.If I collect anyting,I want to put it in the bank for my daughter because it's hers.
1 person likes this
@MoonGypsy (4613)
• United States
19 Jan 10
no one is going to like me for this one...and i am a single mother at that. i am a survivor of domestic violence and had to leave him to save me and my son's life. he left the state after trying to hurt himself and us when I wouldn't come back to him. we hadn't seen him since. i don't have a child support order, and he hasn't done anything to help out or contact his son. this is fine with me. i know it is probably not with my son, but he just doesn't see him as the monster i see him as. he is his dad no matter how bad my son saw he do things and hurt us. i understand that. i am just glad he was away. i couldn't be a healthy mom being with him. i don't want anything from him. i know he has a responsibility to his kids. that's on him. now, some people would say that he more than deserves to pay. probably so. what about the guys who's only crime is break up with the mom, or marriage not working out. the child support laws are already strict. parents under those orders can't do ALOT in their lives with it on them...get federal aid. some states i think take away drives licenses. so, no we should have all hundreds of thousands of men (or women) in jail for not being together with someone? what would they ever be able to do to help their kids in jail. when they come out, they will be felons and will be able to do less. makes no sense other than to have a means for one parent to punish the other parent and using the state to do it. the child support thing is waaay taken out of control. it should be revised, so that we are not taxing people for not being in a relationship...whew! true what they say, it's cheaper to keep em.
1 person likes this
@Java09 (3085)
• United States
19 Jan 10
That's why I'm not with the guy and haven't been in years.He was into domestic violence then I threw his stuff out the door and locked it while he was at work.I was afraid to get rid of him,that was the best way.All hell broke loose when he got home,I'll say that much.It was awful,but I felt sooooo relieved to have him out of the house.Hee's been harassing me ever since for it.He's a stalker and followed me around.He's spied at me at my job.He's nuts,but I feel he should pay.The courts would never listen to me,they would not give me a restraining order.If people don't want to support their kids they shouldn't have any then.I think he should have to.
@RachelleNH (1408)
• United States
19 Jan 10
Oh don't even get me started...same situation here...he told me in court that I'd never see a penny of it-because I divorced him for cheating. Okay so 5 years go by-it racks up...they do absolutely nothing til 8 months ago..He was an absconder fugitive for years..Then suddently-they found him, he went to court, said he'd lost his job (oh the poor thing) so they let him off once again... They just put a warrant (a few months ago) for his arrest out so he started paying some money only to get off that and another probation and warrant for his arrest-once they clear that-which they're doing now.. he'll stop paying again. I didn't know if you were in trouble with the law and paid child support-you could get out of the charges?! Argh...so he's out there having other kids since then..2 since that time. I'm telling you it's aggravating as heck. They just slap his hand and feel sorry for him. Meanwhile, I have to take care of my kids no matter what hits me..I lost some income and was struggling-almost lost my car...but they didn't feel sorry for me. I don't know what they can do-but they need to do something..It's sure in favor of the parent leaving their child and having more.
@Java09 (3085)
• United States
19 Jan 10
They should do something.He met someone else and had another kid with her right away.He doesn't pay for this one.He always cries poverty.I don't think they should be leanient on them.I'm a single mother and It's hard for me.I only qualitfy for low payinig jobs.They never feel sorry for me either in court.They act concerned for the jerk.
• United States
19 Jan 10
This happened to me also...then they take that child into account as to how much support you will get. Mine also lives off women, he preys on single mothers that have managed to survive-then brings them down and gets them pregnant-hence they kick him out and it starts all over again! Argh! I divorced mine because he got another woman pregnant-and I found out. I had suspected for awhile, but didn't want to be wrong. So he was mad because I was no longer going to support him. Huh? LOL It's a shame..I think they need to make sure these dads don't have any more children that the state will have to help pay for. It's enraging! Mine has no reason other than spite.I never stopped him from seeing the kids either..even when he didn't pay.
1 person likes this
• United States
20 Jan 10
depends on the circumstance. i know a guy who has 3 jobs and 8 kids he's paying for,and as such has to rotate payments though he's supposed to pay every child every month (and gets jailed every now and then because of it). but if they're not paying at all,definetly. they were part responsible for creating that child and should man up.