Gifts and the marriage season
@Professor2010 (20162)
India
May 29, 2010 4:04am CST
Here in my country, it is the marriage season of Hindus; the days of marriage are decided as per our almanacs. I have attended several weddings and have to attend some more till end of July. In each I give some gifts, this may range from cash to cloth, jewelry or articles of home use like TV, audio systems, cooking range etc.
This has to be decided based upon several factors like relation with the person who is going to marry or his/her parents. If a friend or close relation, I try to find out what they gave in wedding of my sons or daughters. The gift I will give must be costlier than that; it is a matter of prestige.
Today there are two marriages that I will attend with my wife, 
the first one is wedding of daughter of my nephew, so we will be giving saree, blouse to the bride, cash of rupees 1101/- and a mixer/grinder too for use, whenever she will use it, she will remember us. The second one is of son of a friend, not so close; we will give a cash gift of 100/- only. 
So how do you decide your gifts for wedding and other occasions? Should it not be an article of daily use? Please share your views.
Prof
the first one is wedding of daughter of my nephew, so we will be giving saree, blouse to the bride, cash of rupees 1101/- and a mixer/grinder too for use, whenever she will use it, she will remember us. The second one is of son of a friend, not so close; we will give a cash gift of 100/- only.
So how do you decide your gifts for wedding and other occasions? Should it not be an article of daily use? Please share your views.
Prof5 people like this
13 responses
@Professor2010 (20162)
• India
31 May 10
Kirthy during marriage seasons price goes up, traders earn well, thanks . Welcome always.
Cheers.
Prof
Cheers.
Prof
@Lakota12 (42600)
• United States
29 May 10
Here they have a bridal shower where the bride gets gifts.
and then they get more at reception.
usually it is household goods that they need for kitchen frontroom patio.
adn they get extra gifts so then they have ot figure out what they need to trade for
1 person likes this
@Canellita (12029)
• United States
31 May 10
Weddings can occur any time of the year in the states but they happen more often between April and June, perhaps because of the weather. I think it would be more difficult for many people for many reasons if weddings only happened in a particular season.
I choose a gift based on my relationship to the couple but I always try to choose something nice but practical that they will actually use and enjoy or something they may not have already.
1 person likes this
@Professor2010 (20162)
• India
31 May 10
Thanks my friend, gift certaily depends upon relation with the person.
Thanks for sharing. Cheers.
Prof
Prof 
@tigeraunt (6326)
• Philippines
5 Jun 10
dear professor,
mostly the gifts that i give are things that would be needed in the kitchen. for close friends and relatives, i add cash.
there is this custom and part of tradition in filipino weddings wherein the newly weds have their first dance as a couple and guests around them pin money on the clothes that they are wearing. that is mostly how they get their cash gift. although some still place it in envelopes and give directly to the couple.
have a nice day.
ann
there is this custom and part of tradition in filipino weddings wherein the newly weds have their first dance as a couple and guests around them pin money on the clothes that they are wearing. that is mostly how they get their cash gift. although some still place it in envelopes and give directly to the couple.
have a nice day.
ann1 person likes this
@Professor2010 (20162)
• India
5 Jun 10
Thanks for sharing about your place.
Welcome always.
Cheers.
Prof
Cheers.
Prof
@vathsala30 (3732)
• India
31 May 10
Hi bhuwanji
Generally we use to give money only so that they will buy what ever they want, whether it is household articles, jewelleries, or clothes or any other things they need to run a family. Secondly if we give anything like a watch, clock, mixer grinder or any other items like that, if they already have that item, it will become an inventory for them and so they try to dispose off by gifting it to some other person or sell it. So our love and affection in giving such things will have no value
1 person likes this
@Professor2010 (20162)
• India
2 Jun 10
Hi Vathsala
Giving money is certainly the best option, i agree
Thanks . Cheers.
Prof
Prof 
@udayrao2 (781)
• India
1 Jun 10
Hi Prof
Same here- but there has been a trend here since last couple of years- on the invitation it says" NO PRESENTS PLEASE NO BOUQUETS " etc - so most people follow that, unless they are very close in which case the presents are gifted privately at home and not at the marriage function
1 person likes this
@Professor2010 (20162)
• India
2 Jun 10
Hi Uday
I too received some cards like that, felt bad, may be it indicates 'come with presentation'
Thanks
Welcome always.
Cheers.
Prof
Cheers.
Prof 
@Sherry12 (2472)
• United States
31 May 10
June is a busy month for weddings in the United States. We have a saying that goes "March winds bring April Showers, April showers bring May flowers, and May flowers bring June brides."
My husband and I have 2 weddings to go to in June. They are both daughters of my cousins. We base the amount we spend based on the relationship. We are lucky that all 3 girls have registered what gifts they need at local department stores. That way we are sure we give them something they need. The store then marks off what has been purchased so they don't receive the same gift twice.
My 2 cousins and I are close and we have already decided what we will spend on each of the girls, so we will each spend the same amount. I am thinking about giving them the amount in money though, so they can buy something special on their honeymoon.
For our own daughter, we are paying for the wedding. So that is her and her fiance's present from us.
@Professor2010 (20162)
• India
31 May 10
Wonderful response Sherry dear. Thanks for telling in details.
Welcome always.
Cheers.
Prof
Cheers.
Prof
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
29 May 10
he your customs sound lovely.we have no set wedding times here but a lot of people do get married in June, why I am never sure. we give mostly household type things to the married couple even towels and wash cloth sets it depends on how well we know them and how much we can really afford too. other occasions again it depends on what we can afford a nd how close we are to the person or persons.
and how much we can really afford too. other occasions again it depends on what we can afford a nd how close we are to the person or persons.1 person likes this
@Professor2010 (20162)
• India
31 May 10
Hello Hatley welcome. So it is June mostly, all say that.
Thanks . Welcome always.
Cheers.
Prof
Cheers.
Prof
@goddessjes (788)
• Philippines
30 May 10
hi there prof.
isn't it nice being invited weddings? i love weddings. i enjoy different kinds of celebrations, beliefs, cultures, etc. the thought that two souls are legally bound to forever makes me feel good. that in this populated planet, two individuals found each other. and for most, since June is soon coming, it is the month for weddings. =)
as for gift giving, as a guest, my preference of a gift would always be cash. my explanation is the couple can use if for something that they actually like and it helps them save up for the lost and spent money during their wedding. money could help the couple start financially. plus i really am bad with gift giving. i do not really know what appropriate gifts to give a married couple. i end up giving something that they won't like. so i guess, money is better appreciated. plus a wedding card. =)
1 person likes this
@Professor2010 (20162)
• India
31 May 10
Giving cash is the best option. This can be used in the best possible way. Thanks for response. Welcome always.
Cheers.
Prof
Cheers.
Prof
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
30 May 10
I think gift giving requires taking the time to give it a little thought. For weddings it depends; we attended a wedding not too long ago and for this couple it was their second marriage; they had been living together a while and really did not need any household items like one would ordinarily buy as wedding gifts. This couple asked the guests to just give money so they could pay for part of the reception. I thought this was a great idea. I hope you enjoy the weddings you are going to attend!
1 person likes this
@Professor2010 (20162)
• India
31 May 10
yes they can utilize the money in a much better way as you say..
Thanks for response . Welcome always.
Cheers.
Prof
Cheers.
Prof1 person likes this
@srganesh (6340)
• India
10 Jun 10
Yes Professor,I follow the same procedure as you.To close relatives,we have to spend much and for friends ,we can spare a little.And one more thing,you have forgotten to mention.That is marriages we have to attend for the sake of business.There it may cost how much business we get through them.
@AjaySinghBaghel (5506)
• India
29 May 10
For me it depends on the relation. If its just to maintain a relation coming from many years or followed by our earlier generations, it would be a normal gift, may be cash or cloths. If there is a marriage in a direct relation it would be definitely a gift choosen after lot of thought process. what that person likes and what fits to our budget, all that.
@Professor2010 (20162)
• India
31 May 10
If the person is close it is better to consult about the gift article to avoid duplicates...
Thanks . Welcome always.
Cheers.
Prof
Cheers.
Prof
@chm001 (206)
• India
29 May 10
Hi Sir I am from your country. In my place where I leaving I have go to many marrige season with my family, friend. When i go to a marrige ceremoney with my family we give the gift usually Cash money, Some kind Juallery, Saree, Shirt and other usefull things. But when i go to a friends marrige ceremoney we give some different gift such as- Dairy, Book, Bookey, Card.(maximum time). I personaly hope when we gift any person this time we think what is the usefull things for this person. So plz giv giv a usefull gift on any ocasion as per your capasity.
Thanks for a good Discussion
1 person likes this
@Professor2010 (20162)
• India
31 May 10
Hello chm, welcome to my discussion and to mylot.
Thanks for nice response . Welcome always.
Cheers.
Prof
Cheers.
Prof