Living with a Bum

@desrie (297)
June 13, 2010 9:23pm CST
Okay people, Desrie's back! but, i'm not here with a vengeance, but rather, i'm here to ask ya'll a question....do any of you have a bum in your house and how does it feel? me? yeah. i have a bum in my house and it sucks big time. you see, i have a big bro. and he's 6 years older than i am and he doesn't want to work. on the other hand, I WORK MY BUTT OFF to place food on the table. and all he does is sleep,drink,smoke,watch tv, go to the bathroom,eat some more...and the cycle continues... and i am getting fed up...
4 people like this
15 responses
@samson1967 (7424)
• India
14 Jun 10
I cannot live without a bum, because I love those pairs very much, hahaha, Feed him now, he will feed you later, time has to come for everything to fall in a right place.
1 person likes this
@desrie (297)
14 Jun 10
feed him till when? i'v been feeding him for almost 8 years now.ever since i first worked.and he hadn't had a job since then.hell,he didn't HAVE a job even when i was still in college
1 person likes this
@Hatley (148967)
• Garden Grove, California
14 Jun 10
desrie I think Samson is teasing. pairs like pairs in buttocks, 'english word for bottom or rear end or butt. a play on words'here as he is not talking about a lazy man, I don't think.
@desrie (297)
14 Jun 10
eh?but he said feed him....hmmmm ***rubbing chin***
@Hatley (148967)
• Garden Grove, California
14 Jun 10
hi desrie I have three words I think you should say to the bum who happens to be your big brother. GET A JOB NO MORE FREE LUNCHES well that turned out to be more than three words, more like 7 but even if hes big brother its not your job to work and feed both of you , is it? A big brother should really look after his'younger sister in my way of thinking. Do suggest he pay rent and get a job,if you can work so can he. I do not have a bum here as I live in a retirement center until my son who is out of work can get a job and accumulate enough money to get the two of us back into an apartment again.But my son is no bum thats for sure.
@desrie (297)
14 Jun 10
i envy you hatley. at least your son is trying hard to find employment. but this one i have at home just won't move his lazy behin off the couch. i mean, my mom can't do anything about it, my dad already lost interest in trying to get him employed, my 2 sisters are annoyed at him...and now, he's passing the responsibility to me. i mean...f*ck it..i have kids of my own...i told him that before but still...to no avail...***shaking head***
1 person likes this
@Hatley (148967)
• Garden Grove, California
14 Jun 10
hi desrie you would think he would have a bit of brotherly love and with you with children of your own,you sure dont need him to look after too. Oh my maybe someone could come up with a job in which he could watch tV allday and get paid. lol lol. Does he even watch your kids while you are at work, but again maybe he would not be that good a sitter if he can only watch tv. lol.My best friend's son got a job designing computer games, maybe he needs something like that where he can play and still work?
@desrie (297)
16 Jun 10
Oh! I wish Hatley. I just wish someone would come up with a job that would keep his behind on a couch all day. That's what he wants anyway. He wants a high paying job but he doesn't have that much of a work history...How would that help him?
• United States
15 Jun 10
wow!!...Reading all of your story i am not completely shocked at it. I don't know how it feels to live with a bum. But however i do know how it feels when a bum comes for a visit and doesn't want to leave.They come to your house ask for food and money. bums!! Bums these days don't even have the NERVE to smell fresh. They just walk into your house smelling so awful.(THESE BUMS ARE FRIENDS OF MY BOYFRIEND)
@desrie (297)
16 Jun 10
LOL! That's....gross.. LOL! Your bf's friend don't take a shower at all?
• United States
17 Jun 10
lol! only one dont like water to much. my man friends always want food or money sometimes both. when my man gets paid they know when to come over. i always say bad things to them
@sid556 (31019)
• United States
15 Jun 10
Hi Desrie, And he is still there...why??? I understand that family helps each other out in a time of need but seriously.....8 yrs and he just sits about sleeping, drinking & smoking etc? That is NOT help that is aiding and abetting. When you get really really really fed up then you will put your foot down and stop letting him mooch off of you.
@desrie (297)
16 Jun 10
hi Sid.. You are absolutely right...I'll find the right time to talk to the guy and tell him that I'm fed up from feeding him and enough is enough.I just hope I find the right words and he doesn't cause any trouble for me
@sid556 (31019)
• United States
16 Jun 10
Hi Desrie, Good luck. I know it is hard but it is not fair to you to be the only one working and trying. He may get upset but let him. You have been more than kind enough to him and he has done nothing in return but mooch off of you.
• India
14 Jun 10
my condelences to you. I know how difficult it is to have an age old person sitting jobless at home. i don't know how your family situation is. so I forbid from telling suggestions to you, also by considering the age factor.
@desrie (297)
16 Jun 10
Age factor? I'm 28, he's 35.I started earning when I was just 15 years old...
• India
16 Jun 10
i told abt me, i am just 19 :)
@jennyze (7048)
• Indonesia
14 Jun 10
Yes, I do have a bum brother, so I know how you feel. I've sent him to live with my mother in a village, in a different island. You are lucky that your brother only wants food from you, mine makes problem anywhere he goes. The incident before I've sent him away cost my mother to sell her rice fields in the village to cover all his debts, after I and my other brother lost resources how to pay such a mount of money. Yes, he has a habit of convincing people to lend some money to him (not small amounts) and then run away to another city leaving my other brothers and me pay the bills. He still makes problem in the village, but many are aware of his 'habit' and that helps constraining his urges.
@desrie (297)
16 Jun 10
Oh..you even got it worse than me...And here I thought I am the only one who's got this problem. Did you do something to at least restrain your brother from getting into more trouble now?
@jennyze (7048)
• Indonesia
17 Jun 10
I'd like to think so. I forbid him to come to Bali. There were some private debts he made a couple of years ago in Bali that had not been settled till now. We only managed to settled his debts with legal financial institutions and friends we know. Some people managed to get to my other brother's work place and demanded payments, but my brother was adamant not to pay even when these people threatened to bring a police to his work place. My brother turned the table back to these people by asking them: "Did you seek my approval when you lend my brother some money? Why do you all now want me to pay? Even if you bring some police here, you do not have any grounds to demand the payment from me." So, I told about this fact to my 'bum' brother to not to come to Bali ever again, otherwise some people might be ready to make a meat out of him. I also asked my mother not to give him any big sum of money, so he cannot go to other city to make troubles. We all just hope it works.
@meirhu (367)
• Israel
14 Jun 10
Understood why you're fed up. Is there anyway that either he or you can LEAVE the house ? Do you really HAVE to live with him ? What do your parents say ?
@desrie (297)
16 Jun 10
Leave MY house? No way. There is no way I will leave my house just because that bum won't get his lazy behind off the couch. Well, my parents are already fed up with him. Everyday they lecture him that he should get a job to at least support his son, but....well...he's a lazy sssss.....if you know what I mean
@meirhu (367)
• Israel
16 Jun 10
Hi Desrie I understand that you are living with your parents. Don't you have a fiancee that will live with when you are married ? Do you have anything against living with your fiancee BEFORE you are married ? Do you have Yahoo messenger ?
@ShellyB (5245)
• United States
15 Jun 10
I do not have a bum T home we all help in. Retain wYs so we can have a home food and utilities Some of us go out more than others and well from reading the comments to you and only some of them I will say make him find a job or he can leave your home at the very least make him find public assistance so he can help with his food sooner or later they will make him do volunteer work or look for a job and shores he should be also babysiitting for you or cleaning the yard no more free ride, what is this man going to do if something happens to your or your parents? He could be homeless that's what. I have an uncle like that but does not live close to me so I can't help him if he had been forced to do something when he was younger his present could have been better.
@desrie (297)
16 Jun 10
That is just the thing. My mom always tell him that they won't live forever to support his lazy behind. And I sure won't support him if my mom isn't here anymore. And he knows that. That's why he's trying to get as much as he can from us before he decides to move on... IF he decides to move that is
1 person likes this
• United States
14 Jun 10
they shouldnt be considered bums unless they do nothing to provide or help out with!!! I have had alot of friends or family move in with me over the past years and i look at it as helping out not bumming off of!
@desrie (297)
16 Jun 10
Well...as long a they help around the house I guess that's okay...
• China
14 Jun 10
Frankly speaking , I really cannot stand that guy who behave like a bum . If I was in your position , I would have Broken with him . I don't want to be bleeding heart . because it not only causes trouble for yourself , but also let him never know the meaning of responsibility .
@desrie (297)
16 Jun 10
You're right. ALL of you are right actually, but the thing is, I can't stand to see his kid crying because he doesn't have anything to eat....I don't care if my brother won't eat. But I DO care if his kid doesn't
@oldchem1 (8145)
14 Jun 10
As an English person this discussion made me laugh!! In England a bum is a backside, a butt an @rse!!! So I AM living with a bum - a big one at that!!
@desrie (297)
16 Jun 10
At least I got one myLotter happy. LOL
@juggerogre (1659)
• Philippines
14 Jun 10
You should really talk to your brother. He's older so he should be the one doing the feeding not the other way around. Yes he is your brother but that doesn't mean he have to rely on you forever. He's old enough and its about time for him to find a job.
@desrie (297)
16 Jun 10
Oh I wish it were that easy jugger.... :( But thanks for liftingmy spirits up. I would talk to him again and if he doesn't do a thing, then it's bye bye time...
@Geomos (323)
• South Africa
14 Jun 10
Welcome back Des, we missed you ;-( Fortunately I have never had to deal with a bum in my house. In this day and age of hard financial times, it is not very mature of your bro to sponge off the rest of the family to fund his lazy habits. Where does he get the money to fund his smoking and drinking? From you? Somehow you need to cut his supply of money that supports his habits. Is there any reason why he does not work? Does he have a handicap of some sort or is he just lazy? He sure would not last very long in my house. He would be out on his ear until he could earn his own money to pay rent etc.
@desrie (297)
16 Jun 10
Hi Geomos! I think you're the only one who missed me here in myLot. LOL, I'm kidding. You're lucky you don't have a bum in your house. And I'm pretty sure nobody would want to be one if your around LOL. Anyway, he gets his money from my mom. And is he handicapped? Well...my sister thinks so. since he won't move one muscle to help around the house. He's just lazy. I'm just waiting for his wife to come home from Dubai so I could finally get them out.
@natnickeep (2340)
• United States
14 Jun 10
Yea feed him some tough love and kick his butt out. Tell him he's got this long and stick to it. Either get a job or get out.
@desrie (297)
16 Jun 10
LOL. I've[e done that too. But he's got one thing that keeps him coming back. His son. He stays with us and we feed the kid so, it also happens, we have to feed to father too...
• Pasay, Philippines
22 Apr 12
hahaha.. welll there's something to bully at of that's the case. That's life. They'll eventually learn to cope up with themselves if they're so fed up with all of your comparison.