Do You Make Yourself At Home When You're Away From Home?

@roberten (3131)
United States
June 28, 2010 1:21am CST
What are people thinking? We receive guest from all over the globe at the inn and I find that there is one thing universal among all of them: they have a tendency to behave as if they are at home rather than as guest of a commercial institution of hospitality. Many of them walk around topless (men); others expose their underwear, or lack-there-of, effectively showing off their plumber's backsides. It astounds me how many people show up for breakfast without shoes or shirts; in their p.j.'s or other clothing they've slept in- which may or may not be dirty and/or torn. They like to bring their own cups and bowls to use instead of the clean utensils provided; and generally, theirs are dirty. And for the life of me, I can't figure out why they feel the need to drag our guest room furniture outside onto the sidewalk. We have had to chain down the pool chairs to keep them from taking those inside their rooms. The more bold will rent our least expensive room (one person/one bed) and then try to throw a pool party with tons of unregistered guests. People are curious and their behavior is even more so. I often wonder if we have made our guest feel so comfortable that they feel they can run around the property as if they are at home, or do they do what they do because they are just not thinking before they act. Is modesty a thing of the past; how about respecting that which belongs to others? Any thoughts or comments?
3 people like this
12 responses
@med889 (5958)
28 Jun 10
No matter how much someone can ask me to feel at home in their home but I cannot do so because I just cannot, my home is my home afterall and I can do everything in my home whereas in other's home I will always be feeling uneasy. I will never be feeling comfortable if they ask me to take whatever I want to eat in the kitchen, I will be hesitating and thus sometimes refusing also even If I had wished for that stuff to eat. So my home is always the home sweet home.
1 person likes this
@sunsham68 (1378)
• India
28 Jun 10
oh i am so like you i too cannot openly ask for what i do want too but at least i can politely say no to something that i really dont want like doing something or going somewhere and stuff.
@roberten (3131)
• United States
28 Jun 10
med889 and sunsham68, you both share my feelings about that which belongs to someone else; I try to be as little trouble as possible. You would be surprised at the number of people who are nothing like us.
• Philippines
29 Jun 10
You might think that I'm insane, but I believe when there is something strange happening or when you implement things and you don't get the right result maybe there's something missing or wrong, maybe God is demonstrating something, maybe you need to look deeper, maybe a little change the way you look the situation. They say if you want to change something the change must begin inside of you and out, hope you won't take this in a negative way, but sometimes when there is something wrong inside of us unnoticeable it will manifest outside the way people or things react on our homes in us, please don't get mad maybe its not that serious maybe you should need to focus on the things you need to implement a little authority. God bless.
1 person likes this
@roberten (3131)
• United States
5 Aug 11
luisadannointed, I am not speaking about a person or an individual's home; this is a place of business; however, I do agree that there are steps that should be taken to inform guests what is expected of them. When not taught, people will usually live life in the path of least resistance; it would help if ALL the staff held our guests to the same standards. It is difficult and very uncomfortable to correct people on negative behavior, especially if one does not like confrontation; but I think this is necessary in creating a more wholesome environment. I think people feel so at home here until they let there manners fall by the wayside. In any event, it is not okay to be disrespectful to one's host or fellow guests. Personal responsibility cannot be passed like a buck, it is ours and we should own it. And by the way, no offense taken.
@Hatley (164485)
• Garden Grove, California
29 Jun 10
hi roberten I think a lot of this depends on the guests. some people behave with decorum when they are staying at an inn while others act like they own the place and everyone is just there to wait on them alone. I have noticed when we went on vacations when I was a teen. My parents had always stressed good manners so I did know not to make an idiot out of myself ever.Also I think a lot of middle class people are more careful of their behavior than the more wealthy people who live to order others around. I was often apalled at the actions of fellow Americans when in a new place and dressed like they were in their own homes. It made me embarrassed for them and for myself.
1 person likes this
@roberten (3131)
• United States
29 Jun 10
Bravo to your parents for teaching you proper etiquette and bless you for being an obedient child. It means so much to those of use in the hospitality business when a guest is respectful and well mannered. There are those of us who are socially challanged, for sure; but all it takes is one polite individual to remind us why we do what you do.
@sender621 (14956)
• United States
28 Jun 10
I am usually an easy going person and can adapt to new surroundings quite well. It was easier to feel at home away from home when I was younger. Everything in life was a new challenge. As I get older, I welcome being away from home less and less. Now I often am uncomfortable when I am away from home for too long.
@roberten (3131)
• United States
28 Jun 10
Ditto, I am quite the home body and will often have problems relaxing enough to sleep when I'm away from home.
@puccagirl (7316)
• Israel
28 Jun 10
I actually do quite the opposite. When I am away from home, I don't need to feel like I am at home at all, because then, what is the point of going away in the first place? I like to dress up, stay in the room and take care of it, it gives the trip a bit of a luxury feeling. So if anything, I probably behave better when away compared to home!
1 person likes this
@roberten (3131)
• United States
28 Jun 10
Oh my, a dream guest! Would you care to visit us for a free night's stay.
@srganesh (6349)
• India
28 Jun 10
Some people are reckless in using the public properties. they are arrogant even. For me , if I am staying in any inn, I will make comfortable with the things they provide but not make it at home. Just I will be aware of using the public property and I don't think that I am the owner of it.
1 person likes this
@roberten (3131)
• United States
28 Jun 10
We invite guests to be at ease, but we do attract a lot of older guests who are put off by some of the "reckless" behavior displayed. We are very pleased our guest are super relaxed but are obligated to enforce certain health dept rules. It takes a bit of delicate balancing to keep the free spirits from offending the more traditional guests. Good, bad and kookie, we love them all.
@chuck2 (183)
• Philippines
29 Jun 10
For me, I am not so very comfortable in staying other houses. I just feel so shy and I can't sleep very well that's why i can't stay longer i just leave and go home.
@roberten (3131)
• United States
29 Jun 10
The old adage: "you can never go home again" applies here. I really understand your feelings because I too am somewhat shy in an unfamiliar setting.
@Compy91 (49)
• India
29 Jun 10
Actually speaking i don't feel comfortable in any other place in the world than my own home.
@roberten (3131)
• United States
29 Jun 10
...more reason to be on your best behavior because you generally get what you give. A kind word, an act of kindness or respect has a way of paving the road of life and allowing one to have a more trouble-free journey.
@cher913 (25890)
• Canada
28 Jun 10
it depends on whose house i am staying and what the reason is for me staying but i generally try to feel comfortable when i am staying somewhere.
@roberten (3131)
• United States
29 Jun 10
Being comfortable and feeling relaxed and welcomed is the key, with a healthy dose of respect and decorum. For me, there is no place like home, so I try to follow the golden rule when I am some place else. I really try to exercise this rule when others do not, it sometimes encourages them to follow my example; education is enlightenment, which is a beautiful thing. Most of all, I try to appreciate whatever comes my way because I know it could always be a lot worse.
@sunsham68 (1378)
• India
28 Jun 10
oh no i dont behave this way at all, i really respect rules and boundaries, and am very uncomfortable letting my hair down in public both for my own modesty and principles and also for respecting others' sensibilities...its sad that people can be so disrespectful and inconsiderate!!
@roberten (3131)
• United States
28 Jun 10
It is sad, especially when they are insulted that you ask them to adorn proper street attire when in the front office and lobby. I would think that they would want to be properly dressed when in such a public area. It takes all kinds to make a world.
• Singapore
28 Jun 10
Whereever people are, they should just show basic respect. Is it respectful to show off your underwear or p.j to total strangers in a public place? Maybe you should set some rules, I think especially for the furniture. I suppose they brought them out and do not bring them back?
@roberten (3131)
• United States
28 Jun 10
No, it is very disrespectful to show your unmentionables in public; they term them house clothes and underwear for a reason. We have posted rules and explained polices yet the disrespectful behavior continues. We must accept some blame because some front desk personnel will turn a blind eye to bad behavior so as not to get into a comfrontation. This is not stuff we just make up but are required to adhere to per health department mandate. I do not know what more we can do save bolting and chaining down the room furniture too. Some guest leave the chairs outside, even in the rain. I sometimes envision them visiting some person they know and then dragging their livingroom furniture out into the front yard right after arriving; or worse, someone doing that at their home.
@xeroeight (1061)
• Philippines
28 Jun 10
yes I don't usually feel different when I am staying on other houses or hotel and other places I just follow their house rules and do my thing on my own
@roberten (3131)
• United States
28 Jun 10
Aha! The keywords are: ",,,I just follow their house rules,,,, We have rules that are clearly posted and yet the relaxed behavior continues. I am preplexed! Thank you for being thoughtful of others, it means more than you know.