What is best way to handle my 5 Years old Tantrums
By cairalyssa
@cairalyssa (1402)
Malaysia
May 8, 2011 2:57pm CST
Happy Mother's Day to all mothers!!!
I am single mother, and i consider myself learning, everyday to be a better mother despite what ever obstacles..
i have this big problem that make me so stressed out.. i am being fair with my exhusband by not fighting over child custody even we are friend until now.. i know somehow, child custody issue will come out when one of us remarried again. Now he wanna take her to UK which is like at another part of the world from where im staying, and fight over child custody.
i dunno what he said to her, now she's having terrible tantrums and i dunno how to handle.. it make me feels bad that i cant take control of this situation. I dont wanna lay my hand on her since i feel so much guilty on her for the divorce.. and i am so scared of loosing her..
If anyone could suggest me how do to handle this issue.. I really need advice here..
1 person likes this
7 responses
@allknowing (130077)
• India
9 May 11
A child normally cannot sustain any kind of mood for long and that includes getting into tantrums. You could leave her alone when she has those tantrums and try and win her over when all is calm. You can do wonders with her when she is in a good mood.
@allknowing (130077)
• India
10 May 11
Your dealing with her should have a sustaining effect which will leave no room for her to get into tantrums.
@cairalyssa (1402)
• Malaysia
9 May 11
that's true, that is what i do, i just leave her alone, but every time, she is repeating the same thing again. Sometimes i finds it funny, she start to scream at a chair because she hit on it and got her hurt.. but i really think that kind of attitude have to go away..
@smashville14 (278)
• Philippines
9 May 11
hey Happy Mother's Day my friend... I didn't know you are a single parent. Anyway, temper tantrums usually are being displayed by toddlers but in your case, your child is 5 years old already and her tantrums might be an extension. As a Nurse, we manage tantrums of a child by ignoring their behavior, meaning let the child burst out her angst in one corner but without leaving away from the child. The child usually is trying to control you by her behavior. If you bite their tantrums then they would know how to control you. So just ignore the child's behavior, but make sure she is in a corner where she can't hurt herself. You have to stretch your patience there coz she's gonna shout, cry and do anything unusual to get your attention. In a few minutes or more, she's gonna get tired and that's the time, you gave her your warmest hug and kisses and re-assure her that you love her so much.
@cairalyssa (1402)
• Malaysia
9 May 11
thanx smashville,
even she only show this attitude at home, but she is so clever with using it to get what she wants i.e: when i force her to bed, when i ask her to clean up her mess. Yeah i started to think she can take control of me because im her mother.. and she only do this to me and her dad, not to anyone else..
@smashville14 (278)
• Philippines
10 May 11
well every kid has a their way of getting into their parents. As a parent myself and even though I can firmly ignore the behavior of my kids when they're having their tantrums, there are really moments that I willingly submit to their 'manipulative' actions because...well, I just can't help it either, they're my kids and..they're so cute when they cry, hehe... it's like the face of Puss (the cat in the movie Shrek when Puss starts to beg, lol)
@barehugs (8973)
• Canada
8 May 11
Its very easy to regain control of your 5 yr old. Next time she begins a tantrum, you begin to have a tantrum too. You can sing loudly, or turn up the TV. Just try to make as much noise as your daughter. Soon she will tire,(having a tantrum is very hard work) when she stops, you can stop too. Then go ahead doing what you were when she started. Do not give in to her wants. She will then stop the tantrums!
@cairalyssa (1402)
• Malaysia
9 May 11
heheeee.. dats a good one.. i like this trick, i will lock myself in my room too, and pretend like im crying.. Work all the time, because she feel bad to make me sad. but im afraid this might develop bad effect to her, wat do u think?
having to be angry is really not easy!! i hate to raise my voice in the morning, but looks like i need to train myself on that.. :)
@ssebrinatw (175)
• United States
9 May 11
I think it depends on the situation but one thing I do know. Don't give in. If you give in to the tantrums they don't learn. I would put my kids in time out when they tantrumed. I would stand them in a corner and make them stay there for a minute or two. They would stop because they didn't like standing with their nose in the corner. If we were in a store, I would still make them do it. If it was really bad, I'd walk out of the store with them so other shoppers didn't have to suffer. They do learn and they do respect you if you discipline them.
@cairalyssa (1402)
• Malaysia
9 May 11
Lucky she dont gimme problem on public or when there are "outsider" to her around. She is well behave in public, infact her teacher makes her class monitor in her pre school class.. i know this tantrums is only a way for her to make me give all attention to her.. But sometimes it giving me hard time having to think of work with her screaming for no reason.. She knew its not reasonable to angry when her favourite tv show ends, but she just do it so i will come attend to her..so that's what i do most of the time.. really require lots of patience.. how can i make my princess understand, mummy gotta work for her..
@grazmaniandevil (379)
•
9 May 11
As a nursing student, we also handle tantrums during our lectures in child development. In your case, the best way to handle it is to give your child "Time-out". By placing your child in the corner and tell him to stay there and not move until he/she is told to (of course in a authoritative manner & tone). Once your child calms down, you can praise him/her after and explain to your child what he/she did was wrong. I saw this on Oprah too wherein they had a video log on the success of their time-outs. I know you can do this :) and btw, Happy mother's day!
@orang13 (723)
• Philippines
8 May 11
Try to have a heart to heart talk to her. Explain to her everything. Tell her how much she mean to you, tell her how much you love her and that you really don't wanna lose her! Ofcourse a five year old may seem like young but don't treat her that much. Now that she is suffering from your divorce maybe a little open up would help.
I hope it will help.
P.S. Im still not a mom though, just learn it from class 
