Marraige - What should be considered before marriage?

Actually, I think you are doing the right thing in planning and not rushing. My husband and I lived together for three years before he proposed and knew each other for a long time before. If it helps, I too had two major events; wedding and a I was 3 months pregnant. When you do feel it's the right time, may I suggest a book that truly helped me; How to Have an Elegant Wedding under $5,000 and it's quite practical and easy to find. Where? Library is a great place to start. I say this because when you say the word 'marriage' or 'wedding', $$$$ signs aren't far behind. So with that in mind and depending on where you want the blessed event, try for an off-month such as March or perhaps Mid-fall if you can get in early enough and go for something on Friday (better chance) or perhaps a Sunday. We did and it saved us a bundle. Look ahead and see if there are any major events coming up that you need to be aware of. The other big item is the dress. How elegant or simple do you want it? White or ivory? I will confess, I did go to David's Bridal and although I liked some of the dresses there, they weren't really me. Itn did do one thing for me, its a good place to give yourself an idea of what you are looking for. Try a smaller local shop that comes recommended and perhaps, try TheKnot.com for some ideas. Music? Library once again and perhaps create your own cd. Ideas? I love Celtic Woman but see what they have that strikes you both. Flowers? Depending on the season, try the arts and crafts store or wholesalers as you can be really creative here. You don't have to spend thousands of dollars on a wedding but you should put some $$ towards what matters such as the photography, flowers, and the dress or whatever you and your fiancee feel to be most important. If you're thinking of gifts, perhaps this may be a good time to appropriately ask for $ that you can use for a down payment on a house. Another is perhaps have some people volunteer their time so when you do move, you can have a team put together. I hope I didn't overwhelm you as you do sound like you have a really good head on your shoulders (YAY!) but you've the possibility two major events that you will need help with. Just be creative and realistic. You can still have fun and the time of your life! PS--don't forget TLC as they have some good ideas too. Take notes and use elements that will work for what you want. Enjoy!

Well it looks like you two are being smart about it. Being engaged should be seen as a promise to get married, but many people think of it as the time to start planning a wedding and everything. Marriage is a huge step, in my opinion there is no rush. Nothing bad is going to happen if you wait, only good things can come of it. By the time you get married you will know so much about eachother already and will have such a strong bond. It is good to consider things like money. Not that money is everything but weddings will require some money, and of course save for a honeymoon, and a downpayment on a house and stuff. I'm sure you'll have time to do that!

Think of it this way - marriage is much like buying a car. You choose the style and color you like, and the you go for a test drive. Try out the radio and the brakes etc, and see how it runs. Remember that with a car, you will only keep it for under 10 years and then trade it for a newer model. Now its time to take you future spouse for a trial run. Live with him/her for a period of time. How does he/she perform in bed? Does he get good mileage? Is he/ she a good worker, etc. Remember that unlike a car you will keep your spouse for a lifetime.

Hi Angelee, Seems like you two are mentally aware of what it does take to be in a marriage. I am glad as so many young couples plunge in without discussing all the dynamics of what it really takes to be married. Though I do not expect anyone to be me, my boyfriend and I live together for 6 almost 7 years. We are not engaged and or have any discussions about marriage. We do live as if we are though, as we are very committed to one another and consider ourselves to be one. It is hard for me to answer what will it take, as I mentioned that neither one of us discusses marriage over here. Not because we do not want it but more because we both have been married once before to other spouses. Therefore, we find that when the time and if it is right we will, I suppose. What I consider before getting married, I can only answer for you which will be being mentally, spiritually and financially ready to commit to each other. You are quite young therefore, you do have plenty of time to take your time in getting ready for the big day.

Hi Angel I think you have stated your case very well. Being married is so much more than living together and spending time together. When you are married everything falls on your shoulders. Living with mom and dad is no real way to start married life. Standing on your own and showing the world you are independent and all grown up is a good way to start a marriage. My grandson got married when he was 19 and his wife is in university. They probably shouldn't be married because they are always broke and need to bum money for power and rent and so forth. She only has 2 more years until she gets her degree, so it's very hard on them. They do live on their own and often get threatened with eviction. They probably should have waited until she got her teacher's credentials and started working before they married. She doesn't work and he works for a grocery store. They love each other but sometimes live isn't enough to tie the knot.

Well, I am not out to condemn anyone but I don't beleive in living together before the nuptisl bond is tied. Marriage is honourable, the bed undefiled.

I am engaged with my boyfriend too, and I have a ring, although we're not even thinking about setting a date yet because I am a student and also trying to lose weight, and I know that I will need at least a year before I can get into my dream dress. Also, we need to save up a lot of cash, as I am saving up for a house at the moment and he is saving up for a car, so we don't have the money for a wedding at the moment. We will probably get married around 2014, as that gives us a couple of years in order to save up and get our lives in order.

First off, congratulations on your engagement. Any couple in-love always feel that they are ready to get married. I've been there and done that --- twice! My first marriage didn't work and one of the reasons were I didn't think about how really ready we were financially. Problems about money could change something in marriage so be ready for that. His debts will be yours as well. You need to consider each other's expenses and talk about what to buy first and what not, or what could wait. Both of you need to compromise or commit to whatever is important to both of you, be able to trust and respect each other's decisions, and as much as possible avoid fighting over something less important than your relationship. To have children of your own is another challenge so make sure you're really ready for that as well as attention to the baby and to the husband should be given equally as much as possible. I'm no expert but my second marriage is still going strong because I've learned a lot from my first. Goodluck and enjoy looking forward to your future together.

There are a lot of factors you have to consider before you are getting married. Finance. Do you think you that you both have a stable finance to provide for each other. Like you mentioned above, you will not want to live with the parents forever, or under their roof. You have to rent a place or buy a place for your own right? Food and utility bill, and also when you have baby, that is a big step for stable financial security too. Also, you have consider after married, you both have to be responsible, and everything will not that easy as you think, like, what if argument happen. How would you both solve it peacefully. Would you both consider separate apart when a heat argument occurs. That just my idea.

Wow congrats for your engagement finally you are doing marriage and after some days you will start your new beautiful life. Friend I will suggest my all mylotter friends nothing should be considered before marriage because if after marriage it is not completed then we feel upset or nervous. This is my own experience. Whenever my friends was asked me how should be your husband I say husband may be any type but at least they have one sister so I can share my happy and sad moment with her. But now my husband is so good but he has no sister only two brothers. So I am so upset no girl friend with me.

I think a lot of things should be considered before getting marry. I have to say that, unfortunately, I have never found someone that I could spend the rest of my life with. The first thing to be considered, in my opinion, is to see if you really love that person and if you are able to handle with all his little defects for the rest of your life. The second is to see if the couple is able to pay for their own bills and other stuffs. That's very important, because money is the reason of a lot fights between many couples.

First of all congrate to should getting engagement with your boy friends.Every one person has feel same expressions and emotion with his/her which express you in your statement.Before i am not agree with type of relationships possible limit.Marriage legal contract from life together as a wife and husband.It is a base of a family and running the world in smooth direction is a necessary part of life. God might help you in every matter of life in the future.

Congratulations on your engagement! It's good to know that you are still very much in love with each other. Well, don't rush marriage. It's best that you are thinking about saving up in the future for your fiance and your family. It's also good to live separately from your parents' home when you two decided to get married. Marriage is a long term commitment and therefore should be agreed spiritually by both parties. God bless!