She's ignoring me; so I'm ignoring her!

@911Ricki (13602)
Canada
August 15, 2012 8:57pm CST
I had sent a friend a facebook message about going out, I didnt hear anything. So I just say much as I've been working. I sent her another thinking maybe she's busy as she started a new job not too long ago. I sent her another as another friend asked if both of us wanted to go for coffee. Haven't heard anything back, so I told this other friend. She sent a message, and then she checked this friend facebook (as she had her password). She had checked and deleted the messages we had sent. This other friend told me to confront her, and I said no I'm just going to ignore her. I dont recall saying or doing anything to her, as she gave me a good reference for my work a week or so ago. But otherwise shes ignoring us for some reason, I just dont think its worth my time.
4 people like this
12 responses
@louievill (18643)
• Philippines
16 Aug 12
hi, just would like to ask if you did anything in a way that would make her feel that your are making romantic advances? Just asking cause some girls react that way when they sense you are showing just too much interest in them ( I said some and I'm not generalizing women). Ignoring her is one move that might make her open up but whatever it is know the reason, she might have a jealous boyfriend, strict parents or something...
@911Ricki (13602)
• Canada
16 Aug 12
Be a little odd since Im female, and shes female. I dont swing that way, so no I didnt make any advances on her.
16 Aug 12
I get similar things like this quite a number of times with a few people, most noticably with one of my friends I've known for nearly 18 years (I'm 21 so thats a long time) I'll text or ring him and get nothing, then out of nowhere I get a phonecall saying wanna meet up and we do, it can be annoying but I'm used to it, plus we both work and he is in a serious relationship so I've learned to live with the fact that he doesn't always get back to me. ANd I have this female friend who does pretty much the same thing but we aren't as close, just its just how some people are :/
@cutepenguin (6457)
• Canada
16 Aug 12
I don't think it's worth your time to worry about it. Maybe she has a reasonable reason - going through a rough time, family problem, or maybe she doesn't, but you can only control what you do in the situation, and it's easiest on you if you just leave her be until she comes back to you.
@lynboobsy11 (11346)
• Philippines
16 Aug 12
I will do the same thing, sometimes when It happens to me and ignoring me I thought things that I done to her why she is ignoring me. But since I've done nothing it's not my fault and I'm not the one who has a problem.
@chookie1971 (2277)
• Australia
16 Aug 12
some times if people ignore you then it is not worth your time chasing after them. I strongly believe that friendship should be equal. Basically one to one. How you explained it, was you were giving her a 3 and you were getting zero. Not really an equal balance. If she doesn't give you a small amount of time, just to at least respond, then don't give her the time of day. Last week, (6 days ago) I told a friend/neighbour my thoughts on a problem that arose between us. Basically I told her if she can see my side having merrit then we can sort this problem out. If not, I would not bother her any more. This was over me telling her I had a family function on at the weekend. She replied that she wished I had told her sooner. I told her what an idiot I was because I though we were in september but never heard back from her from her. Three days later, I do get a text message saying I had a family function. On the day of the plans we were suppose to have, she replied. She continued to stand by what she said. Finally I replied back asking her question by asking her if she knew of her plans before I told her of mine. And then why didn't she tell me when she was making them as either my husband or I would have been driving her to the venue we were going to be at together. I just felt that she assumed I would be going when she made plans. Well any way, I have been waiting for her answers, but haven't heard from her for 6 days. If she can't talk to me about the problem that was created then she isn't worth my time. I do have other friends who have consideration to ask me if I am going to a venue.
@SomeCowgirl (32270)
• United States
16 Aug 12
Yeah I think I'd ignore her to. It's odd that your friend didn't change her password if she was trying to ignore you both and she must've known the other friend had her facebook login.. Odd.. but still oh well.
• Philippines
16 Aug 12
Maybe she has a serious problem right now and don't want to be bothered. There are times especially for women that they just want to be left alone. Maybe she feels that way these days. If she's a close friend, maybe you can ask her some other time. Or you can even send her inspirational quotes to brighten up her day. As you told that she gave you a good reference, maybe she's busy. Give her the benefit of the doubt.
@ElicBxn (60884)
• United States
16 Aug 12
I think its time for this other friend to change her password!
• United States
16 Aug 12
I would do the very same thing you are doing now. She may be mad about something you have nothing to do with. It woudl be nice to just say no she can't make it than to just ignore you.
@knicnax (2234)
• Philippines
16 Aug 12
wow. yeah, just ignore her. If she thought you were worth it then she would have told you why she can't or she wouldn't have deleted your messages. Though there is a possibility that someone else deleted the message and the message never got to your friend. If your other friend has access to her account, then maybe her other friends also have access.
@Raine38 (9117)
• United States
16 Aug 12
Yeah well, it's her loss not yours. At least you've done your part and given her ample benefit of the doubt. The rest is up to her. Whatever's going on in her mind about her friendship with you, only she can do something about it since she refused to reach out to you. It's no biggie. Let her harbor whatever it is that she's harboring. Eventually, she will be stressed about it while you're just cool. If she have issues with you and she won't talk to resolve it, then that's her problem. You're ok with her and that's that.
@Hatley (164654)
• Garden Grove, California
16 Aug 12
hi ricki sounds like she is playing games with you and I think you are right. since you did nothing to her, best just to ignore her since she deleted your message. I have no idea why she is ignoring you but you are right its not worth worrying about it. if she wants to get together let her come to you for a change. lol