Encouraging a child to do good

@namiya (1599)
Philippines
September 6, 2012 6:56am CST
How would you encourage a child to do good without bribing him as habitual bribing for his every achievement may create a wrong concept on "why he need to do good things."
1 person likes this
8 responses
@roshigo58 (4871)
• Pune, India
27 Mar 13
Hi, We should encourage our children for going good things in life. When they do something nicely we give them reward and if they behave badly we punish them. So children can understand what is wrong and what is right. We should not give every time something as a bribe. So the children may become selfish. Only pat on their back is also can encourage children. So we have to teach our children very tactfully.
@namiya (1599)
• Philippines
28 Mar 13
Proper acknowledgment and praises for their accomplishment would make them feel better realizing that their efforts are appreciated and recognized. This doesn't mean however that material reward is a "no no" but that making it a regular practice as motivation for the kid to be good most of the time may instill misdirected notion in the mind of a child.
@chum24 (569)
• Philippines
20 Mar 13
hi..!!! how old is your child? as child grows up they have a milestone to do. just be a good example to your child i know he will better things.
@namiya (1599)
• Philippines
20 Mar 13
My children are now all adults and with the grace of God they are not giving me headaches. I just started this discussion months ago due to some observations on how some people I know would encourage their kids to accomplish or do something good through material rewards.
@roshigo58 (4871)
• Pune, India
29 Sep 12
Hi, My son is 23 years old. My wife and I always encouraged him to do good things. And now he is very good human being. He always care for us. He is our only son. He is not staying with us due to his job. But he is always worrying about us. He always respect his grandparents also. Really I am proud of my son.
@namiya (1599)
• Philippines
20 Mar 13
This response was late due to absence of notification and I know that you and your wife are now staying with your son. It really is so nice that your son had made a way that you now live together as a family.
@KrauseHome (34994)
• United States
15 Sep 12
Personally I feel bribing a child is Wrong as in he will come to expect that, and only do things when bribed. I feel finding good ways to encourage a child to do things like rewarding them when they do something with words of Praise and sometimes offering them something special only once the task is done helps show them how important they are, and you are thankful for what they are doing.
@namiya (1599)
• Philippines
20 Mar 13
I agree with you that once a child is used to this practice, he may adapt a notion that doing or accomplishing something should be rewarded and thus may miss out the essence of self worth for achieving something.
• Philippines
8 Sep 12
We can also encourage them by being a good example of being good. A child imitates what he sees in the people who influences him the most, that's his parents :D So it means that parents should do what they say so that children will do the same thing.
@namiya (1599)
• Philippines
12 Sep 12
yes being a good example for your child is the most effective encouragement.
• India
7 Sep 12
Hi friend, As a parent it is our duty to guide our kids in a good way and encourage them to do good things, we can tell the benefits of doing good things and the result of the thing, it will motivate them to do it.
@namiya (1599)
• Philippines
7 Sep 12
yes as parents we influence them most in life and if we want them to be good then we should help them understand the how and why of being one.
@WakeUpKitty (8707)
• Netherlands
6 Sep 12
I don't. All of my kids are good the only thing they forget is to take care of themselves first. I want them to do themselves good first before they think of others or help out others. I want them to ignore all those complaining, selfish people who say kids are no good and they never are good enough, which makes my son say "sorry" every 10 min. I also don't want them to say "sorry" as soon as somebody else is in a bad mood or not able to understand them. I also don't want them always to be understandable awards other people since nobody is that to them if it comes to. Most kids are helpfull and attentive, it's easy to encourage them if you give them a compliment but there is an end to/stop for everything. It also depends on the age. There is nothing wrong with thinking at yourself first (normal for little kids and something most people don't do which makes them sick and unhappy and visit the shrink). If you can't take care of yourself first, help yourself first, think about your own welfare first, say stop and no first it's useless to do good to others.
@namiya (1599)
• Philippines
7 Sep 12
you have a point. everything have to start form oneself first before you could extend or share it with others. the way you brought up your children I think they are responsible ones whose decisions and outlook in life are mature than children of their age.
• United States
6 Sep 12
Rewarding good behavior is the best way to encourage a child to do good, but rewards don't have to be monetary compensation. You can reward a child with a compliment on doing good. You can reward them with a display of affection. Just like its important to discipline a child when they misbehave, its also important to use positive reinforcement when they are good.
@namiya (1599)
• Philippines
7 Sep 12
thank you for these very nice suggestions philly. yest it would be en effective motivation for a child if he realizes that people around him are proud of him for his achievements.