What Cool off means ?

Philippines
November 21, 2012 7:12pm CST
Hello my lotters,good morning I have a topic to discuss .My friend is almost a year in relation with her BF. recently her BF proposed her for a Cool off due for some reasons watsoever. She confided me telling all her ordeal with all the pain i could see in her eyes. she asked my opinion if cool off could be breakup...coz as she noticed her BF is hoping her to look for a better guy for her. and that made her confused coz despite shes still hoping that cool off is just a temporary, just to give them both a break. I believe cool off is 50/50 chances, that they can be back to normal while break up is setting them free . What can u say? me too was confused about cool off and break up. any opinion? thanks to mylot
16 responses
@artemeis (4070)
• China
24 Nov 12
What do you think? Sorry and I mean it, since you know the whole entire story but did not tell us in your post here. In such a situation, I believe most of us are all second guessing for your friend and you which I am really not keen to because it could swing either way and worse give a bad opinion and advice. I can understand the frustrations but it will be equally frustrating to do second guessing when you are posting back questions to us at the end of the day.
• Philippines
27 Nov 12
thank you guys for all the responses you made . It really serves a big enlightenment to my friend,I'm sure that in some way it could help her accept and decide what is best for her. Thanx to my mylot God Bless everyone and have a nice day..
• Philippines
22 Nov 12
Maybe your friend should ask his boyfriend what does he mean by cool off. Because generally, cool off means having temporary space or break from a relationship. But the way his BF talks about the matter, maybe he's just covering it up, sugar-coating the break up with "cool off." Sorry for being a little too judgmental. But in order for them to really understand each other, your friend should be the one asking his guy what he really wants out of their relationship. She will avoid getting confused if she'll ask the person concern directly. :)
@zandi458 (27952)
• Malaysia
22 Nov 12
Yes asking is one good thing but most men won't tell the truth because some men are sensitive to tears. Definitely if he tells him that he wants to break off for some reasons she might breakdown in front of him which I think he is trying to avoid.
@zionl0l (68)
• Philippines
22 Nov 12
for me cool off is the stage that you two are thinking if you really deserve each other.. these are the time that you think if you should go on with the relationship or just stop.. well i hope their cool off wont last too long..
@zandi458 (27952)
• Malaysia
22 Nov 12
When a man tells a woman that he wants to cool off their relationship it is indicating that he wants to break off. Either he has found a new girlfriend or he no longer feel the spark in their relationship. This is a gentleman way of ending a relationship. If I am told such words I would not pursue as man does not utter such words if he truly love the woman. He will grip her hsnd and won't let go. But once he has fallen out of love he care less and his attitudes is only heart breaking.
@gaiza12 (4889)
• Philippines
22 Nov 12
Like what most has said, cool off is a time for both couples to have space. Be free of each other of a few days or months or whatever they have decided upon. It a time for the 2 to find time for themselves. Some couples on cool off do find their ways back, and others don't. It's really a 50/50 depending on what the other has realized from the time they were away. Try to ask your friend to talk to his bf after some time. Maybe her bf only wants some time alone to think things through. Let's hope whatever the decision of the 2 will be best for both of them.
@wahwee20 (66)
• Philippines
22 Nov 12
Cool off means, giving each others space, a time to think if what they really want for each other, either to stay together or better off as friends. And that is depending on what both of them would realizes soon and decided if what would they become after cool off. I wish that they'll still end-up together. Just always bear with her and keep tell her that whatever the outcome of this, whether its good or not, just pray..
@sharone74 (4839)
• United States
22 Nov 12
He means that he wants to cool off the hot and heavy relationship and take a break, as in sowing his oats elsewhere looking for Mrs. Right. If they are meant to be together they will end up together no matter what happens, and if they are not meant to be then no amount of wringing and twisiting is going to make them perfect for each other and they are best off to go their separate ways. Is there a specific reason for the break up? Hsve they spent an extended time apart or traveling? Is there someone else for either of them? These are things you cannot truly know unless you are them. Just support your friend no matter how it comes out.
@jeztrose (1405)
• Philippines
22 Nov 12
For me as i understand,the meaning of cool off means spacing out for a while,Giving time for each other to think about things.But Yes it would have 50-50 chances because by that time if one realizes that things won't work out well then break up will follow.
• Philippines
22 Nov 12
A cool off means taking a break. It gives you time to be separated and think about things. It avoids heat and friction between you two. Sometimes, it's better because it gets you to realize what you REALLY want. Usually, this works for couples. I hope my comment helped. I hope you're friends get back together.
@valerievy (162)
• Guam
22 Nov 12
I think your friend should pretty much assume that cool off will lead to break up. I don't think that couples should have a cool off period. Instead they should work out their issues and talk about what is bothering one another to even consider a cool off. Think of it this way, when you get married, there's no such thing as a real cool off period because you're legally wed-locked.
@Angelpink (4022)
• Philippines
22 Nov 12
Hello there ! Cool off means a space between two lovers or partners . Space means they need a break from each other, break from all the things that they shared together that includes the communication and the physical presence . One ask for this because maybe relationship becomes suffocating , boring or might be one side wants to measure his attachment to the other. This is also a test as to how deep , sincere and committed they are to each other. Cooling off is just a phase , they might be back or not to each other's arm. As the saying goes , if you love someone set him free , if he comes back , he is yours if not then you are not meant for each other. All the best for your friend.
@aejey322 (1006)
• Philippines
22 Nov 12
In my understanding cool off is just a temporary status of not seeing each other or giving each other space and time to think and rest. Normally cooling off happens when there is a heated situation like quarels and the couple decides to give time to each other to keep away from the pressures. And also giving each other time to think if it is still worth to go on or better give up the relationship. There are partners who at the time of being away from each other realize their mistakes and learn lessons from it, and decides to continue their relationship and improve it. But there are also couples who realizes that it is better to let go because they are not compatible, and it will not be healthy for them to be together. But as to your friend's situation, tell her to ask her bf if he is already trying to propose a breakup. Because definitely it will really cause confusion to the way he acts and the way he tells her to find another man. They should have a clear understanding on their status so they can accept and agree on something.
• Philippines
22 Nov 12
Cool off is a polite word to say I'm fallen out of love or in other words break up. Many people think that cool off means giving some space, but it's not really what it is. If you sincerely love some one you don't have to reach this point of cool off thing but you will work together to make your relationship better. I think your friend needs to move on.
@jenny1015 (13389)
• Philippines
22 Nov 12
Cooling off from a relationship means giving time for each other to have some time alone to think about the relationship, if you would really want to continue having one another or otherwise. Sometimes this stage moves on to break ups when one or both realizes that they are better off as friends.
22 Nov 12
Dear friend,try to find a new good polite BF for your friend.May be its help her to become a normal.After that she will be okay and she will forget the past with her new life or Take her to away.If her thinking it is temporary one try to contact her boy friend and conform it.that's my opinion .
@edvc77 (2143)
• Philippines
22 Nov 12
I think cool off means one has no commitment for a time unless break up means totally no commitment with each other. In cool off there is a possibilty that the relationship will bloom again. Have a nice day!