I am stuck in the middle of a crossfire...
By topffer
@topffer (42156)
France
August 6, 2015 8:09am CST
...and it is not comfortable at all
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Two friends are engaged in a kind of flame war, and after trying to reconcile them, I have decided to remain neutral until the end of the conflict.
I am moving to Switzerland
.
Have you had friends tearing each other for pointless reasons (maybe not pointless for them, but from a distant view, they are. It reminds me a funny letter of Cicero. Never mind.)?
What have you done ?
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Two friends are engaged in a kind of flame war, and after trying to reconcile them, I have decided to remain neutral until the end of the conflict.
I am moving to Switzerland.
Have you had friends tearing each other for pointless reasons (maybe not pointless for them, but from a distant view, they are. It reminds me a funny letter of Cicero. Never mind.)?
What have you done ?10 people like this
11 responses
@GardenGerty (157563)
• United States
6 Aug 15
I tend to withdraw from the battle field and hope I am not asked to choose sides.
6 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
6 Aug 15
I remember the old days on the lot when flame wars erupted like acne on a 14 year old! I stayed out of them unless a user messaged me for help. I must have been effective because in the end the warring parties ceased fire and ended up on my friends list! I really hope this new site doesn't descend to previous levels of nastiness........
4 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
6 Aug 15
@topffer We have a federal election coming up in October, but frankly, NO ONE could be diplomatic enough to solve the problems between our ruling parties....
3 people like this
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@much2say (53958)
• Los Angeles, California
6 Aug 15
Oh my! If it's not your battle to fight, then let them deal with it amongst themselves! My friends can be stubborn and they most likely won't listen to "reason" anyway. I used to try to help friends, but now I cannot deal with their messes. Step away from the crossfire - step away . . .
3 people like this
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@thesids (22180)
• Bhubaneswar, India
6 Aug 15
Heck!!! This is quite painful. I recall an incident here - Dec 31st and it involved one of the senior most MyLotters (you know whom I am referring to). There was one who probably got over drunk and started abusing and fighting on a discussion with her. Painful definitely.
And now on your version you have two friends... That must be more hurting. The only thing that can be done is - leave them to fight. They will get over with it, eventually, but you would be worried and more concerned and hurt if you keep track of how they fought over. My advice, better stay out of it and even away from the arena where they are getting issues resolved.
2 people like this
@thesids (22180)
• Bhubaneswar, India
6 Aug 15
@topffer Definitely a healthy decision. 
At the end of the war, if they reunite (as friends normally do), they will forget the hurt they spread and start laughing over their "behaviors" during the war. And you would realize that the worry, hurt and pain you went through during that war resulted in nothing better.
On the other hand, if they split after the war, they will forget each other, move on, but you would keep feeling bad that maybe you could have saved their friendship...
Either way you look at it, it is a loss and pain at the end.
At the end of the war, if they reunite (as friends normally do), they will forget the hurt they spread and start laughing over their "behaviors" during the war. And you would realize that the worry, hurt and pain you went through during that war resulted in nothing better.
On the other hand, if they split after the war, they will forget each other, move on, but you would keep feeling bad that maybe you could have saved their friendship...
Either way you look at it, it is a loss and pain at the end.1 person likes this
@topffer (42156)
• France
6 Aug 15
I remember what you are speaking about. I tried to obtain a ceasefire from both sides, but the belligerents don't want of a ceasefire. I have decided to move in a neutral country until the end of the war. I should have better stayed out since the beginning instead of trying to help. I hope that they will realize that their war is like many wars : stupid.
1 person likes this
@LovingMyBabies (85127)
• Valdosta, Georgia
6 Aug 15
I so try to defend people who I think are right but when it gets out of hand I slowly back away...
3 people like this
Anyway, I can't say...at least, not until you answer me first! 
@bagarad (14283)
• Paso Robles, California
7 Aug 15
It all depends upon whether the war is on or off the internet and the level of friendship that has been reached. I tend to be a peacemaker, if possible, in the real world. In the virtual world I would stay out of it unless one person is acting as a troll. But I tend not to be a friend of trolls, so in that case they would not both be my friends and I'd block the troll and advise the friend who was attacked to do likewise.
1 person likes this
@topffer (42156)
• France
7 Aug 15
It depends of the kind of troll. If it is a flaming troll, I would report the animal. But some are funny, and I let them live their troll life. I have been friend with a troll here in the past, and I needed a lot of time to realize that it was a troll
. Yes, it is online, and these friends are not trolls. I also think that it is better to stay out until the end of the war.
. Yes, it is online, and these friends are not trolls. I also think that it is better to stay out until the end of the war.1 person likes this
