Are you nervous of having a baby boy or girl?

@kaka135 (13286)
Malaysia
December 3, 2015 3:14am CST
A neighbor asked me this question when we went to the park last evening. At first I thought if she was asking me whether I am nervous for my pregnancy, I told her not really, as this is not my first time pregnancy. Then she clarified it, asked if I am nervous to know whether it's a baby boy or baby girl. A child is a special gift to me and my family, the gender really doesn't matter at all. I love both boy and girl. When she knew this, she thinks I am very courageous. I am not sure if she has any pressure from the family or it's just she has personal preference in the gender. I know many of my female friends like to have daughter, and some older generation would like to have grandson in the family. I am blessed not to have all these pressure or preference. I am always happy and grateful for having a child. Do you have any preferences on baby boy or girl?
12 people like this
13 responses
@LadyDuck (86278)
• Switzerland
3 Dec 15
For some families it is very important to have a baby boy because he will be the one to continue the family name. This is the case in many important families in my country.
3 people like this
@Missmwngi (9774)
• Nairobi, Kenya
3 Dec 15
It is the same here and when a woman already has 2/3 girls i guess it becomes normal for her to be nervous because she would want a boy already
2 people like this
@kaka135 (13286)
• Malaysia
7 Dec 15
This happens in some Chinese families too. That's why my mother wished I have a baby boy for my first pregnancy, though I told her my parents-in-law don't really mind on the gender.
2 people like this
4 Dec 15
I actually never imagined that I would give birth. I have been battling with endometriosis since 2007. My OB told me there was a possibility that I would not conceive. But, last year 2014, a miracle happened; I got pregnant with my first baby. I thought i would like to have a baby boy. Because now a days, rape happens anywhere, i don't want this to happen if i would have a baby girl. But only God knows what is best ; He sent a baby girl. And, I don't have any resentments because my husband was so happy - he prefers a baby girl.
2 people like this
@Elizaby (3065)
• Pensacola, Florida
6 Dec 15
many men do want a girl to be daddy's little princess.
1 person likes this
@kaka135 (13286)
• Malaysia
7 Dec 15
Yes, I think baby is a gift. Your husband must be very happy with his little princess.
@kaka135 (13286)
• Malaysia
7 Dec 15
@Elizaby Yes, I think that. Though my husband loves our son, he just seems gentler when he's with our little girl.
@srisahara (4110)
• Indonesia
4 Dec 15
When I am pregnant for my first baby, I am nervous of having a baby boy or girl. Evidently, I have a baby girl. But for my second pregnant, I feel I will having birth a baby boy, but, finally I have a baby girl again...
1 person likes this
@kaka135 (13286)
• Malaysia
7 Dec 15
So you have two girls now? I heard from some ladies, they can feel the gender of the baby. I never have this feeling, perhaps I didn't think much about it.
1 person likes this
@srisahara (4110)
• Indonesia
10 Dec 15
@kaka135 Yes, I have two girls, now...I also can't feel my baby is boy or girl...
1 person likes this
@kaka135 (13286)
• Malaysia
10 Dec 15
@srisahara Are you pregnant now? Congratulations!! How many months?
1 person likes this
@youless (78190)
• Guangzhou, China
4 Dec 15
When I was pregnant, I didn't care whether I would have a boy or girl. The most important is that my baby would be healthy. This is what I was concerned about. I remember when I had the ultra sound scanning, I used a mirror as I wanted to see my baby from the screen. As the screen was behind me and I couldn't see it at all. At first the doctor seemed to hesitate, then I realized why she would act so. Then I told her I just wanted to see my baby, I didn't want to know it's boy or girl. In China it is prohibited to tell parents whether you have a boy or girl when the woman is pregnant. I like both. I have no preferences on baby's gender.
1 person likes this
@kaka135 (13286)
• Malaysia
7 Dec 15
I didn't know that is prohibited in China. So, normally while doing ultrasound scan, you don't get to see the baby if you don't use a mirror? Here, we have two screens, one for me to see when I am lying down, another screen is with the machine where the doctor sees, so I don't need to turn my head and look at the screen.
1 person likes this
@youless (78190)
• Guangzhou, China
7 Dec 15
@kaka135 Yes, usually we can't see the screen when we have an ultrasound scan. This policy is to protect those women who carry with a baby girl. Due to One Child Policy in the past, some people chose to abort the baby when they were pregnant if they knew they had a baby girl.
@youless (78190)
• Guangzhou, China
7 Dec 15
@kaka135 Yes, usually we can't see the screen when we have an ultrasound scan. This policy is to protect those women who carry with a baby girl. Due to One Child Policy in the past, some people chose to abort the baby when they were pregnant if they knew they had a baby girl.
1 person likes this
@much2say (29166)
• United States
3 Dec 15
We wanted 2 kids - and that's what we got! The first happened to be a girl, and the second happened to be a boy. It's interesting how many people tell us we are blessed to have one of each - but really gender was never on our minds - we wanted 2 healthy and happy kids! But we do know families that have all girls or all boys and they secretly (or not) wish for the next one to be what they are "missing".
1 person likes this
@kaka135 (13286)
• Malaysia
7 Dec 15
Many people tell us we are blessed too, as I have a boy and a girl. Now that I am pregnant, many people tell me it doesn't matter whether it's a baby boy or girl, since I already have both gender. Even the doctor said that. I can understand that, as some of my friends only have boys but wish for a girl.
1 person likes this
@much2say (29166)
• United States
7 Dec 15
@kaka135 I forgot to mention too that I know some families who are wishing for even one child (oh, such a heartbreaking story for some, they want to build a family so badly). We are fortunate to have our children!
1 person likes this
@kaka135 (13286)
• Malaysia
11 Dec 15
@much2say Yes, that's why I think we are very blessed to have our children, regardless what gender it is.
1 person likes this
@SIMPLYD (68974)
• Philippines
3 Dec 15
When i was pregnant with our daughter , there was no ultrasound yet to know the baby's gender . Thus , i though she was a he , because she kicks so forcefully . I don't particularly like a girl or a boy . What in prayed for is that the baby will be a healthy one .
1 person likes this
@kaka135 (13286)
• Malaysia
7 Dec 15
Yes, me too. I was and am always hoping for the baby to be healthy. That's the most important. Here, many elderly ladies can help to "predict" whether it's a boy or a girl by looking at the shape of the pregnant lady's tummy. Many said my second child must be a boy by looking at the shape, even though I told them, doctor told me it's a girl.
1 person likes this
@SIMPLYD (68974)
• Philippines
8 Dec 15
@kaka135 Some people really predict the gender that way . But still the ultrasound is more accurate of course .
1 person likes this
@kaka135 (13286)
• Malaysia
8 Dec 15
@SIMPLYD I guess some people have "developed" the way to predict the gender before the ultrasound was invented, so they have been following the method.
1 person likes this
@Missmwngi (9774)
• Nairobi, Kenya
3 Dec 15
I guess if i were to be pregnant again i would be nervous because i would wish to have the gender that i don't have already
1 person likes this
@kaka135 (13286)
• Malaysia
7 Dec 15
Yes, I can understand that. Some of my friends who only have boys always wish to have a girl.
1 person likes this
@Missmwngi (9774)
• Nairobi, Kenya
7 Dec 15
@kaka135 Mmmmh i guess it is a normal thing to want what you don't have
1 person likes this
• United States
13 Dec 15
I don't have kids, but I will be grateful and blessed for either gender. But the ideal is a boy and a girl.
1 person likes this
@kaka135 (13286)
• Malaysia
14 Dec 15
I guess many people would prefer a boy and a girl, and that's why many people think I am lucky as I already have a boy and a girl now. But yet, we are blessed for either gender.
• Philippines
7 Dec 15
For me, this is just my opinion, it wouldn't matter if it's a boy or girl. ( of course I gotta hunt for a daddy first, hello? where are you? Just kidding, of course, he's suppose to do the hunting, not me) . But it will vary per family, maybe the reasons they want a baby of another gender vary ( for example if the family has already boys but not girl yet, or vice versa). It all depends on the family, and their concerns.
1 person likes this
@kaka135 (13286)
• Malaysia
11 Dec 15
Yes, there are always some reasons for different families. Hope you will find your significant half soon.
• New Baltimore, Michigan
4 Dec 15
I was nervous about having kids period. That's why I didn't have any. But if I had to choose (which I don't)... I guess I'd rather have a boy. Little girls get on my nerves even more than little boys.
1 person likes this
@kaka135 (13286)
• Malaysia
7 Dec 15
Many of my friends prefer girls, as they think girls are gentler and more willing to help the mothers, but boys are too energetic and just like to play, though I do not agree.
• Canton, Michigan
3 Dec 15
Got over that feeling long time back. Did not like the suspense so got to know beforehand.
1 person likes this
@kaka135 (13286)
• Malaysia
7 Dec 15
I would like to know when the doctor can already tell me that, as it'll be easier for me to tell my children whether it's a baby sister or brother, and we will name the baby. I always started to call the baby in my womb by his or her name.
@marijuana (593)
• Tel Aviv, Israel
3 Dec 15
I would be excited to have either a baby boy or a baby girl :) either one gives immeasurable joy. But there are some country/culture where gender really matters and sadly some culture discriminate and restrict rights and freedom of women.
1 person likes this
@kaka135 (13286)
• Malaysia
7 Dec 15
Yes, besides personal preference, I think some women have pressure from the family as well. Some in-laws prefer boys.
@owlwings (36937)
• Cambridge, England
3 Dec 15
There are some cultures where the gender of a child is very significant and people are often very concerned that the child should be of one gender or the other. Your neighbour would, perhaps, be nervous about the gender of her own child and so projected her concern onto you. When you told her that you didn't mind one way or the other, she again related that to her own feelings and thought you "courageous" because, from her own point of view, it would seem to be. Even when the gender of a child is not important, parents often still like to know before the birth because they can then plan the colour of the layette or the decoration of the nursery or just what kind of presents to ask for from those wanting to greet the new baby suitably. There are even some people who like to put a child's name down for a particular school even before the baby is born!
1 person likes this
@kaka135 (13286)
• Malaysia
7 Dec 15
Yes, I think that too. We do like to know the gender before the birth, so we can always tell the children whether it's a baby brother or baby sister, and we can name the baby. I always call the baby by name when he or she is in my womb. I didn't know some already register the baby for school even before the baby is born.
1 person likes this