You would not Believe what I told my Pastor's wife!

This is me this morning. Pixabay public domain image.
@akalinus (14612)
United States
May 9, 2016 10:37am CST
Yesterday, I had a high fever. When I picked up the thermometer it went to 105 degrees F even before I put it in my mouth. It only goes up to 106. Anyway, here is the message I left on my pastor's wife's FB message page. Michelle, I'm sick. Fever. It started after the plane crash in the desert. They tied me to a camel because if could not walk. Then they said they would kill everybody so I made a big scene and they all got in these big jars. At least they had enough time. Don't know what to do now. I guess it does not matter what happens to me but so glad I gave them time to get away. She is probably rounding up someone to come and take me away because I am a lunatic. Did you ever do anything that crazy?
16 people like this
17 responses
@just4him (110170)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
9 May 16
You probably gave her a good laugh.
3 people like this
@akalinus (14612)
• United States
9 May 16
I am sure she will be teasing me about it and tell everyone in the Western world as well.
3 people like this
@just4him (110170)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
10 May 16
@akalinus It's good she has a sense of humor.
3 people like this
@DaddyEvil (23552)
• Aurora, Missouri
14 May 16
@akalinus Wait! You mean THAT was YOU, Jo Ann? I heard about that from my neighbor! She heard about it from the guy that bakes her cakes. He heard about it from his husband, the hairdresser and he heard about it from @just4him ! (I can't swear to it, but I think Valerie prefers to go to the uhm... alternate lifestyle hairdresser because he has such soft hands and he gives her make-up tips!) I guess you're right.... An awful lot of people seem to have already heard this story... I posted it in the national papers but everyone said they had heard it from your Pastor's wife! SMH!
1 person likes this
@marlina (71305)
• Canada
9 May 16
Very weird!
3 people like this
@akalinus (14612)
• United States
9 May 16
Yes, about the weirdest thing I ever did online.
1 person likes this
@UncleJoe (9482)
• Virginia Beach, Virginia
12 May 16
Not me. I'm the only sane person I know. Everybody else is crazy.
2 people like this
@akalinus (14612)
• United States
12 May 16
I used to wonder if I was the keeper of the asylum or an inmate.
2 people like this
@DaddyEvil (23552)
• Aurora, Missouri
15 May 16
@akalinus I guess you know, now! So......... how fast does that visitor's pass get you out of this place? *DE checks out his club and smiles!*
1 person likes this
@akalinus (14612)
• United States
15 May 16
@DaddyEvil Your answers are wicked.
1 person likes this
@much2say (38744)
• United States
9 May 16
Oh my - just where did that story come from? How did she reply back? Perhaps she thought you had more than just a fever ! Well I do hope you are feeling better now!
1 person likes this
@akalinus (14612)
• United States
9 May 16
The story was a delusion from the fever. She did not reply back, what on earth could she possibly say about it? Fever going up again.
2 people like this
@much2say (38744)
• United States
10 May 16
@akalinus That's pretty good that you were able to actually type all that and send it off ! I thought she would at least reply to make sure you were ok from the plane crash!
1 person likes this
@akalinus (14612)
• United States
10 May 16
@much2say You are just too funny.
2 people like this
@DianneN (74480)
• United States
9 May 16
Did you send a voice text or was that for real??? Omg and lol! That is an awfully high fever. Hope you get well soon.
1 person likes this
@akalinus (14612)
• United States
9 May 16
It was a PM on Facebook. Thanks for the good wishes.
2 people like this
@DianneN (74480)
• United States
10 May 16
@akalinus Lol! Just as bad. Hope you are feeling better today, Jo Ann.
2 people like this
@akalinus (14612)
• United States
10 May 16
@DianneN Much better today. We went shopping this morning and I could actually walk without falling.
2 people like this
@peavey (16333)
• United States
11 May 16
Maybe not that crazy, but I once told my boss that I had to swim a river, climb a sand dune and jump a burning building, but I got him the files he wanted! He did manage to say "thank you."
1 person likes this
@akalinus (14612)
• United States
11 May 16
Maybe he thought you were exaggerating!
1 person likes this
@peavey (16333)
• United States
12 May 16
@akalinus Nah... I never exaggerate and he knows it.
@akalinus (14612)
• United States
12 May 16
@peavey Of course, you don't.
1 person likes this
@scheng1 (24811)
• Singapore
10 May 16
I think the high fever has not really got to you. If you have a very high fever, you may not even have the strength to use computer or phone, much less to think of a story and type it out.
1 person likes this
@akalinus (14612)
• United States
10 May 16
It is the truth. I wish I never did that, but I did.
2 people like this
• Jacksonville, Florida
9 May 16
Oh my gosh, I hope you are feeling better now! That fever must have been high to leave a message like that. LOL
1 person likes this
@akalinus (14612)
• United States
9 May 16
At the time, I thought it was really important for her to know this. Go figure!
1 person likes this
• United States
9 May 16
I would minus the whole camel, dessert stuff I hope you feel better!!
1 person likes this
@akalinus (14612)
• United States
9 May 16
I must have been delirious. This dream state went on and on. Glad I quit after that convoluted message I left her.
@Shiva49 (12091)
• Singapore
11 May 16
I had 105 degrees only once when I had typhoid and I was delirious. I could not even sit up. You did better than me! siva
1 person likes this
@jstory07 (65395)
• Roseburg, Oregon
10 May 16
Lots of times and that is fun.
1 person likes this
• Preston, England
10 May 16
not written anything that wild - hope you wrote back explaining the first message - also that your temperature is come down again now
1 person likes this
@miniam (9244)
• Bern, Switzerland
9 May 16
Lol i could not have the cheekiness to write that.Or was it the fever talking?
@akalinus (14612)
• United States
9 May 16
It was the fever talking, for sure. I am not in the habit of leaving weird messages on FB, especially to her.
@miniam (9244)
• Bern, Switzerland
9 May 16
@akalinus Are you better today? because that sounds serious
@akalinus (14612)
• United States
9 May 16
@miniam Thanks for asking. Still hot and shaky but am feeling better. Took a pain pill for my gigantic headache and maybe will get something to eat later.
@jaboUK (53403)
• United Kingdom
11 May 16
That fever really got you didn't it? Has she replied? I hope you are feeling better now.
@akalinus (14612)
• United States
11 May 16
She has not replied and I am back from the twilight zone.
1 person likes this
@jaboUK (53403)
• United Kingdom
11 May 16
@akalinus You made me laugh with that. I'm glad that you are better.
1 person likes this
@akalinus (14612)
• United States
11 May 16
@jaboUK Always glad to make someone laugh.
1 person likes this
@puddleglum (1418)
• United States
9 May 16
I hope you recover from this, it sounds pretty severe to cause that reaction. I'm sure the pastor's wife will understand, once she knows you were unwell. Or she'll send a search party to the desert to look for you and the lame camel.
@akalinus (14612)
• United States
9 May 16
You made me laugh. Thanks for that. I don't know what desert we crashed in but it must have been in Africa because there were camels.
1 person likes this
• United States
9 May 16
@akalinus Yes. It's all starting to come together now.
1 person likes this
@akalinus (14612)
• United States
9 May 16
@puddleglum I think I was coming apart. Remind me to stay off of FB when I have a high fever!
1 person likes this
@DaddyEvil (23552)
• Aurora, Missouri
12 May 16
First, I have to commend you for thinking of your fellow survivors of the plane crash! Then I want to commend you on the excellent way you covered your absence from church on Mother's Day! (I mean, after all, who will complain about the lady who kept all the other plane crash survivors alive in that kind of situation by sacrificing yourself for people you didn't even know!) That took incredible intestinal fortitude, Jo Ann! Next, I am sure your pastor's wife is thinking, like I am, why didn't Jo Ann invite me, too? What am I, chopped liver? You can quit worrying now! I called your pastor's wife and told her you were bringing her a half dozen bottles that can hold a whole human being! I hope you have that many left! OH! She ask about sealable lids... I told her no problem! (RG!) Me? Something silly/crazy? No, not that I can think of offhand!
@akalinus (14612)
• United States
12 May 16
Thanks, you are funny and entertaining. I love it.
1 person likes this
@DaddyEvil (23552)
• Aurora, Missouri
14 May 16
@akalinus You're welcome? Funny and entertaining?Are you peeping in my window? You ARE, aren't you?! Well you can just stop looking now! I flat refuse to do the Hopak anymore, unless all the blackout curtains in my house are tightly drawn! Uhm.... Well, unless you plan on clapping and keep time for me.... When I cross my arms, squat down and kick both legs out in front of myself, I can lose the beat, so I could use a little help. I'll agree to entertain you some more if you promise to help me with the Hopak. Deal?
@Corbin5 (100138)
• United States
9 May 16
Sounds like you were delirious from fever! I am sure the pastor's wife was shocked by your words. Hopefully, she knows you were not well at all!
@akalinus (14612)
• United States
9 May 16
She probably already thinks I'm crazy. This will only prove it.
1 person likes this