My Ex-Husbands Tail

@Bytemi (1553)
United States
February 7, 2007 10:12am CST
My daughter apparently walked in on her father when he was taking a shower and saw that he has a "tail" and now she wants one too and she wants to see mommys. She is only three and I think that might be a little young to try and explain the differences between a man and a woman, how do I handle this. She went on a long story the other day with a friend of mine, telling him how Daddy's has a tail and he thinks it is too small and wants a bigger one like the dog. I thought it was funny, but on the same note she doesn't realize what she is saying and I could understand where my ex would not want this broadcast. Any suggestions would be helpful.
1 person likes this
5 responses
@astromama (1226)
• United States
7 Feb 07
You know, I read somewhere that around the age of three is when boys begin realizing they are boys and girls realize they're girls... I don't think she's too young to explain the difference... I think it's an important step in learning about who she is. I'm about to have a son and it amazes me to think that although I'll be dressing him in green and blue, he will have no idea that he even has a 'gender' for years... Funny story, though! She sounds adorable!
2 people like this
@Bytemi (1553)
• United States
8 Feb 07
I think she is adorable but I am bias and I know that. :D I guess it is time to have a talk with her, I just didn't expect it this early, I am not mental prepared for this.
1 person likes this
• United States
7 Feb 07
LOL on the tail... that is too cute! This might be a good chance to explain private areas. My friend just uses the generic word "privates" to describe the whole area including butts and boobs. for both men and women. I think it would also be ok to tell her that only boys have a "tail". I have also heard to tell them that any place that is covered by your bathing suit is a private area. I like that too. Its a really hard concept for kids.. that some things are private. My 5 year old has issues with this. Ashley
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@Bytemi (1553)
• United States
7 Feb 07
Thank you those are some good thoughts, so you don't think that I would confuse her even further by trying to explain the differences between a man and a woman.
1 person likes this
@bethack52 (407)
• United States
7 Feb 07
thats so cute, maybe let her think for a while its a tail, but tell her there is nothing wrong with daddy tail and its a private tail so dont tell everyone and if she has questions to ask you or her daddy and address them as she asks them
2 people like this
@Bytemi (1553)
• United States
7 Feb 07
That is a good idea thank you, I am just wondering if she will understand. She tries so hard to act like she understands everything that we say but most of time, it is lost on her. Not that I don't love her or that I am putting her down, she is the most special little girl in the world to me.
1 person likes this
@mrsturner (519)
• Canada
7 Feb 07
Little children are smart and tend to associate what they see with what they already know. ie a dog's tail and male genitals. I think that children should be told the truth in a very clinical way. Daddy having a tail is a funny story to tell people. Daddy being like every other man on the planet is not so interesting and she'll probably forget all about it.
2 people like this
• United States
9 Mar 07
you might want to visit a library and obtain an age appropriate book that you can read to her explaining the differences between boys and girls. just an idea. it also may help you with how to discuss this in a way she understands. by the way, observant little one you got there.