How do you deal with a hypochondriac?

I am in the same boat as you. I also have a sister who is a hypochondriac. Whatever anybody else has she has the same but much worse. If she has a headache it's a migraine. If she cuts her ginger, it's severed and if she sneezes, she has influenza. I have given up on her. I visit her and I listen to her, but I don't indulge in her petty complaints. If I told her that she was a hypochondriac, I am sure she would never talk to me again, and then she would have something else to moan about.

Wow, it sounds like she is screaming for attention. I know that it is tough to deal with, but she probably does really feel pain, it is becaused by her brain, but to her that pain is very real. You are right, she does need psychiatric help, and until she accepts it, there is nothing that will work. You have to figure that in a way, she is much worse off then you are, your illnesses and pain can be treated, hers really can't. I know that this does not help you deal with her, or give you more patience and unfortunately there is not much that you can do. But at least you are mentally healthy! one day, she will have a real problem (it happens to the best of us) and no one will listen, she has already had so many tests, nothing was found and the doctors will blow her off. Then she will be in real trouble.

My mother is a hypochondriac. Over the years I have just had to ignore her. She has claimed to have everything from West Nile Virus to the Bird Flu! Recently her doctor told her that she has Fibromyalgia. That was the worst thing he could have done because she now uses it as an excuse for everything. I personally think there is nothing wrong with her other than severe depression and social anxiety...but i am no doctor. Most likely you are never going to change your sister's behavior. That is who she will always be. You have to find a way to ignore it. If you can...try to talk to her about it. Unfortunately I have blown up at my mom about her problem...no, it didnt solve anything because she still does it. So now when she starts to get Malaria, i get a little sarcastic with her and then try to ignore it.

This is a really tough situation for you to be in. You mentioned that you had cancer in the past. Hypochondriacs often somatisize and experience physical symptoms that are not explained by any physiologic disorder when they have a close family member who has suffered a serious illness. This is their way of dealing with the fear of getting sick themselves. As you know, they are not "faking it", as they truly do perceive physical symptoms. You also mentioned that many doctors have reassured her that she has no physical problems and that psychiatrists did not help. You're right that psychiatric treatment will never help unless she admits to even the possibility of a mental cause. Have YOU ever approached her about this? It might be worth a try to sit down and have a calm, mature, rational conversation with her about your concerns for her. Don't attack her or make her feel in any way that she is "faking", and don't let her realize how irritated you get at her (as you said, this will only alienate her). Approach it as if it's all about her. Reinforce that there is nothing identifiable wrong with her physically and suggest that perhaps another psychiatric opinion would help. Maybe she would respond better if you went with her. Tell her that you will do whatever it takes to help her; be honest with her about what you think is going on, but do it in a non-judgemental way. If she gets defensive and angry, don't feed into it. She will hopefully soon realize that you are trying to help her and to maintain your love and closeness. The last thing that you need is the stress and emotional turmoil that this is obviously causing you. Hopefully you will be able to resolve this and preserve your relationship.

Hi, Catherine here. I hope what I think/say helps you... if she starts to go on about her "medical problem(s)" as she does, maybe you could try to not focus on what she is saying about it, instead gently turn her subject/mind to a happier subject. Hugs and cuddles help alot to ease into a different topic. My family has a friend who is the same like your sister, but to top it off, she has Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. That is how we deal with the problem when it comes up.

Then you must tell her how her pretend illnes makes you feel. it is not going to change any thing untill she really does get some thing seriously wrong with her then of course no one will believe her then as well. so do not discuss illneses with her and if she brings up the subject tell her you are not informed enought to discuss this , she may give up and talk about other good stuff, but one of the things a hypochondriac is famous for is discussing their illnesses real or imaginary.

Hi! One of my grandmothers was like this. If someone was discussing a problem, hers was always worse, more painful, whatever. We got really frustrated with her and did a lot of venting behind her back LOL but we would just say, "Yes," or "I'm sorry to hear that," and go on with our conversation. I don't know if she ever got the hint, but we would just politely acknowlege her and move on. Hope that helps! :-)

I have a friend that is the same. Being blunt with the person usually helps. She was complaining about having chest pain and talked of having symptoms of a heart attack. I told her that if she felt she had a problem to talk to a doctor because I was not one. She did and of course the doctor ordered tests. The tests showed she did not have a problem. Of course they had to have overlooked something. I blew up over that one. She still is worse off than anyone and has had every illness. I just tell her to go see a doctor and walk away.

just tell her the day will come when she really is ill and in need of medical help and no one will believe her, some people just thrive on the attention they get good luck

being a psychiatrist i will tell u the actual treatment of hypochondriasis. i am form india. do not say to the patient that he/she is not having illness. just reassure them that u'll become alright. tell them to engage themselves in relaxation exercise. a good psychiatrist should tell her the mind and body relationship( if u want to know i can tell u). keep her as least as on medications.

I am sort of a hypochondriac. The problem most hypochondriac's face is that no one believes them. With me I am just so paranoid that something is going to happen to me that if I have a headache I am thinking, omg! What if I have a brain tumor. I like to be listened to, and told everything will be ok, and not brushed off like oh, its just another paranoid thought. I know it sucks, cuz I know how people usually react to it..I would just say, to think your thoughts but try to be supportive. I know when you have your own "real" problems that it is harder to deal with than ones people think they might have. But seeing someone so close to you go through things can make you feel paranoid about yourself. So, take it as a compliment that she loves you so much!

My mother and her daughter are exactly like this. They're family, but at the same time, I have lost patience with them on more than one occasion. The most effective method I have found for dealing with their habit is not acknowledging it. I simply say 'I'm sorry' and then continue with the conversation as if nothing was ever said. Sometimes, this does not work. I have found that by acknowledging it and then asking them what they are going to do about it forces them to stop bumping their gums and think. If they tell me that they don't know- I tell them to go do research or consult a doctor, but since I cannot help, let us move onto a different topic. Unfortunately, this is simply something that can't be fixed in an instant unless the other person wants to do something about it.

I my self have turned into a hypochondriac after my recent anxiety attack. And the one thing im going to say is it's because you feel so alone with your problems. Hell I started to GIVE my self symptoms if i started to read them off of webmd or any medical web site. The best thing is to just shrug it off as a medical behavior. Let her feel adequate when she starts complaining about her symptoms or what not. Just remember its a sickness.

I've had my fair share of them, basically it's a type of attention seeking. I just found to ignore them or just agree with them, if you let it get on your hump you will explode. You'd probably find that she will argue to that her back pain is worse or that she has it worse, I found through dealing with them is to agree with them and discuss your pain with another sybling or friend. She obviously can't help it.

I wish I did not how to deal with it, my sister is always thinking there is something wrong with her althou she is getting better, hopefully it's just a phase and it will pass, or maybe it's a way to get attention

Hypochondria is a real disorder. It can stem from a person's need for attention, to a real fear of having ailments even if they manifest them. Here's some medical information on hypochondria, which may help you better relate, understand, and deal with this family member, despite her being annoying. http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/article/001236.htm http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/hypochondria/DS00841 Hope this helps you to gain control of your patience level with her. As annoying as she may be, it is a real disorder and it is hard to make the person that has it, believe they have it because they manifest conditions that really and truly become true in their minds.

Ya it seems worse and not fair on god i think i dont know why such diseases come to persons who are very dearly to us and to whom we love and recently i lost my lovingly brother in law who was one of the closest and dearest freind of mine and i am now alone without him and when ever i think of that i cant tolerate and i curse the god at that time i know no body is permanent in this world but he was still young and energetic and it is really bad if that kind of thing happens.

I realize that people like that can be soo annoying! I have a younger sister that I always thought was a "cry baby" because she has less than zero tolerance for pain. Although she is a bit tougher now than what she was as a younger child. But she really has no pain tolerance at all. I just had to learn to accept that about her. My best friend is one of those that always assumes the worst. She wants everyone to wait on her hand and foot if she is sick or has to have surgery. This same woman also thinks she's supermom. she gets too much on her plate then expects everyone else to help her cover herself where she is spread too thin. She recently had to have surgery on her knee and wanted me to travel 800 miles to help take care of her when she went home from the hospital.. she has two older kids (teen and young adult) and a boyfriend that lives with her and she could not understand why I felt that she did not need me. She also has the been there done that attitude, where no matter what you have done or been through she has too.. and hers is always worse, etc... She is a little bit dramatic and will get on your nerves. She got her feelings hurt when I told her that, but we are still friends. I think you should tell your sister the truth. That she is over doing it on the pain issues and that you get tired of hearing about it. but also remember that she may not have a very high pain tolerance too.. And maybe things affect her more severely than you. She is family,so just tell her that you love her, but you get tired of hearing about all her aches and pains all the time. Let her know how it makes you feel when she does the things she does. I doubt it would make ya'll further apart. But it might make her mad, but she will get over that. Especially if you tell her that you love her and love being around her but just can't take some of the things she does

I agree with the other people's comments. Instead of shrugging her issues off, it's better to treat her with attention and love. That's probably what she's looking for and if you try reversing your reactions, she'll probably realize that there's no point in doing them. I wish you luck in dealing with your sister and I hope things will get better soon!

I was thinking of a story I heard about. Your family member's symptoms don't sound quite like hypochondria. They sound a bit more like Munchausen's Syndrome. This is more of a disease where people feel they need to be ill to get attention. They will even have unnecessary medical tests and surgeries in extreme cases. Hypochondriacs genuinely believe that they are sick. Your relative sounds like she's "faking" to get attention. Also I read of something scary while reading about Munchausen's. It's called Munchausen Syndrome by Proxy. This is where a carer/parent of a child, especially the mother makes their child sick and or puts them through the odd medical tests to get attention. I know this doesn't directly concern your relative, but was an interesting read. Also, you might want to look into Conversion Disorder and see if there are any signs of that in your relative. They sound a bit similar to me, but you can see if anything in articles about them really sticks out.