For those who do not live in your country of origin

@Eiloin (327)
March 24, 2007 5:00pm CST
Was it easy for you to integrate in the new place? How long did it take you to adapt? Did you find it easy to interact with people there? Do you miss your home country, or you consider your new country as your home now? For me, when I first left my country, it was awfully difficult for me to adapt in the new country. For one, I didn't know the language, for another, everything but everything seemed so different to me. Now I am very well adapted here, though I still feel like a stranger many times and I still find hard to understand how do people think. As for my home country, I do not exactly miss it, but I miss my family and friends, as well as the ability to talk to my own language -the only one I can use to express exactly what I mean, with no margins of misundersandings
4 people like this
16 responses
@GuateMom (1411)
• Canada
25 Mar 07
I live in a country very different from my home country. I am originally from Canada and I moved to Guatemala 5 years ago. I suffered many of the same shocks as you in that I spoke only English and learning Spanish was a long hard journey for me. Although I am now fluent, there are still times when I find it hard to express myself correctly, especially since there are fewer words in Spanish! That is probably the most difficult part for me. The other thing that is very difficult is the racism. As a white person, I was not accustomed to being the minority in my own country, but here I have had people spit on me because they think I am American. That was the worst thing anyone ever did apart from some young men throwing rocks at me in the market. However, I suffer from racism now every day, in the form of store clerks attending everyone else before me, even if I arrived first, and people assuming that I know nothing about raising children because I am from another country (where we supposedly donĀ“t have kids!). I do consider Guatemala my home because I was never happy in Canada and I am here. Although sometimes I just think it would be easier to go back to where I know how things work and where I can just do stuff myself without relying so heavily on my husband!
2 people like this
@Eiloin (327)
25 Mar 07
Oh, the racism is really a big problem, me too I cope with it everyday. Not that people understand immediately that I am foreigner, but once I spell two words, they understand from the pronunciation that I am foreigner and then the various reactions start. Still it's nice to hear that you consider it your home now, I really wish I can say the same thing soon
@sarahdell (130)
• United States
25 Mar 07
i am not living in my country of origin as of the moment.. well, for me, it was a bit easy.. actually, i am really used to moving from place to place.. i was born in the Philippines and i grew up in Saudi Arabia.. living in a foreign country, i have lived with and known the culture of many races.. basically, i know some of their traditions coz me and my foreign friends tend to discuss some of the cultures of our respective origins.. i went back to my home country when i was 16 and stayed there till i was 21.. now, i'm here in the US.. continuing my studies.. culture wise, i didn't find it hard to cope with the American culture coz i was in and out of this country since i was 5.. language wise, since i grew up in Saudi Arabia with other different races and english as a primary language, it wasn't hard for me to cope in that area.. the thing that i had the hard time of coping is the emotional ties between me and my friends from the Philippines.. i just love Filipino's ways of keeping and cherishing friends.. that is what i miss most.. well, i know that if ever i will be given a chance to choose where to settle down, i would still say the Philippines.. for me, there is still no place like home..
@Eiloin (327)
25 Mar 07
Well said, there is no place like home. Thanks for answering me
@kamran12 (5555)
• Pakistan
25 Mar 07
when i came to study in a foreign country, it was totally a diferent ball game for me. the cultural shock was the bggest problem, then there is language problem. i shear your problem of not being able to express myself as i wanted. though people are really nice here but still they can never be like your family and friends. cultural difference made it much difficult for me to feel like home and i still can't and waiting for my studies to end so that i could go back home. because of different historical, cultural and regional backgrounds you can never integrate fully in a diferent society and culture even if you live 10 years with them.
2 people like this
@Eiloin (327)
25 Mar 07
It's just like if I was hearing myself now!! Exactly the same thing for me!!! Anyway, we should consider ourselves lucky, as we still have our families and friends back in our countries, and there is always a home there to go back
• United States
25 Mar 07
It was quite easy for me to adjust here in the U.S. I guess the weather was the most difficult adjustment because in my country of origin, there are only two seasons and it's a tropical country. I came here to the U.S. at wintertime. I never had difficulty with the language (because English is the second language in my country) and the people (the Philadephians are very accommodating). I took me only three months to adjust to everything. I do miss my country, and during the summer break from work (I'm a teacher here in the U.S.), I would be vacationing in my country (the Philippines). I still have my family and friends back there, and I miss the hang-out places I would frequent when I was there.
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@Eiloin (327)
25 Mar 07
Actually the language is a big issue, if you already speak the language of the place then I guess it's much more easy to adjust. Well, the summer is approaching, so you 'll soon enjoy your vacation with your family and friends :):)
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
25 Mar 07
I was only about four when I came over to Canada therefore I was not a stranger to the language. However when I got older, I found that certain things back in England had different words in Canada. My mother was English, and I kept my accent, but found once I moved farther East, the accents in the Prairies were strange to me. I would hate to know what would happen if I did not speak the language when I came over as many of my friends did who came from the Netherlands. Now that my husband's nearing retirement, he's been looking at travel brochures of Great Britain and Europe and now I wonder whether it will be like it was painted by my mother and grandmother and what I saw on the late night movies or whether it is different.
@Eiloin (327)
25 Mar 07
I really hope you find everything as you kept it in your memories :) Good luck
@LittleMel (14055)
• Canada
24 Mar 07
I do have a relative living in the US, but over here I only have my husband as family. It's really hard but I soon adapted since I communicate with them all the time. I ahte the weather boy I just can't describe it to you, especially when people said they went for holiday to some tropical countries - I was like "that's where I came from!" I learned English when I was young, thinking it would help me get a job. It helped in first communication with my husband and then I learned new phrases from him too. But the culture difference is like two sides of the coin, the good thing is my husband is open to learn foreign culture and so I feel it's only fair if I learn his.
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@Eiloin (327)
24 Mar 07
I always wondered about marriages of people of different cultures and background, how can they work. You are so lucky because it seems you have a good communication with your husband and are both open-minded, so you can combine your different backgrounds. As about the weather, I checked your profile and saw you live in Canada, and I though, OMG, I shouldn't complain about the weather anymore. I think I could never take such cold :):)
1 person likes this
@Sicantik (706)
24 Mar 07
I left my country Indonesia when I was 18 to stay and study in London,UK. It was very hard in the begining because Not only I have to adapt to the cold weather I also have to adapt to intirely different culture. However I managed to get used to the country by concentrating on my study, making a lot of friend, I even managed to find myself a nice boyfriend who is now my husband. Now almost 12 years later I still live in the UK only different town. And am now married with one son. The reason I can stay as long as I stay is because I try to keep contact with Indonesian so I can keep my tradition a life and feel like at home all the time. And I always try to keep in touch with my family with phone calls, emails, messangers and try to visit once a year...
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@Eiloin (327)
24 Mar 07
I try too to keep as much frequent contact as possible with my family. Its wonderful you adapted so well in the UK and made your own family there. I wish I could make my own family too, but it seems so difficult for the moment. Thanks for your answer
• Canada
25 Mar 07
I moved from the UK to Canada almost three years ago. The language is the same so I didn't have that barrier, but their way of life is completely different. When my partner first drove me in the car from the airport to his parents house, I sat in the passenger seat, fingernails digging into the sides of the seat with my eyes squeezed shut with fear LOL. Sitting on the opposite side of the car was a nightmare for me at first, but gradually I got used to it. I also learned that their pronunciation of certain words was much different, and not only that, some of the words they use are way different to what I was used to as well, so it did make things a little confusing at times. I also learned firsthand that the weather is drastically different. On my first full day I got so badly sunburned that I needed help in the shower to wash my hair and my upper body. A week later, my face started to peel and I looked like something out of Frankensteins bride LOL. Almost 3 years later, I wouldn't change a single thing. Canada is everything I dreamed it would be, and more.
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@Eiloin (327)
25 Mar 07
Oh, yes, it's true, in UK u use to drive in the "wrong" side of the road, lolll So you got sunburned in Canada???? a country which is always covered by snow??? :):):) (or at least that's what I have heard about)
@scrawl (374)
• India
25 Mar 07
Yes.. language is the most important, next the facilities, then food, if your kind of food is not available... then culture and then ofcourse the people... Basically it's fun..try and enjoy yourself and then most of these things won't arise...
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@Eiloin (327)
25 Mar 07
Yeah, you 're right, it is kind of fun, actually. And many times it can lead to really funny situations
• Philippines
25 Mar 07
yah... its really hard to adopt to a new place, especially when you dont have an idea of their culture and everything... its really difficult.. because everything is new... like the language, the foods, the culture, tradition, the beliefs.. and everything... even in our own country.. sometimes its hard to adapt coz some places have different dialects thats spoken, different traditions that they follow, its really hard especially when your not used to it... but i know that we can learn to adopt to the new environment that we are on in just a matter of time...
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@Eiloin (327)
25 Mar 07
It's funny you mentioned it, because actually I have lived in a city in my own country where the people's pronunciation sometimes was giving me a hard time :):) You are also the first one here to mention the food: Actually the food was one of the greatest changes here. Especially the first time, that I didn't understand the language, I was looking like an idiot in the super-market, trying to read the ingredients of its product so to figure out what on earth is it :):) And still, sometimes in the restaurant or in my work's bar, I have to ask about the plates because there are times I cannot understand even if there is meat or fish in the plate :)
@charms88 (7541)
• Philippines
25 Mar 07
I know what you mean, eiloin. After I graduated, I went to live in another country. It was a very difficult adjustment for me too. The feeling of nostlagia is hard to resist. I toughen up myself and try to look on the brighter side. Nothing will happened to me if I continue sulking in the corner thinking of home. I slowly found my new life and eventually gained few friends. The best thing that happened to me though is to realize my capacity to live indepentdently. :)
@Eiloin (327)
25 Mar 07
:):) Yes, this is a great thing, to learn to live by yourself. I would also like to add that such experiences are really life-lessons. You discover things about the world and even about yourself you never had imagine before :) Thanks for your nice answer
@LiminaL (164)
• Italy
25 Mar 07
I've often moved from one country to the other, and always received a lot of simulas out of these expriences. First of all, and obviously, to know or not to know the local language makes a huge difference. second: the kind of activities you're up to in the place play an important role. For example, if you are studying in the new Contry, this will make it much much easier to find your place in it. The same, if you are involved into some work activity which involves interaction with the new world you find yourself in. There have to be reasons and occasions of exchange with people and environments around. I also miss what is not here, but I always find myself to choose this way instead of going back to my original place for the rest of my life.
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@Eiloin (327)
25 Mar 07
Yeah, its true, if you are studying you go to the new place and find immediately a new circle of people in your age, with similar mentality, etc. If you are working, things might be a little bit harder. Thanks for answering me
@vanities (11387)
• Davao, Philippines
25 Mar 07
i havent experience though but i thnk i can integrate or be able to adjust immediately coz when i already experiencing the moving out always i mean residence coz my husband were always transfered from another places and he would take us with him always...
@Eiloin (327)
25 Mar 07
I guess problems you encounter when moving in a foreigner country are more complicated than moving places in your own. The language, for one thing, and sometimes more factors like culture, costumes, food, religion, etc.
• Philippines
25 Mar 07
I am currently working abroad. I miss my country than staying here. KSA has many prohibitions, fully restricted country. Philippines is an open country that enjoy full freedom. Homesick is a fact to every foreigners... especially living alone. I will always miss my family, friends & gimicks.
@Eiloin (327)
25 Mar 07
I dont know a lot about KSA restriction's, but I agree you always feel more free in your own country. So many things that are natural for me seem strange here and so many things people here do everyday make me feel awkward and uncomfortable. And off course the homesick... I really feel just as you
25 Mar 07
i am from india....migrated to uk...some 2-3 years ago...!! n frankly it dont take me long to adjust!!! its more fun here....n i do not feel bad about commin ova....!!im surely enjoying ma life..... oly i miss ma frnedz bak there....even though i hav made new frends...i want ma old one z bak!!! :( but apart from that everythigs gay lol
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@Eiloin (327)
25 Mar 07
lol, yeah, I ve heard that about UK. Well, as I see in your profile, u 're very very young, so its normal you adapted so easily. For me I was already 25 when I left my country and really took me long to adapt. Thanks for your answer and enjoy ur life :)
@abbey19 (3129)
• Gold Coast, Australia
24 Mar 07
It must be hard to fit into another country especially when you have to learn that language and not be able to communicate in your own language. I emigrated from the UK to Australia many years ago, so didn't have the problem with the language, but their way of life was so drastically different from what I was used to. However, I was young and soon adapted, and I consider this as my home. I do miss my mother and my siblings back in the UK, but would never contemplate going back there to live. Besides, my kids are all here but for one who lives in Florida, so this is home!
@Eiloin (327)
24 Mar 07
I agree, if you have your children there, then there is home for you. Thank you for answering