What would you do?

This may sound kind of dumb but I would pick up some articles or print some off of the internet about the currant laws of using carseat and I would put them in an envelope and mail them to her with no return address. Maybe seeing these will wake her up to the fact that someone is aware that she isn't doing what is good for the children. Just a suggestion. I don't really understand parents that don't put their children in carseats. I mean it is done for their own safety. I just don't get it.

Hi crazynurse, I would definately report her. Why? She is breaking the law, she is endangering her children. I have seen news reports of children going through windshields. Seatbealts save lives. Take care...

Oooh thats a hard one. I really don't know as people can be so aggressive nowadays if you mention anything that concerns their kids. However, you were friends with this person, so you could go the direct route of telling her that if she is found driving without her kids being safely strapped into the car she could be fined. I would make it look as if I was concerned for her benefit, even if it was for her kids. That way she will feel more appreciative that you are concerned for her benefit as well as her kids and maybe she will take more notice. Whats the word... reverse psychology.LOL

I think that I would have to say something to her about it. I do this with my neices and their children, if they get in their car and the children are not buckled in I just tell them that they can't leave my house unless everyone is in their car seat and buckled in. I get a lot of grumbling, but I explain to them that I love them, and I do not want to take the chance of losing one of them because they were not in their car seat and buckled in. You could also do it by mailing the info like other people have said in this forum. It is just one of those things that if you don't speak out, you would feel guilty if something happened. And then again, if you do speak out there is nothing saying that she would listen, but if she knows that people are noticing what she is doing she might just change her ways. I know that some of the hospitals in my area have car seat safety checks, maybe you could mail a flyer on that,too. Good luck in whatever you decide.

I don't like that. If it were me, I would call your local highway patrol or police department. What this family doesn't realize is that just a slight fender bender may kill the child held in the mother's arms. I know some one who got a ticket for a child not properly restraint in a car seat and they got a fine of like 300 to 500 dollars. That is nothing compared to having to bury your child due to irresponsibility. You say that they get government assistance, well call your local child and welfare office and explain the situation to them and that you are concerned. You can ask that your name be withheld and they can come out and do all the safety checks with the child safety seats. I live in California where it seems every year the age a weight goes up. I think it is six years and or sixty pounds. I have an eight year old who weighs around sixty pounds soaking wet, but she is also tall so she can go either way. I would not leave it be. How would you feel if something happened to those children and you knew that all it took was a phone call, you would have to live with that guilt for the rest of your life. Make that call before it is too late.

If I were you I would remind her as often as possible that she is breaking the law by not securing her children. Often, since the seats are mandatory, they can be obtained for free. If you call your local DMV you can ask if there is any resource for free car seats, and if so, pass it on. But she really should be securing her children, whether the seats are free or not. Remind her that her children could be injured really badly if she were to have an accident.

Wow! That would be a hard call to make. The one thing that has to be remembered though is that it IS child endangerment, and it IS breaking the law. It's kind of one of those 'danged if you do, danged if you don't' scenarios. If you turn your cheek to it, and the kids got hurt because they weren't properly restrained, you would feel horribly guilty for not informing the authorities. Then again if you ratted on them, you'd still feel guilty. Maybe you could talk to a police officer (if you know any personally) or give an anonymous call to the station in your town to voice your concerns. Even if you DON'T give your name, and say you're a concerned citizen, they would follow up on it and at least keep an eye out for her driving that way. Personally, I wouldn't say you were a concerned neighbor, because if they do check it out that would be all that they're allowed to say 'a concerned neighbor called in about this...' (And from there on out all neighbors are suspect to the family involved and would make relations even more strained than they already are.)Good luck whatever your decision!

Tough question. I think that they will get caught eventually for not using car seats. At least I hope they do before something happens. If you go talk to the couple, you are likely to get an earfull, even though you may be in the right. I don't think you will be able to change this couples habits. Something drastic will have to happen for that to happen. If they really were concerned, they would already be using car seats as required for their children. Like my daughter and her 4 year old...she is obsessed with using a car seat no matter what car she is in or who is driving. I can't blame her, for she is trying to protect my granddaughter. But some people don't look at things all that seriously until a major disaster strikes or they are forced to change. You could talk to the people, but I don't think it will make much difference and that is a shame. You have little power over their behaviors, and I can understand your concern about the safety of the kids. The only thing I think you might do is call the police and find out if there is something you or they can do.

I know to some people, my comment is going to sound like I am snooping into other people's business but in realiy I think of it as protecting the children when the parents wont. I have been at traffic lights before and saw toddlers climb in the back window or stick their head out the window. I get really upset. I had friend who lost her mother to a drunk driver. You must look out for these kids. You must call the authorites and give them the license plate number of the vehicle and tell them what direction the vehicle is going. The proper authorities must protect these young children. If they are receiving assistance, they can get out of paying a fine (unfortunately). But they will be told what they need to do to protect these young children. Yes, I have done this and It was not to be mean or out of spite. It was because I love children and it is a waste of life when children get killed in a wreck as a result of not being in proper restraint. You have me worked up now. LOL

well you can call the police but they will do nothing about it. they will say they will be they wont trust me. i have to many friends that are cops. the only things you can do is say somthing to them but yet you live next door and that could get ugly. you could call child protextive services but what if she lost her kids? how would you feel. is she that bad of a mom to have her kids taken? then you can stay out of it and if something happens to the kids due to it you can feel like crap more then likely. it is somthing that you have to decide only. i have a nieghbr that has an 8 month old and i have sen them put the baby in the seat but not buckle her. the seat they have is for a older kid. they have the right one but they consdier that to be a pain. well tehre mom is a good friend of mine. she is a truck driver so she is home about 1 time a week. i went to her and talked to her and jsut said hey she is a new mom and young and i am just worried and i know you are too. and she handled it from there.

I would definitely bring it to her attention somehow...even if you did what the other person said, mail articles to her annonymously. Think of it this way. IF something happened and those children, 1 or all of them, was killed or severely injured in a wreck, how would you feel, knowing you didn't speak up. If you do let her know, whichever way you would choose to do it, at least, if something happened, your conscience is clear that you did what you could, the rest was up to the mom. I would possibly even alert the Child Welfare services, since they live 'off the government' they might like to know this information. There's my 2 cents worth!

maybe you can remind your neighbor about that low ,be friendly and tell them is good for their children'growth.

I think the best is just to highlight it to them about the carseats.

I agree that you must do something, because how will you live with yourself if something were to happen? You would have to see the result of it next door to you every day, and tha would be a lot harder to face than a neighbour who you barely speak to anymore, anyway, who might be peeved at you. The anonymous leter might be a good way to start, and if nothing changes, an anonymous call to CPS. I doubt they would remove the kids on that basis, unless there are much bigger behind the scenes issues. I have 2 friends with four children, each, and yo would never in a million years catch either of the mothers or fathers in those couple endangering their children like that, so large numbers of children is no excuse.

You could try to talk to her and see what she says. I think it is really dangerous for those poor kids.

I like the idea of an anonymous note. Dear Maam, I have noticed you driving around the neighborhood with your kids in the car and unrestrained. Do you realize how unsafe that is? If you stop suddenly or Heaven forbid, get into an accident, your kids could be killed or hurt very badly. I understand children can be difficult, but you must be firm to protect their lives. Sincerely, A Concerned Neighbor

I like the idea of sending her information annonomously. That way you know you informed them and there won't be any hard feelings because she won't know it was you...lol I know a lot of people that think just because you are going somewhere close to home with no traffic you won't need a seat belt because as my mother used to say "you're only going down the street"...How dumb is that..and most accidents happen close to home..lol

I would suggest the same thing that tater said too. I really don't understand how parents can do this. All it will take is for them to have an accident and that could be the end for some of those kids. Its really sad.

I think use of car seats is mandatory in all states. But I would be trying to talk to them and explain how important it is for children to be in car seats and that they really need for the kids to be in one. If that didn't work I would make it known to the proper authorities only because this is for the safety of the child. For me that comes above anything else.

I would first try talking to her about the law and telling her she needs to put her chidren in them and put their safety first. If that didn't work I would have to get some kind of official involved because too many children die from not being in their carseats wen they should be.