Doubting your religion, god etc..how do you handle it?
By Ravenladyj
@Ravenladyj (22902)
United States
October 26, 2008 3:21am CST
so my bf is having an issue right now with his faith..He found God about 2 yrs ago and it was doing him wonders but lately he's been losing his faith...I have told him to talk to his Pastor about it but other than that i really dont knwo what to suggest..He reads his bible every day, prays daily, he goes to church every Sunday and so on but due to a few things that are goin on with him he's finding himself having a hard time hanging on to his faith in god etc....Being a NON-Christian myself I really dont knwo what other advise to give him..I could easily say just keep praying and reading blah blah blah but that seems like such shabby advice ya know..I mean he IS reading, praying etc but still he's having this struggle so to tell him to KEEP doing what hes doing seems stupid to me....
So my question is this...for those of you who've found yourself in this position in the past, what OTHER advice could I possibly pass on to him to help him out at this point in time?
thanks in advance 
1 person likes this
5 responses
@xParanoiax (6987)
• United States
31 Oct 08
Hmm. I'm not christian either, so I'm trying to figure out what sort of advice to give...um...
Well, same advice I'd give a pagan: take some time out for yourself to think and reflect on it all, to try to determine where your doubts are coming from, how you're feeling about it all, etc.
Otherwise, what really can you do?
And tell him it's normal to go through a doubting stage from time to time, it's no big deal in the scheme of things that he is going through this. He can take as much time as he needs.
1 person likes this
@Ravenladyj (22902)
• United States
1 Nov 08
Aw see now there should be either a "tie for best response" or second place choice LOL....excellent post Para..thanks
@xParanoiax (6987)
• United States
1 Nov 08
aww, thanks. I hope he gets through this without things getting too bumpy for him, since this stuff's often stressful for folks going through it.
@MsTickle (25180)
• Australia
29 Oct 08
Being in the same situation as your bf, I will be interested to read the answers you get. I'm told that God loves me but I don't feel his love, I pray and ask for help, wisdom, understanding, etc and I get no answer. I'm told he may not give me what I ask for , that he might help me a different way but how do I know?. I'm lost. and I don't know where to turn. I don't think I have faith, I can't see it or feel it, I have questions that there are no answers to.
It's making my life quite miserable.
It's making my life quite miserable.@Ravenladyj (22902)
• United States
1 Nov 08
Thats exactly how he's feeling MsT...hopefully some of the responses in this thread will help you out too...
all the best to you
@ronaldinu (12422)
• Malta
28 Oct 08
You have given hime the right advice. Just ask him to find a trusted pastor who can give him some answers to his doubts. Everybody pass through this stage and this is a sign of spiritual maturity. It means that he is no longer a baby spiritually that accepts everything that he is told. He is growing up but to do so he must analyze his beliefs. It is a normal part of growing up. © ronaldinu 2008
1 person likes this
@Pose123 (21635)
• Canada
26 Oct 08
Hi Ravenladyj, I don't think there is anything wrong with questioning our faith sometimes, if not we would be robots. Maybe your boyfriend has outgrown where he is right now and needs to move a step higher in consciousness. I believe that each of us are where we are supposed to be at the moment, but the time has to come when we move past it, it is impossible to stand still although many do for a long time. It is very difficult for some people to take that step, especially if they are constantly being told that there is no other way. Your boyfriend has to work this out for himself, he may decide to stay where he is now for a while but he does need to be comfortable with it. Being content with where we are at the moment is all that matters for anyone. Blessings.
1 person likes this
@Ghost_In_The_Machine (106)
• Australia
1 Nov 08
Tell him to explore other religions/belief systems.
Doubting your beliefs is a good thing in my opinion. It prevents you from getting stuck and it motivates you to learn more and keep an open mind.
The christian god is not the only version of god. Maybe it's just time for him to move on to something else. If it doesn't feel good, then it most likely isn't. Tell him to follow his heart.
@Ravenladyj (22902)
• United States
1 Nov 08
well he was very much a Native American Spiritualist a few yrs back which IMO fits him perfectly in all honesty and he does seem to still have interest in it...Oddly enough it fits his bloodline if that makes sense...His half sister whom is one of my dearest friends is Pagan and their ancestors were Romany..
I agree that doubting is a good thing...we constantly change on so many levels its not surprising that our beliefs get questioned by us and they should just like anything else in our lives...
its not that it doesnt necessarily feel good to him, i think whats happening is that he's trying to be TOO structured at this point in his life ya know...
