Ok, I need some clarification here from the Christian Community:  

I really don't think that it's the church that encourages the "decorations" at cemetarys, and I think it would be too much of a generalization to assume that anyone who leaves decorations at a gravesite is a Christian. I don't think it is very Christian to build altar-like memorials to our dead. That is not how they should be remembered, they should be remembered by their spirit and by the legacy and memories that they've left behind.

That being said, I don't quite understand the Christian concept of "where do we go when we die?" even though I'm a Christian! Some say Christians will go to heaven immediately when they die. Some say that they'll go to purgatory for a period of time before they go to heaven. Some say that no one will go to Heaven until the end of times, in which our bodies will be resurrected from the ground and we will be brought into heaven body and soul. I'm sure if I studied the Bible enough, I could come to my own conclusion, but frankly, I don't really care what happens to me when I die. Whatever happens it will be God's will.

Hi barehugs, Thanks for starting this discussion and you make a very good point. Although I visit the graves of my loved ones sometimes, I know that they are not there, that what we buried was the vessel that they once occupied but laid down when it was of no further use to them. They are now free from that broken body. Apparently many people associate their loved ones with the body they buried and feel that by adorning the site they are somehow honouring their memory.It may be that in the beginning it was those people who pressured the church to provide such places where monuments of all kinds could be placed and where loved ones could place flowers etc. Blessings.

I dont know a Christian Church who encourages this practice, maybe in your part of the world it happens.

But what I see and hear, is this is HOLY ground, and respect is needed always, Like we are are all taught that our body is like a TEMPLE, The HOLY of the HOLY.

And that we should treat it as such, Yes we understand in death the spirit body move on and what from the Earth we came and from the Earth we will return.

A Cemetery to me is a place we can reflect on a life who was once with us, and have respect for that being in its total.

I dont see the whole of life on Earth being in a grave I only see the earthly body there as the spirit has move to the next dimension, where that is Im not sure of, as the VALE has not be lifted from me at this time and I will only know this when GOD chooses to do so for me.

I have a loving GOD and I am not lost, he loves us all as he is GOD he is everything, He is the great all, Praise him in what ever name you have for him, as he has many names.

I am sure you are not lost(spirit) in the grave.

Being a grave is a holy place and it is like GOD is there, do we not bow to GOD, do we not praise GOD do we not keep GOD'S place CLEAN and HOLY.

HICCUP/

A cemetery or graveyard is for the bodies of the dead to be buried and not just anywhere. Their bones probably are left inside those tombs but not their flesh anymore because it was eaten by worms. The Church, the right church that preaches truth will never threaten anyone with hell. They are just preaching Jesus' message of salvation to those who trust in Him, and those who reject Him, hell will be their final destination. Seek the truth with a humble heart, and you shall find the truth, and the truth shall set you free!

i have friends and family that call me christian because most of what i believe is also believed by christians, but most of what i believe is also believed by many different religions. there are so many similarities between all the religions that its hard for me to even try to wonder what one i should belong to, i do not affiliate myself with any of them.

having said that

i cant really answer your question but i had to comment anyway. i too share your confusion. i seem to have a way different outlook on death than the people i have known. my christian family cried and cried when my grandfather passed. i have to admit that i too cried. but not for my grandfather who is now no longer suffering with the pain of a body that is eaten up with cancer. i cried for the family that is still her and couldnt just accept that grandpa is no longer in pain. the way LOTS of people look at death and how they deal with death puzzles me greatly, bringing it back to Christians....shouldnt they be happy that their family has went to the better place (if in fact that is where they went)? i do not visit a grave site, what is the point, even if there is no heaven or hell the person is still dead and they havent the first clue you are walking on them

im with you on this one i avoid christian cemetaries. I find them morbid and depressing places. All my ancesters are as you say stuck in the ground primerilly in one cemetery. However, as a pagan I have always found it deeply upsetting that these fields of the dead are kept, why not just remember?
blessed be