Wedding Blues? What would you do?  |
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 I was watching this series on TV about how you can make your dreams come true if you pursue them with determination.
In the series, one of the sub plots has this man who was about to marry his child hood love. During the days that led up to the wedding day, his fiancee did many things that made him wake up from his dream state.
She was possessive and full of opinions about what he should and should not do.
She even go to the extend of checking his emails and replying to them on his behalf.
And listen to his phone calls, read his messages and then reply to them as she deemed fit.
Replacing everything and anything in his home that identifies his presence into something she feels SHOULD be in a home.
He was troubled by her possessiveness. And as the days go by, he does not seem to have a say in anything with regards to the wedding or the home which he is suppose to share with his fiancee after the wedding.
Even the bed room where he sleeps as a bachelor was redesigned to include her presence in ever corner of the room.
Feeling overwhelmed, when asked by the pastor whether he as any doubts or forever to hold his peace, he broke that peace. And apologized to his fiancee and left her at the altar.
I know it is an embarrassing episode in the shoes of the bride.
Now, my question is this. Regardless of whether you are the man or the woman on the wedding day. If you are caught in a position like that man, where you suddenly see a different side to your future spouse, and you know that you cannot imagine living a life that is so restrictive, what would you do?
Would you back out of the wedding so that both of you can lead your own life without all the messy entanglements with the law with regards to divorce and other seperation red tape?
OR
Would you go ahead with the wedding, citing the wedding planning rush as an excuse for your significant other's eccentric behavior, and that everything would be better after the wedding?
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Wedding Blues |
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1.  katsalot1 (873) | 9 months ago |  I would definitely call the wedding off. If you realise that the person you are marrying is not the sort of person you could share your life with, then there is no point at all in marrying them. It might be embarrassing for the other person, but it would be wrong to go ahead with it. Marrying them would only be the start of a very unhappy life for both.
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| rmuxagirl (6593) | 9 months ago |  I would h ave to agree that I would call the wedding off. I couldn't imagine living my life with someone like that. It may be embarassing and hurtful, but it would be best in the end for both parties to end the relationship before it got worse and there was resentful feelings.
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| ahgong (3741) | 9 months ago | Yes... the question is, would you do it before the wedding day? As in call it off before the wedding day itself?
Or would you wait till the day you are about to exchange your vows? | |
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| ahgong (3741) | 9 months ago | Which is why he walked out of the wedding just after the pastor read the vows. And he renegated on his vows and walked out, leaving her at the altar.
And boy was she mad!
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| 3. kun2349 (7200) | 9 months ago |  I will not back out on the day itself, unless i'm really left with no choice.. Because it's gonna be so embarassing for just for me, but definitely for the bride.. If i'm not happy with certain things, and the way things are going, i will make sure i resolved them before the wedding.. I dun believe in things getting better after marriage, because if it does not work before marriage, how high is the possibility for things to work out after marriage??
To me, things will only get worst, and instead of dragging on the unhappiness, why not let it go before things turned ugly^_^
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| kun2349 (7200) | 9 months ago | Yeah^_^ Better to let it go when it's early and even though one dun care about our own pride, we have to think about the other party as well, as they are the ones we loved and thus we are standing there together, ready to take the oath..
THus, there's no reason to treat them that way by walking out of the wedding on the day itself.. And if we respect them, this kind of thing should not even cross our mind at all.. | |
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| ahgong (3741) | 9 months ago | There is a chinese saying "Xiang jian rong yi, xiang chu nan"... it is easy to be going out together. But when you stay under the same roof, it is a totlly different story.
And in the story, after the two of them came together under the same roof, then he realized how possessive she can be.
In such a situation, I am sure many people caught in the same plight will feel troubled as well. | |
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| kun2349 (7200) | 9 months ago | Yeah, that's why i will walk out and back out from the marriage before the ceremony takes placem rather than on the wedding day itself^_^ | |
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4.  eeyore39 (3181) | 9 months ago |  I do backing out is the way to go. If you can see that things will not be as you thought even before the marriage it will even get worse after so go on home. It may hurt someone temporarily but it will save them in the future.
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| ahgong (3741) | 9 months ago | Yeah, that seems to the correct way to deal with such a situation.
Problem is, you may see it as a quick way to and end. The other party may not and may even create problems for you after the whole episode is over.
The embarrassment, the shame, the humiliation of being left on the altar.
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| eeyore39 (3181) | 9 months ago | I guess those are things that should be weighed over in the decision making. | |
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