It's not nice to tell someone they're mad ....
By grandpa_lash
@grandpa_lash (5225)
Australia
September 30, 2009 6:18am CST
Or stupid. So, we Aussies tell them a they're a few sheep short of a top paddock, which covers both nicely. There are a few others I can recall that come from the oulde country, like "as thick as two short planks" or "not the sharpest tool in the toolshed".
So, tell me, what similar sayings do you have in your part of ther world/family/peer group? Perhaps we could compile a dictionary of tactful insults. Well, relatively tactful.
Lash
4 people like this
6 responses
@Wizzywig (7847)
•
30 Sep 09
Before we went decimal it was ten pence short of a shilling. There's also:- got a screw loose; at the bottom of the gene pool; nutty as a fruit cake; a sandwich short of a picnic; puddled; off your trolley; flying on empty......
I like "mad as a box of frogs" but that's not particularly subtle 
1 person likes this
@grandpa_lash (5225)
• Australia
1 Oct 09
We Aussies would say "Mad as a cut snake", "Silly as a two bob watch", and, of course, "If you gave him another brain it would be lonely".
On a different tangent, a miserly bugger "Wouldn't shout (a round of drinks) if a shark bit him".
Lash
1 person likes this
@Wizzywig (7847)
•
1 Oct 09
We have the phrase "tight as a ducks ar$e" for that! .. "doesn't want to let the moths out" (of his wallet)... "wouldn't give you the drips off his nose"
If there's someone you don't like, you "wouldn't pi$$ on him if he was on fire" or, one my dad used to say..."I hope his bo**ocks turn square and fester in the corners".... definitely out of the realms of subtlety there 
1 person likes this
@James72 (26790)
• Australia
1 Oct 09
"Tactful"? Sigh..... OK then, I'll try!
"A jockey shy of a Melbourne Cup winner"
"14 buns short of a bakers dozen"
"When he was born, they slapped his Mother"
"He left Australia to move to New Zealand and the average IQ in both countries increased because of it"
"A jockey shy of a Melbourne Cup winner"
"14 buns short of a bakers dozen"
"When he was born, they slapped his Mother"
"He left Australia to move to New Zealand and the average IQ in both countries increased because of it"
1 person likes this
@thebohemianheart (8827)
• United States
2 Oct 09
This one is not particularly subtle or tactful but, we used it a lot when I was in school.
He's/She's (not going to discriminate here*L*) eat plumb up with dumba$$.
He rides the short bus.
She's top contender for a job in the cuckoo clock.
One brick short a load.
Most of the ones I have always heard are just variations on the ones already posted.
@LadyMarissa (12148)
• United States
5 Oct 09
A few bricks shy of a load
His oars don't quite touch the water
A couple fries short of a Happy Meal
Dumb as dirt
I'm the only friend you've got & I don't like you
I'm sure there are more, but I can't think of all of them right now!!! Some were used by others above so I won't repeat any of them
@Sandra1952 (6047)
• Spain
2 Jan 10
Hello, Lash. One of my favourites is: 'All the chairs aren't under the table.' Another one I like: 'If he had another brain cell, they'd probably start a fight.' Then there's: 'He had a big helping of stupid for breakfast.' My absolute favourite is: 'He could't beat a one legged man in an a*se kicking contest.' I'm a bit late to this, but better late than never!
