Things you should not say to a stay at home mom
By shylade
@shylade (3132)
Philippines
April 16, 2012 8:29pm CST
well, i am a working mom but i so wanted to be a stay at home mom. I am into blogging and i have read a post of stay at home mom about the things you should not say to a stay at home mom.
The story goes this way. This stay at home mom went to a reunion with her friends and she waited for them for like 2 hours. Then she have learned that they don't have any reservation at the restaurant so they have to wait to be sitted. She asked her friend why they don't reserve yet and the friend replied, "i am busy, why don't you do it when you just stay at home." implying she's just at home doing nothing that hurts her feelings a lot.
i want to be a stay at home mom and sometimes i take a leave at work and take care of my son whenever his nanny is out for something important. i can attest to it that it is really tiring staying at home doing the chores, cooking and taking good care of my son with playing and teaching in between. so it is not right to tell that you are doing nothing at home, just watching tv, sleeping, eating and so on.
so if you happen to talk to a stay at home mom, here are the things you should not tell her:
1. When the kids are older, do you think you'll get a real job?
2. How June Cleaver of you!
3. Oh, so you don't work?
4. Since you have extra time on your hands, could you whip up a few dozen brownies for the bake sale tomorrow?
5. All day with your kids? I can't even imagine.
6. I'm jealous. I wish my husband were rich so I wouldn't have to work either.
7. What do you do all day, anyway?
8. I'm sure you're not the only one who's ever wasted money on a college degree.
9. That explains why your son is so clingy!
10. Weird. I assumed your house would be superclean.
-Candy Kirby of thelaughingstork.com, with help from her Twitter followers and friends
such a long post but i hope you take a time to read it. thanks and happy mylotting!
2 people like this
6 responses
@OpinionatedLady (5965)
• United States
17 Apr 12
Amen to that!
As a stay at home mother of four who also home schools the kids I hear a lot of things like this. My Sister in law likes to tell me "not everyone has the luxury of staying home with the kids" the irony of this is her husband makes three times what mine does and if she was willing to say go on only one vacation a year instead of one every three months, she could easily stay home with her brood!
Once my husband made comments like this. He was in between jobs (electrical he had a job set up but there was a two week break) so I said fine I want to take this coarse at the college I will go to school all day and you can be home with the kids all day. Second day in he called and asked me to come home. By the end of the week he was asking if he could have help for the following one. 
Never gave me a hard time again.
As a stay at home mother of four who also home schools the kids I hear a lot of things like this. My Sister in law likes to tell me "not everyone has the luxury of staying home with the kids" the irony of this is her husband makes three times what mine does and if she was willing to say go on only one vacation a year instead of one every three months, she could easily stay home with her brood! Once my husband made comments like this. He was in between jobs (electrical he had a job set up but there was a two week break) so I said fine I want to take this coarse at the college I will go to school all day and you can be home with the kids all day. Second day in he called and asked me to come home. By the end of the week he was asking if he could have help for the following one. Never gave me a hard time again.@OpinionatedLady (5965)
• United States
18 Apr 12
If you can figure out how to do it I would. That said remember you do what you need to do to survive and if that means not being home right now then it's ok. Do not let some of the Home stayers make you feel bad for not being a SAHM, I know some who are really rude about it (on both sides of that fence) but don't let them make you feel bad. We each have our own situations to deal with the best way we can.
@CRSunrise (2981)
• United States
27 Sep 12
I've never had anything like this said to me. While this has never been said to me, I imaging there are some people who do say this. If you don't have the right kind of relationship with the person, these comments can be hurtful.
I like being an at-home mom, but there are times when I wish I had a job to go to. Once in a while, I just want to get away from my kids. They drive me crazy at times. That's one thing I miss about not working, but I love spending time with my kids. Although, right now, I'm spending most of my days with my baby. My other two children are in school.
@shylade (3132)
• Philippines
27 Sep 12
I always admire stay at home moms. I am doing everything just to be with my son always. Time is running fast that I can't catch up with my son. I also try to spend quality time with him. I am just glad he loves to be with me and I can see he is always happy when I am around. Thank you for sharing.
@3SnuggleBunnies (16374)
• United States
22 May 12
I've rarely heard anything from anyone like this with the exception of my hubby. I've gotten the comment of me getting a better job so he can stay home and the house would be spotless. Funny though, with his job he's off 3-4 days a week and seeing him take the garbage to the curb is like a MIRACLE! So if he doesn't do much on his days off then... why would I even phantom he'd do anything if he was home full time?
@CRSunrise (2981)
• United States
27 Sep 12
I know what you mean. My husband is a truck driver, so he's not home a whole lot during the week. However, it'd be nice if he'd help out once in a while when he is home. I know, with some things, if I don't do them, they will not get done. I'm sure I'm not the only spouse who sings this song.
@ladym33 (10978)
• United States
20 Apr 12
I am a work at home mom and I have very little time to actually work on my business. When you work at home or you are a stay at home mom everyone assumes you have all this time and they take advantage of you. My own husband takes advantage of me. True he works hard at his job but every other task is thrown on to me. He works a lot of hours and always has so I practically raised our first two kids on my own. He has been here a little more for our youngest but he is starting to pile the hours on again. He complains about all the hours he works, but nobody seems to notice that I am still doing dishes at 8:00 at night. I dedicate one hour to my business every day to package up orders, if I have extra time then I add inventory and do other things that would increase sales, but from week to week I am lucky if I get 2 extra hours in to do those things. Somebody always needs something from me. I honestly don't know how I would do it if I worked out side the home.
@Archaiwy (599)
• China
17 Apr 12
In my opinion, not only does one not say some things to a stay-at-home mom,but he also can't say anything to any others, especially for those who are particular about anything. I meet with a person ,when i talk to him i must pay much attention,as if he feels it loud, he will turn a deaf ear.
@SissyRose (235)
• United States
17 Apr 12
I am a happy stay at home mom. And believe me it's not easy. Yes it is very full filling, and I did go to school but I don't think I wasted any of it because I can teach my children about it. Not only am I a stay at home mom but I am also known for being quite snappy when I feel like I am being downed by someone, and if someone ever said any of these things to me I would most like start fuming. I honestly think that if you can afford it anyone out there, then you should do it. I understand times are hard, but I have learned to scrimp and save and figure out a way to get by so that I can be at home with my children. My husband is no where near rich, but he works hard so that we can do this. I beleive it is crucial for mothers to be at home with thier children and to be honest if you dont have to work and you are just to live above your means then you are being selfish. Not you just people who would rather work than be with thier kids. they are blessings that God has graced us with so we need to care for that miracle like it's the last and only one we will ever have.
@shylade (3132)
• Philippines
18 Apr 12
nice one mommy. i get your point there. but at this moment we are paying a house and it will end after 6 years from now so it is really impossible unless the salary of my husband will be doubled (i am really praying for that), otherwise i need to work. but as you are saying, i am learning about other means to earn while at home. i know that God has a better plan for us so i just wait ofr the right time. i know staying at home is really hard and then people will just talk to you in that manner as if you are doing nothing. i like your response much and thanks for sharing that. you must be a new member so i welcome to mylot!
