proper phone manners

There should be proper etiquette observed be it on landlines or on cellphones, as long as it involves conversations with other people.

The Mistress of American Manners

The eight precepts of proper American etiquette and table manners.

do you know how to be a good friend??

Be real. Are you trying to be friends with someone to be accepted into a certain clique, or because you'd like to get to know someone else that he or she knows? That's not friendship, it's opportunism. Every new person you meet has the right to be accepted (or not) on his or her own merits, rather than being appraised and appropriated by some weird Professor Henry Higgins who thinks he can mold you or who wants you to change for his sake. Be honest. A dishonest person has no chance of having true friends. Keep your promises, do what you say you are going to do, and most importantly, don't lie! Lying leads to more lies, and people will eventually figure you out. If you found yourself lying about something, be honest - go up to them, tell them the truth and how you felt, as well as how you may think they would've felt (explain that you were second-guessing rather than trusting your friendship). Don't be a coward; if you know you were at fault for the whole dilemma, own up. Simply talk about it, hope your friend will forgive you. They'd most likely appreciate it in the future, to look back and say, 'wow!' I have/had an amazing friend by my side. Be loyal.To Your friends first! If your friend tells you something in confidence, don't blab about it to anyone else. Don't talk about your friend behind his/her back. Nobody likes a backstabber. Never say anything about your friend that you would not want to repeat face to face. Don't let others say bad things about your friend until you've had a chance to hear your friend's side of the story. If someone says something that shocks you and doesn't seem like a thing your friend would do or say, tell them, "I know him/her, and that just doesn't sound right. Let me talk to him/her, find out his/her perspective on this. If it turns out to be true, I'll let you know. Otherwise, I would appreciate it if you didn't spread that around, because it might not be." You can't play both sides of the fence. Evil is evil and keeping evil secrets can end a friendship. Be respectful. Know the boundaries. Things you and your friend discuss should be treated with care - your friend is not sharing this information with just anyone, and may not want to. She shared it with you - and only you, as far as you know. Example: If your friend doesn't want to name her crush, don't push her into it. If she has named her crush, don't tell anyone else. This is just common courtesy anyone and everyone deserves the expectation that you will keep confidences. Watch out for your friend. If you sense that s/he is getting drunk at a party, help him or her to get away from the alcohol. Don't allow your friend to drive drunk - take his or her keys and/or drive your friend home personally. If your friend begins talking about running away or committing suicide, tell someone about it. This rule overrides the "respect privacy" step, because even if your friend begs you not to tell anyone, you should do it anyway. Suggest a help line or professional to your friend. Talk to your and your friend's parents first, before involving anyone else. Exception to this rule: the parents are part of the problem (i.e., abusive, neglectful, alcoholic, drug abusers, etc.) - if this is the case, seek out a trusted teacher or counselor at school, or your parents. Pitch in for friends during times of crisis. If your friend has to go to the hospital, you could help pack his or her bags; if her/his dog runs away, help to find it, if he/she needs someone to pick him/her up, be there. Take notes for your friend in school and give them their homework assignments when they're absent and sick at home. Send cards and care packages. If there is a death in his/her family, you might want to attend the funeral or cook dinner for them. Care about your friend enough to help him or her open up and let tears roll. Give them a tissue and listen. You don't have to say anything, just be with them. If your friend is going through a crisis, don't tell them everything is going to be all right if it's not going to be. This goes right along with keeping it real. It's hard not to say this sometimes, but false reassurance can often be worse than none, and it may undermine your friend's ability to get through the crisis as well as they might. Instead, tell your friend that whatever they need, you are there for them. If they need to talk, talk; if they need to sit quietly, sit with them; if they need to get their mind off things, take them to a movie or concert. Give them a hug. You are friends, not strangers, after all. Just stay honest, but upbeat and positive. Even a stranger would most probably appreciate it. Give advice, add perspective. Don't judge your friend, but do advise to stay out of situations where they may harm themselves or others. Tell him/her how you perceive his/her situation, and what you might do in the same circumstances. Don't be offended if they listen to your advice and then decide to ignore it. Your friend must make his or her own decisions. Give your friend space. Understand if he/she wants to be alone or hang out with other people. Allow it to happen. There's no need to become clingy or needy. Allowing one another the time to hang with other friends gives you much-needed breathing room, and allows you to come together fresh and appreciating each other even more. Make sure your friend doesn't have to spend a birthday alone. You can hold a party for them (even a surprise party if you can keep a secret) or take them out to dinner and pay for their meal. Have fun. It's not all about bleeding hearts and advice to the lovelorn - or at least, it shouldn't be. Decorate your friend's locker on his or her birthday, have a spa party, host a sleepover, whatever. Join activities with them. There are many different activities in school systems today. Just find a common interest you and your friend share. Never make a promise you know you can't keep. Good friendship is based on trust - if you break a friend's trust, the friendship may be very hard to salvage. Of course, if you have made a promise and planned to keep it, but circumstances beyond your control conspire to prevent it, let your friend know as soon as you find out. Don't wait until 15 minutes after you were supposed to arrive to call and say, "gee, I'm sorry." Instead, a quick call to say, "Hey, I know I promised to help you with whatever it is, but my mom is telling me we are going to my aunt's for the weekend, and leaving tomorrow just after school - that means I won't be able to make it. I'm so sorry. Can we reschedule?" That's just honoring the fact that your friend is counting on you, and respecting the fact that, given a little notice, your friend might just be able to get someone else to help with whatever it was - or not, whatever. But at least you won't be hanging your friend out to twist in the wind. Listen to them; you don't have to agree with them - just listen to what they have to say. Make sure they are talking too and you are not just running your mouth. Some people don't really find it interesting listening to someone talk about their feelings 24/7. If you're monopolizing every conversation with your feelings, they aren't getting anything out of the friendship. Invite them to share their hearts with you as often as you share yours with them. Watch Their Feelings This is very important to abide by. If your friend has recently broken up or got a bad grade (anything that upsets them) remember to comfort them and help them get through. Also, don't let your friend push you around. If both of you like a certain boy, drop it. If one of you still likes him you should make sure that it is okay with your other friend too. Don't Abuse their generosity or "wear out your welcome" This is the most important of all of the rules.If your friend does something nice for you, then reciprocate. Money doesn't have to be an issue. Don't use your friends! Don't let them pay everytime you go out, even if they offer. Don't help yourself to things at their house without asking, unless you are willing and they do the same at your house. No one wants to be friends with a moocher or feel used.If you borrow something from a friend,take good care of it and then return it without being asked.Also if you end the friendship then you should return any gifts they bought for you. Especially if they gave you any gifts under false pretences. It's proper etiquette. Just like returning an engagment ring if you don't marry the person who gave it to you. Live by the golden rule.always treat a friend as you would want to be treated. If you don't there will be repercussions.Don't do or say anything to them that you wouldn't want done to you. Be there for them through thick and thin as long as they are a TRUE friend to you. Also learn to forgive. If there is an arguement. Truly access yourself and your behavior in the past.Sometimes you should be the one to apologize. Your previous actions could have led to the situation.

Tipping

The word originates from the 16th century verb tip, which meant "to give unexpectedly", and was derived from the German word tippen, meaning "to tap." The modern German version would instead be Trinkgeld, literally meaning "Drink Gold", or "Money to Drink" The notion of a stock tip is from the same slang, and the expression hot tip, as in a sure winner in a horse race, also comes from the act of tapping. In the old days, during card games, gamblers would have an accomplice in the room. This accomplice would signal the player regarding the contents of an opponent's hand by "tipping the wink" - that is, by "tapping" out a code with his eyelid. The Oxford English Dictionary states that tip is derived from the English thieves (which may be taken to mean "gambler") slang word tip, meaning "to pass from one to another" (cf. "to give unexpectedly.") The word "tip" is often inaccurately claimed to be an acronym for terms such as "to insure prompt service", "to insure proper service", "to improve performance", and "to insure promptness". However, this etymology contradicts the Oxford English Dictionary and is probably an example of a backronym. Some claim the origin for this term is a concept from Judaism, in that it was a chiyuv (obligation) for a seller to "tip the scales" in favor of the customer. The Torah says, "Nosen lo girumov (Give to him a tip)." For example, if your customer has asked for three pounds of onions, you should measure out the three pounds plus one extra onion, tipping the scale in his favor. In countries where tipping is the rule (for example United States), complicated social rules and etiquette have developed over the exact percentage to tip, and what should and should not be included in this calculation. In other cultures where tipping exists it is more flexible and no specific assumptions of the tip amount exist. Some establishments pool tips and divide them to include employees who lack customer contact. At some restaurants, agreements among the staff require the servers to tip out members of the support staff (kitchen, bartender, and busser) at the end of their shift; this means that servers pay a certain fixed percentage of their sales (most often a portion less than 15 percent of total sales) to the other staff. Thus when a patron leaves a small tip, it results in the server having to receive less from the tipping pool than other staff. Tipping is not expected when a fee is explicitly charged for the service. For example, a service charge for all patrons that is automatically added to the tab with no tipping the rule in Brazil. Bribery and corruption are sometimes disguised as tipping. In some places, police officers and other civil servants openly solicit tips, gifts and dubious fees using a variety of local euphemisms. For example, a traffic policeman in Mexico might ask a commuter to buy him a "refresco" (soft drink), while a Nigerian officer might expect "a little something for the weekend." In some jurisdictions, tipped workers qualify for a lower statutory minimum wage from the employer, and therefore may supplement deficient pay with tips. For example, the United States Internal Revenue Service (IRS) requires restaurant employers to ensure that the total tip income reported to them during any pay period is at least eight percent of their total receipts for that period. If the reported total is below eight percent, employers must allocate as income the difference between the actual tip income reported and eight percent of gross receipts. Therefore the IRS is implicitly assuming the average tip to be eight percent. Legally, tips should be reported as income for tax purposes by the recipient,

Slim Body

Now women are set to get slimming tips from the distant past. A 17th-century English manual, to be auctioned next month, has thrown light on how women maintained their shape and looks during the reign of William and Mary and offers bizarre, and often hilarious, home remedies and etiquette tips to present day women. The manual advises women to use goose grease on sagging breasts and warns against yielding too quickly to men. The Ladies` Dictionary: being a General Entertainment for the Fair Sex, published in 1694, is expected to bring about 2,000 pounds at Bonhams, the London auction house. Described as the Cosmopolitan magazine of its day, its pages include tips on dating, make-up, diet and expanding the mind. However, a large portion of the text gives advice on weight loss, with a further warning that women shouldn`t become “too thin and scragged.” To shed those extra pounds quickly, The Ladies` Dictionary advises bathing in claret wine infused with "wormwood, calamint, chamomile, sage and squinath.” Those who wish to work upon particular flabby or sagging areas were told to brew up a foul mixture of chicken and goose grease, pine, rosin, pitch and turpentine in an earthenware pot. This was then mixed with wax, cooled, applied "to the place that languishes, or does not equally thrive", and allowed to set into a plaster. The advice on wearing make-up is equally firm with the book saying, “A painted face is enough to destroy the reputation of her that uses it." Addressing the question how far to go on a first date, the book says, “Is it proper for a woman to yield at the first address? You`ll get better conditions if the enemy does not know how weak you are within.” The author of The Ladies` Dictionary is identified only as HN. "It`s an extraordinary book, offering advice to women of all classes on a wide range of subjects. You could call it the Cosmopolitan of its day,” the Daily Mail quoted Matthew Haley, a book expert at Bonhams, as saying.

Picture of plate of sushi

This is a picture of sushi - actually my favorite flavor - the J.B. Roll!

Proper Etiquette

Ladylike?

MyLotters can give the Boot!

Policing of such a large site as MyLot is a task falling largely on it's users. Bad users get the boot mainly by other users.

etiquette

etiquette this day in age