What is the problem in being single? why society still do not accept it so much?

@subha12 (18441)
India
May 27, 2008 1:56am CST
I have seen whatever be the case, single hood is still not accepted much. its mainly when you have never married.I ahve seen in our society after the person reach a certain age, if that person is not married, people ask the person or parents when he/she is going to get married. Also they ask question like why she is not getting married. For this parents are also in constant pressurizing children to marry. People should understand that few people love to be single. they are comfortable in this status? Why it is not well accepted in society? what is the scenario in your society?
14 people like this
50 responses
@plumwish07 (4057)
• Indonesia
27 May 08
its really complicated if we connected being single with the society since society already performed while we have not yet belong there as the members for them, society is way to have and sociate between one family to another family not per individual. it will be different if you able to start make some new society which consist of personal individual. but i don't take it as big deal, as like you in my hometown, few years ago i always asked when i got married since on that time the people who has similiar age with me already married and had children. now, i am married but not yet have any children yet so when i back to my hometown, the question will be when i am gonna have children since anothers already have children in elementary school thats life and we are live in society so i just smile and not too bother with it
2 people like this
@subha12 (18441)
• India
30 May 08
very nice way to lpook at it. it should be like that only. w e should not bother much.
@elaine70 (107)
• United States
30 May 08
cant keep their mouth shut.. just mind your own business ;-)
@mayka123 (16555)
• India
27 May 08
I think in the society that I live in people have stopped bothering about others. Its mainly close relatives who keep nagging the unmarried. And parents are concerned that when the unmarried person becomes old who is there to look after them?
@subha12 (18441)
• India
30 May 08
still few in the society keep snagging.
@mayka123 (16555)
• India
15 Jul 08
Thanks for the BR. Have a nice day and Happy posting.
@TerryZ (22076)
• United States
27 May 08
I know what you mean. I think its mainly the older generation that think everyone should be married. I dont feel that way. There is nothing wrong with being single. As long as your happy.
1 person likes this
@subha12 (18441)
• India
30 May 08
yes i appreciate your response. i just can't understand why it bothers them so much.
@stephcjh (38473)
• United States
27 May 08
It is very acceptable to me if a person decides not to marry someone. Most marriages do not last these days anyway. I am married but if my husband passes on before me, I will more than likely not marry again. I think I may actually like being single again. I accept people who wish to be single because marriage is not for everyone.
1 person likes this
@subha12 (18441)
• India
30 May 08
yes. why society bothers so much about others. let all live their life as they want.
@4mymak (1793)
• Malaysia
27 May 08
this kind of 'thinking' is also very common in our society... but it goes both ways.. i mean.. the single men are also questioned, and pressured if they are not married at certain age..... i guess.. ideally.. everyone just wants to see everyone happily married...
1 person likes this
@subha12 (18441)
• India
30 May 08
may be, but why they keep on pestering people.its actually makes me sick.
@lovenluck (1068)
• India
27 May 08
Our society though they call themselves developed are still in the developing phase were individual freedom is still a distant truth. We shout freedom of speech, freedom of action ,and all these things at the top of our voice but when it comes to our individual self we are neither free nor liberate. WE are shackled by a chain the chain of the society. Every thing we do are governed by our society, We do everything just taking into account the society first and not our individual interest. So even when we want to stay away from it the society starts raising an eyebrow and just for the sake of the society we need to go through it I guess. I find no other reason for it.
@subha12 (18441)
• India
30 May 08
its nice rsponse. yes, we are still not free as we claim. let people live freely they want to when they are not doing any harm.
@balasri (26537)
• India
27 May 08
Society hasn't got anything in our personal life. We decide whether we want to be single, paired or a crowd. It has nothing to do with the damn society as ling as we are not disturbing others legally. Our society is the most shameless and hypocrytic society which imposes rule only on the poor and the helpless.The so called society licks the boot of the single chief ministers or the one with double or triple wives. The moral of the story is damn the society and succeed in life. Nothing can beat success.
@subha12 (18441)
• India
30 May 08
it is also the case taht i think. no body should bother about others' personla life.
@Ohara_1983 (4117)
• Kuwait
3 Jun 08
I guess in this time being Single is no more questioned already, i heard a lot of people asking such questioned before it is not crisis but at this time the questioned have been inverted in why did he/she get married when the Country is getting worst especially when they will recognised that person who got married are not having a good worked....
1 person likes this
@MsTickle (25180)
• Australia
4 Jun 08
Please let me know if you read this. I think there is no emphasis on being single. I'm single and I'm certainly ok about it. If you mean single as in "Never Married" then I can understand where a person who is not attached can feel a bit of pressure. I think this would be emphasised if they are still living at home with their parents and not having their own life. If a single person were to have a career, their own home, or flat, and a life outside of work then I don't think they would feel there is a problem. I don't believe society feels this way. Of course, an adult male might be ok living at home with parents but I think an adult female might feel unwanted or left behind if she wanted to be married and did not have a boyfriend. But the feelings here are personal....not from society. Some parents would be happy to have their adult child around if they had a life of their own but if the adult child is not making any attempt to create a life for themselves then I think the parents would be getting anxious. Some parents would possibly look forward to when their children are gone and they have some room to move and no immediate worries about their grown up children.
1 person likes this
@whyaskq (7523)
• Singapore
27 May 08
Personally, I feel there is no problem in being single. It all depends on the individual and the community the person is in. Though there are benefits in being single, the life is not complete without a partner and family. There are some management beliefs that a single is not being able to manage life effectively. Some employers prefer to hire staffs which are married simply because they trust that a married person is better able to manage stress and situations better.
@subha12 (18441)
• India
30 May 08
actually taht may be the preference. but why singles are not allowed to live a life they want? they are not doing any harm to others.
• China
4 Jun 08
It is the same in my society, if someone at the age can marry , his/her parents will press them to get married,maybe people think a man/woman should get married , make a family ,his life is perfect!
1 person likes this
• India
27 May 08
the problem is not with the society ... the problem is in those who bother about the society ... when you are not accepted why do bother about them? Always get along with those who like you and don't even care about those who don't.
@subha12 (18441)
• India
30 May 08
its true. but when they say at your ear, you are bound to respond them.
• India
2 Jun 08
when someone says something that bad in the ear ... then i give a return to them in the ear that never talk me again or i will punch them so hard in their mouth that they will fear to speak to me later( u need not do that in action the words itself are so powerful)
• Philippines
27 May 08
Yeah...this questions also always lingers my mind WHy oh WHy in this world being Single is like a big DeaL.... for me,, we had our very Own viewpoint on how We live our lives whether to choose a married life or Not.... BUt it is said for some that each persOns greatest Achievement is to have family ....and i won't definitely agree with thaT,,It only shows that Single's are not treated Fair in the eyes of the society... Duh...for me.live what they want and I for What i want ....they are not the one who live like us to be SINGLE....*** in my own point it's better to be Single...and that's wHy i choose for living liFe...I don't need others opinion.. *jam* -live life- be natural***
@subha12 (18441)
• India
30 May 08
the singles are never seen well in society. people make rude comments and show pity.
• Lubbock, Texas
27 May 08
Society changes slowly. In the beginning women married and produced children in order to keep the family name going and to insure there was another generation and all women were expected to do this. Now the world is well populated, women are more individuals, many of them putting off marriage until they have an established career. . .or never. The point that there will be no one to care for a person without children when they are old is another consideration. My youngest daughter would get so furious with her older sisters because almost immediately after she started dating the man she married just this month, they would ask "when are you two getting married?" She felt like they didn't accept her need to know for sure she wanted to spend the rest of her life with someone before taking that leap. Both of her sisters married very young. A few times I felt like telling the older ones to back off, but since she was grown I just sympathized with her and let her handle her sisters. She waited 5 years before she married him. I guess some people are very happily married and want the same for everybody, but truthfully, not all of us are happy when we're married, and now it's more accepted in some places to remain single. Hopefully that will become more widespread eventually when people take a good look at how many people jump into marriage only to be divorced a few years later.
@subha12 (18441)
• India
30 May 08
lets hope so. i think itb will be ok soon.
@mimpi1911 (25464)
• India
16 Jul 08
I agree with you totally. We are tremendously under pressure to marry after a certain age from the family, peers and society. You cannot live in peace. You have to fight out every day. This is sad!
@carlysle (271)
• Philippines
16 Jul 08
i know.. based from the numerous response that you got.. a lot of people have been wondering about this too.. there is no problem with being single.. its just because of this "expectation" that at a certain age we should be married and have children..!!! but i think society right now is starting to realize that we have choices and if a certain person prefers to be single forever then there is no stopping him or her. =)
@applefreak (3130)
• Singapore
16 Jul 08
yes i totally agree with you. i've had people asking me that question so many times i've came up with the perfect answer. i cannot understand the preoccupation with marriage. sometimes i attribute to the fact that people just wanted to make conversation and have nothing else to say. i'm pretty lucky that my family accepts my choice. even luckier that i've got single cousins who are in their 50s. my friends also accept my choice to remain single. so rarely people will come up to me and ask about my marital status.
@applefreak (3130)
• Singapore
13 Aug 08
i am thankful that this is not the case in my country. my marital status has never been an issue with my parents. some friends do ask aout it but it's just out of concern. once they understand the reason they didn't ask again. there are people who choose to be single and have no intention to change it. this is accepted and respected here where i am. my parents also understand and never once asked if i plan to get married. of course we've sat down and talked about it. once they understand this is really what i want, they accepted my decision. cheers ;p
@chrislotz (8137)
• Canada
12 Aug 08
I have to disagree with this statement, society does accept them, here in Canada anyways. Now adays more and more people stay single but those ones are usually the ones that have been hurt and won't take a chance of being hurt again. I don't think there is anything wrong with a person who wants to stay single. It does happen more and more these days. People are relying on themselves to make them happy and don't need a partner to make them happy. Also some people are just carreer orientated and don't have time for a relationship. Whatever the reason is, it is there life and it is accepted more and more these days, in my opinion.
@maquisa (316)
• Philippines
16 Jul 08
i think single people just want to be with their family,they enjoy being alone and maybe because if your single you only think of yourself and nothing more,you just care about your future and things that revolves around them...