If you learned you are adopted, will you try to find your real parents?

Hello bingskee, I think somehow there is this notion in our minds that we would bond better with our natural parents than we have bonded with our adoptive parents. We think our natural parents would've understood us better than adoptive parents, and perhaps been less stern. To be curious about natural parents is normal. And trying to trace them down may only be a way to get more love, which we all can do with. I think with that kind of separation, the relationship between the natural mother and the child would not be perfect, and the child would soon realize the difference between the kind of love and hugs she or he is getting and was hoping for. So I would seek my natural parent, yes, to let the reality sink in.

Hello bingskee Having been raised in the foster care and not really having a mother per se. I can relate to wanting to at least know. Something about not knowing sort of leaves us with a complete void as if we do not exist, at least for me I can speak this way. Although I have met my biological mother and do not have a relationship with her, I do at least feel that I came from somewhere and also to complete the puzzling thoughts as to why we are not with them and others are. So it is to a sense just the need to know.

I've already done that. I found out when I was 12 that I was adopted. It made sense since my adoptive family treated me like an outsider. When I was 18, I thought about looking for my real parents, but didn't know how to do it. I then met someone who did know, and he hooked me up with this woman, who, after only a few days of searching, found my birth mother. When I finally met her, the stories that I'd been told about her were found to be lies. Nothing I'd been told about her or my father were true. My father is an idiot, I'll hand you that, and I want nothing to do with him. Even though I was fed lies about him, the truth was worse than the lies. I'm thankful that I got to meet my mother. She wishes all the time that she hadn't lost me and had been smarter when I was born. Who knows what kind of life I would have had if she hadn't lost me to the horrible home I'd gone to.

This question would be difficult to answer exactly when one is sure that he is NOT adopted. Probably the real adopted people would have the real exact say on this. But perhaps if I am loving my family right now then I suddenly found out I was adopted, I guess I would still want to know who my biological parents are - probably just to fill in on the curiosity. I'm sure that there will be something in me that would be intrigued with my real biological roots but I would remain thankful to God for the opportunity of a good life with adoptive parents.

I always knew i was adopted. It was my birth mom's parents that adopted us. My mom was around a lot. My dad and stepmom came around alot too.

I would probably know who they are, or were. Not that I'm ungrateful to the ones who loved me as their own, but, just something that would somehow satisfy my curiosity. I have an adopted brother, and I'm one of those who really want to find his parents. Although I don't really know if he wants this, too, so we don't insist.

Hello bingskee I would look for my real Parents but only because there could have been a very good reason why they gave me up for adoption they might have been forced to and maybe regretted it so yes I would look for them but would not be disloyal to my Adoptive Parents

i have two nieces from China and when they get old enough to care, i am sure their parents will let them know where they came from (both of them came from an ophanage)

I was adopted as a child by my father's cousin. I was told about this at a very young age. My real mother and brothers and sisters would visit me sometimes but somehow I never really got close to them. Till date I am more close to the family that adopted me than to my own family. I meet my mother just once in 2 / 3 years even though we live in the same city. And she visits me just once in 10 years or so.

I think, as an adopted child, I would be glad that my adoptive parents chose me. But I would also want to know who my birth parents are. I would not let them supplant my adoptive parents, but I would be open to a relationship with them if they wanted it.

An adopted child getting rebellious after knowing his/her adoption is something I could not understand. The adopted child should rather be thankful her adopted parents had the heart to adopt her and treat him as their own. If I were in that kind of situation, I would rather just thank and love my adopted parents even more because they cared to do what my real parents failed to do. I think I will no longer worry over my real parents for in the first place they did not worry over me either.

i would have to know just to see what id inherited from whom. and certain medical things carried with genes. i wish we could find my aunts daughter. so we could tell her how much shes missed and about the cancer that plagues our family all through it. poor lady may have already sucumbed to cancer

I had a son 21 years ago and put him up for adoption. About a year and a half ago he started looking for me and his father. I have talked to my son on the phone and through e-mail. Hopefully someday I hope we can meet. He is getting used to all I told him on why I gave him up for adoption! He is also21 and he is very much a normal 21 year old! So I am not going to rush him. When he is ready I 'll be waiting! With his father he found he also. I know he has not met him yet but they have talked on the phone. My son said he has called him repeatly on the phone! He has learned his father is a doosbag! I could of told him that but he had to learn that on his own! I know he doesn't care to meet him! When it comes to wanting to meet the real parents girls/woman do it more then the men/boys. If I was adopted I probaly would want to meet my realy paretns.

It is a hard question for anyone facing it. In my opinion, I agree with you and would say no to this question. It does no good for me to know who is my real parents since I have relied on the couple bringing me up for several decades and deep emotional relationship with them. So I will just live my life and never ask who are my real parents.

As an adopted parent and one who adopted, the idea that my children would search fir their birth mother would concern me. The point being the onus would be on the adopted child to initiate tge search. If she wanted to know her family history because diabetes runs I'n my family or where does she get her creativity from. I do have the medical history if the birth parents. What I do not like us searching to destroy the confidence if the ones who are now the parents.

I was adopted by my daddy when I was only 4. My mom is my birth mother. I was always curious about my blood family though..especially in the teen years. When I was 27 I finally met my biological dad.I didn't want him to miss out on my kid's lives like he had on mine...it's a long story - my daddy will always be my daddy and my biological father is just a nice old man who sends us birthday cards...

All that we have in this world is who we are. i think i would try to find my real parents. Knowing everything i can about myself definies who am i and who i want to be.

Well I would want to know why I was given up. If I had not made the attempt to find them, there would always be many doubts in my mind about what truly happened, what truly lead to me being given up to adoption. There is going to be an amount of curiosity in my mind, if that happened. I don't really know what I would think beyond that, but I do know that I would want plenty of good, solid answers. Of course, I might not like what I find out. There is a good chance of that happening, but there is also a good chance that their was a legit reason. Granted, if I was in that situation, it would have to be a good one. Also, it would depend on how old I am, how much of a big deal it would be. At any age, I would want something, perhaps either forming a new relationship or closing that part of my life, depending on the situation.

I will no longer look for my real parents if I learned that Iam adopted. What for?I will just be content with the parents that I have learned to love. I think knowing that someone loved me like a real daughter, That is enough.