Why Do I Always Have To Call?
By MARILYN
@Marilynda1225 (80172)
United States
September 29, 2015 11:05am CST
I have a friend that will never pick up the phone to call and say hello. We've been friends since our children were young and for all these years I'm the one who has to initiate the call. She's always happy to hear from me as I can tell by her voice. Yet, as much as she's happy to get my call it's a very rare occasion that she will call me (usually for my birthday)
Even in this day of modern technology, I have to email or text first. It's so frustrating and even though I know deep down inside that she is my dearest friend I feel bad that I'm the one who always has to initiate contact.
Do you have friends or family members like this?
10 people like this
14 responses
@swissheart (6482)
• Romania
29 Sep 15
some people are like that... I find myself in a similar situation with a friend of mine and I had no other option than to deal with it. she/he's probably not a phone person
2 people like this
@Marilynda1225 (80172)
• United States
30 Sep 15
Yes, Anna, it makes me wonder too how important I am to the other person
1 person likes this
@LadyDuck (460403)
• Switzerland
30 Sep 15
@Marilynda1225 Sometimes I am so upset that I would try not to call him for weeks and see what happens.
@much2say (53941)
• Los Angeles, California
29 Sep 15
Hate to say this, but I think I am like your friend! I'm not a phone person, but besides that, it's hard for me to talk on the phone and do things at the same time (I feel very guilty for sitting down to just talk on the phone). However, I will email, text, or send a message via Facebook to let them know I'm thinking of them and haven't fallen off the face of the earth! I do know what you're saying though - reminds me I really should go say to a few friends I haven't chatted with in a while.
1 person likes this
@Marilynda1225 (80172)
• United States
30 Sep 15
Most times I'm not even looking for a long phone call, I'd be happy with a text saying hi
1 person likes this
@Simon1223 (903)
• China
30 Sep 15
Yeah, I understand that such feelings are not that good. You may feel that you are ignored by your friend. But I wanna say it may not be the truth. Some people do not contact their friends actively just because of their characters. You may think that calling friends actively is an important sign of friendship, your friend may not have such ideas. We should judge whether he or she is a real friend of ours thoroughly, not only by one point. If you really think she is your dearest friend and take calling actively very seriously, why not talk to her directly? Maybe it's an effective way!
1 person likes this
@Marilynda1225 (80172)
• United States
30 Sep 15
My friend is definitely a "real" friend & we're more like sisters than friends actually. I've accepted that she isn't one to initiate contact but sometimes it does ruffle my feathers a bit
@ScribbledAdNauseum (104632)
• United States
30 Sep 15
Hi my name is Scribbled and yeah I do this to people. Well let's just say I am not the most talkative person in the world. However, even with that being said I find I have to be the one to instigate with my friends. It's not so much that we are intentionally avoiding each other or anything but busy lives and such. I haven't seen my friends since July and before that? well since April.
I don't know the full extent of your relationship with your friend but coming from someone who doesn't even talk to family very often if at all... Well all I'm trying to say is some people are like that, not on purpose mind.
1 person likes this
@Marilynda1225 (80172)
• United States
30 Sep 15
Yes, I agree it isn't on purpose and I've come to accept our infrequent talks but I guess sometimes it just irkes me a bit
@cahaya1983 (11120)
• Malaysia
30 Sep 15
I can imagine how frustrating that is. No matter how busy one gets I'm sure it's possible to squeeze in some time to call someone we care about. I mostly communicate with my friends on chat applications and sometimes I initiate the conversation, other times they do.
1 person likes this
@Marilynda1225 (80172)
• United States
30 Sep 15
In this day and age even a text would be appreciated
1 person likes this
@vernaC (1491)
• Romania
30 Sep 15
I've been like this too but somehow i realized also the impact of thid behavior towards my friends. They think I only call them when I need them which was true. Although in my heart they are my true frinds and I adore them, I just dont find sny topic to discuss with and stay on the phone. Then just one day I heard from a friend saying I only reach out when I need them an it was embarassing. So from then on I always try my best to reach even just dropping hi or hello in thrir inboxes.
1 person likes this
@Sheilamarie78 (2586)
• Canada
30 Sep 15
Most of my family falls into that category. It makes me wonder . . .
1 person likes this
@wetnosedogs (1533)
• United States
29 Sep 15
Some people are like that. It can be maddening.
1 person likes this
@garymarsh6 (23393)
• United Kingdom
29 Sep 15
These days I rarely have phone calls so I don't even bother answering the phone when it rings! It is usually for my wife so she answers it. I do telephone an aunt every other week though! IN fact I should do it tonight I forgot on Sunday!
1 person likes this
@BACONSTRIPSXXX (14351)
• West Haven, Connecticut
30 Sep 15
Sad to say but my sister is this way, only looks for me when she needs money but can never make a genuine phone call to see how im doing...
