Rebellion Within The Family
By DB
@dgobucks226 (34499)
April 20, 2018 2:08pm CST
I was listening to a radio call in show recently and the topic was how some parents handled older teenagers or young adults. One method mentioned was kicking them out of the house if they would not follow the rules and their behavior was no longer tolerable anymore.
That comment brings up some questions:
- Is it ever appropriate to kick your teen/young adult out of the home?
-At what age should a parent consider removing a young adult from the home?
-What would be an example of intolerable behavior for a parent to remove their child?
Do you know anyone who ever used this method to "straighten out" their kids? What circumstances led to the parents removing their teen/young adult? How did it work out?
Can kicking out a young adult ever be a good idea?
Photo- secureteen.com
8 people like this
8 responses
@AKRao24 (27424)
• India
20 Apr 18
I am from India we normally don't ask our children to leave the home unless they want to leave as that is our culture...so I can't say anything about this issue here! Thanks @dgobucks226 !
3 people like this
@dgobucks226 (34499)
•
21 Apr 18
Thanks for your reading the post and your response. In America, there are instances where young adults who act in a destructive manner in a parents home have been eventually asked to leave. In some instances it was a good thing in others not...
1 person likes this
@AKRao24 (27424)
• India
21 Apr 18
@dgobucks226 , is this thing legal act? Can the child go and complaint against the parents? Is there any specific age mentioned in the law, till when a child can stay with their parents! This is just my curiosity! Thanks!
1 person likes this
@dgobucks226 (34499)
•
22 Apr 18
@AKRao24 I am sure there is a legal age where one is no longer a minor. In the U.S. it might vary by state. In 47 of our 50 states under 18 is considered to be a minor. After that age, a parent could legally have the young adult removed for good cause.
1 person likes this
@mlgen1037 (29886)
• Manila, Philippines
20 Apr 18
Well, my dad is really not good in handling rebellion. He is really a disciplinarian and two of my siblings are really outright rebellious that led them to leave the house. It has repercussions but still I learned from the strictness of my dad. It may be wrong but still they chose to be that way.
3 people like this
@dgobucks226 (34499)
•
22 Apr 18
When living under a parents roof one must follow the rules set by them. I guess your two siblings were in disagreement over what was considered appropriate behavior.
1 person likes this
@dgobucks226 (34499)
•
24 Apr 18
@mlgen1037 Yes, sometimes leaving the home can be a good thing. It makes one take responsibility for their actions Louise. And if something bad comes of it, they have no one to blame but themselves.
2 people like this
@mlgen1037 (29886)
• Manila, Philippines
23 Apr 18
@dgobucks226 That is true, DB. They wanted their freedom so my dad let them and they turned out so so good. 
2 people like this
@celticeagle (160008)
• Boise, Idaho
21 Apr 18
Kids need to know early on what is expected of them. If they have good morals they will also have a work ethic and want to make something of themselves. Having to "kick" their kids out of the home has dysfunctional written all over it. Parents need to be onboard from day one. Kids are just like computers, they are only as good as their programmers. I think the Love and Logic books and techniques are very good. They make so much sense.
1 person likes this
@dgobucks226 (34499)
•
22 Apr 18
Excellent advice. 
Sometimes we must also look at the parents and how they are raising their kids...
Sometimes we must also look at the parents and how they are raising their kids...1 person likes this
@LadyDuck (460403)
• Switzerland
21 Apr 18
I know nobody who ever did something like this.I am not sure it is the right method, but once a teenager reaches the age of 18, I think it's normal to ask him/her to leave the house if they causes serious problems to the other members of the family. Before majority is against the law.
1 person likes this
@FayeHazel (40246)
• United States
20 Apr 18
Wow. That seems a little harsh. I think it could work, as long as done safely. (Making sure they had a sustainable place to go-something they could afford, etc) --
My dad is the opposite - I moved out at 33 because he didn't approve. He still tries to get me to move back. But then he is controlling and I am quite sure he would LOVE to have me under his thumb again.
1 person likes this
@FayeHazel (40246)
• United States
24 Apr 18
@dgobucks226 Ah yes. I (almost) wish my parents, dad in particular - were that way.
Maybe I should have eaten more. lol
Yes, you're right. At times I only look at the negative - his controlling nature. It also is a compliment of sorts too
1 person likes this
@dgobucks226 (34499)
•
22 Apr 18
Usually parents can't wait for their kids to leave the nest. Especially the big eaters, lol. You Dad loves you very much to want you to stay. I would venture to say you are excellent company for your Dad. 
1 person likes this
@dgobucks226 (34499)
•
25 Apr 18
That is a useful solution. Communication and understanding each other's views are a great approach!
1 person likes this
@KrauseHome (36448)
• United States
21 Apr 18
The main issue is when a parent kicks a child out of the house, there needs to be a Good reason or the child even if in their 20s or so can end up resenting the parents. But if the child is really disruptive and unruly then that is the time to let them go and get them out. Problem becomes especially now a days in the area I live in, things are so expensive the kids could end up homeless even with a decent job, and would you really want this for your child?
1 person likes this
@dgobucks226 (34499)
•
22 Apr 18
That is a good point about the expense of finding your own apartment. Most parents would never kick their children out if they had no place to live.
@Starmaiden (9311)
• Canada
21 Apr 18
My brothers ex girlfriend kicked her 17 year old son out because he got his girlfriend pregnant. I'm not sure if they worked it out or not.
1 person likes this
@dgobucks226 (34499)
•
22 Apr 18
Wow, that is rough for everyone involved. A tough lesson for the 17 year old in learning responsibility.
1 person likes this
