Happy Anniversary! Who is Responsible?
By patgalca
@patgalca (18481)
Orangeville, Ontario
August 5, 2018 6:53pm CST
My husband and I just celebrated our 21st wedding anniversary this past Thursday. We had both our kids before we were married so our eldest, at 4, was a shy (and crying) flower girl. Our youngest turned 1 a couple of days after (her birthday is tomorrow) raised a fuss during the ceremony so both kids ended out being taken outside by their older cousins, who really had no interest in a wedding ceremony.
Every year I get a little peeved that my daughters don't even acknowledge our wedding anniversary. Not so much as a "Happy Anniversary" in passing or in text or in response to my Facebook post. My younger daughter, now 22 (tomorrow) said, "I didn't realize children were responsible for their parents' anniversary."
Both my husband and I pointed out that they are responsible for our 25th wedding anniversary. What I should have added was that if it wasn't for us coming together, there wouldn't be them.
Do you agree with me? Do you think kids should acknowledge their parents' wedding anniversary even if in the tiniest of ways?
16 people like this
15 responses
@NJChicaa (127152)
• United States
6 Aug 18
Of course they should. That is only proper manners. But your family has some strange things going on so I'm not really surprised that your kids don't acknowledge it. My sister and I have had parties for our parents' anniversaries. We've had a special cake when it has fallen on Thanksgiving. We ALWAYS acknowledge it.
5 people like this
@patgalca (18481)
• Orangeville, Ontario
6 Aug 18
I agree that they may think along the lines of the marriage not being what looks to be a good one. But they only see part of it. In my card to my husband I wrote "thank you for sticking it out for 21 years". In his card it said "I'll always love you. Don't ever forget that."
We haven't been the best role models for loving, affectionate relationships. I've tried, he hasn't. But obviously we loved each other enough to create them and to stay together through the difficult times.
2 people like this
@patgalca (18481)
• Orangeville, Ontario
6 Aug 18
@sharon6345 Thanks. I'm sure if you read my past posts you would learn a great deal about me. 
@Deepizzaguy (122187)
• Lake Charles, Louisiana
6 Aug 18
You are correct since the children should be nice enough to say "Happy Anniversary" when it comes as a way of saying "Thank you."
2 people like this
@Shellyann36 (11383)
• United States
11 Aug 18
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY! Sorry, it's late. I think kids should acknowledge their parents anniversary. It would be nice if they offered to cook a special meal for you. Of course, it sounds as if your kids are still a bit young. Don't worry they will grow out of the selfish "ME" phase.
1 person likes this
@patgalca (18481)
• Orangeville, Ontario
14 Aug 18
@Shellyann36 29??? My husband always says they'll realize when they become parents. Uh, don't want to wait that long. My younger daughter is better because she has been living away at university for four years so she helps out more. But only acknowledged they anniversary when prompted.
1 person likes this
@Shellyann36 (11383)
• United States
13 Aug 18
@patgalca They are still very self-absorbed at that age. They will realize it when they get older. My older 3 are all boys so they obviously mature slower than girls and there are still times when they are still very self-absorbed. I often wonder if my 29-year-old will ever outgrow it.
1 person likes this
@RasmaSandra (98033)
• Daytona Beach, Florida
6 Aug 18
I think that children should definitely acknowledge their parents anniversaries. That is why there are anniversary cards. A gift is not always necessary just on the major anniversaries but surely once or twice taking them to dinner or making them dinner things like that. Anyway, Happy Anniversary and many more years of love. A friend of mine on Facebook just celebrated her 49th anniversary.
2 people like this
@bunnybon7 (50970)
• Holiday, Florida
8 Aug 18
they should but non do as they should any more. 2 of mine are so absorbed in their own affairs to even acknowledge mothers day or birthday. lol
@1hopefulman (45111)
• Canada
6 Aug 18
Happy anniversary! 
I definitely think that children should acknowledge their parents anniversary in some way. 
I definitely think that children should acknowledge their parents anniversary in some way. 1 person likes this
@Marilynda1225 (91116)
• United States
6 Aug 18
I would think they would at least say Happy Anniversary
1 person likes this
@patgalca (18481)
• Orangeville, Ontario
6 Aug 18
Thank you. My younger daughter texted me on Thursday (our anniversary) making requests for her birthday on Monday. I literally typed in my text back "Happy Anniversary Mom". She texted me back apologizing saying that she kept forgetting. And she's supposed to be the nice one. 
1 person likes this
@Starmaiden (9308)
• Canada
6 Aug 18
I always remembered my mother and stepfather's anniversary and wished them in some small way a happy one. My stepfather passed away the day before their 25th wedding anniversary. 
1 person likes this
@patgalca (18481)
• Orangeville, Ontario
6 Aug 18
We were preparing to celebrate my parents' 60th wedding anniversary when my father passed away suddenly. My sister had already sent the requests for acknowledgement to the Queen and the Prime Minister. One couldn't be stopped so my mother still got the acknowledgement for the 60 years of marriage even though my father was no longer with her. I had gone into a party shop looking for 60th anniversary decorations and could find none. I said to the woman, "Why nothing for 60th? Do people think they don't live that long?" Feel like I dug my own father's grave for making that statement.
1 person likes this
@ScribbledAdNauseum (104615)
• United States
6 Aug 18
My parents were never married.
We never really said much to the grandparents either.
I think it's common decency to acknowledge it atleast.
