Change of Plans
By Kareng
@kareng (80243)
United States
July 26, 2019 9:58pm CST
If you read my earlier posts today, you know that we had planned on going to my mom's house today. That didn't happen.
Why? My mom was feeling off and was feeling very paranoid. I called one of her doctors who advised me to take her to primary care doctor or Urgent Care facility to be tested for UTI. Since her primary care doctor closes at noon on Fridays, I took her to Urgent Care in McComb, MS.
This was much easier and faster than driving to Baton Rouge. McComb is only about 30 minutes from my house.
It turned out she did not have a UTI, but was borderline in being dehydrated. I always keep a glass of water with her and as the old saying goes, "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make them drink" applies here.
I'll have to monitor her drinking better and watch those enclosed travel mugs when we are going to Baton Rouge.
As for being "off" today, my mom was very paranoid this morning and afraid. I had a long talk with one of the counselors today and we will be going back in Monday to see what can be done. I asked about speeding up the claims with Elderly Abuse and we talked about a possible Elder Protection Order being put in place and letting law enforcement take care of the fraud since it is now at a high level and a federal offense.
This has me feeling better and that an end would come faster, but on the other hand my mother will more than likely be blaming me.
Photo: Pixaby, public domain
16 people like this
18 responses
@wolfgirl569 (135744)
• Marion, Ohio
27 Jul 19
Just try to be there for her as things happen. Just think of how you would feel in her place and go from there. It has to be scary and hurtful to think of how he has and still is acting.
2 people like this
@kareng (80243)
• United States
27 Jul 19
That's the hard part because one minute she wants her house and then the next she is scared and says she will just stay with me. We have told her that we will never leave her alone with him. I think she is better off here anyway until all of this blows. He is forging checks now. The bank knows it. We just have to get mom's SS check moved and close it out and he can be picked up. I didn't think he was that stupid but he has proved it now. I don't think there is anything my mom can do now. If he writes a check out to himself and cashes it at the bank, the bank can go after him or any store. It's all electronic now, so bingo.
1 person likes this
@wolfgirl569 (135744)
• Marion, Ohio
27 Jul 19
@kareng If she is willing to wait then that is the safest thing to do. He prolly will not try as much at your house. Hopefully they do prosecute if he writes more checks. Fingers crossed it dont take long for him to mess up.
1 person likes this
@kareng (80243)
• United States
27 Jul 19
@wolfgirl569 It won't. They tested the waters and nothing happened to them so they will be taking full advantage of free money (so they think) now.
1 person likes this
@crazyhorseladycx (39503)
• United States
27 Jul 19
so glad she'd not a u.t.i, that dehydration can sure get'cha off kilter. ya might need to put some flavorin'n such to 'ncourage 'er to drink more?
i'm actually relieved ya'll didn't go to her house to spend the night, hon. been worryin' 'bout 't all day, coz ya jest dunno what that brother'n bunch'll do. i hope they do help get'n elder protection order done a.s.a.p. hopefully y'all can get't all sorted soon'n those 2 (3?) be put 'hind bars, where they belong.
if'n yer momma blames ya fer such, jest let't slide, hon. they've been brainwashin' 'er 'n takin' 'dvantage fer quite some years. think 'f 't like 'regular' domestic violence. dang, i feel so bad fer y'all, particularly yer momma :(
1 person likes this
@kareng (80243)
• United States
27 Jul 19
I gave her flavored water last night. I think I will give her some Gatorade this afternoon. She is depressed today. Already had a nap while I helped hubby outside this morning. I got her up for lunch and she's watching television now and I"m drained and needing a nap. I am relaxing right now and may try to get a short nap.
1 person likes this
@kareng (80243)
• United States
31 Jul 19
@crazyhorseladycx No time for a nap here. She has been doing better for the last couple of days. Today has been a bit off, but not too bad.
1 person likes this
@crazyhorseladycx (39503)
• United States
28 Jul 19
@kareng bless her heart, i'm hopin' 'tis jest from the dehdration 'n not all that other schtuff y'all 're goin' through hope ya got that nap!
1 person likes this
@infatuatedbby (94909)
• United States
27 Jul 19
Oh no! I hope your mom gets better. Do keep her hydrated!
1 person likes this
@kareng (80243)
• United States
30 Jul 19
@infatuatedbby Yep, my mom hesitates because she doesn't like going to the bathroom over and over. She is also on a fluid pill.
1 person likes this
@infatuatedbby (94909)
• United States
27 Jul 19
@kareng I can relate, but my grandpa - he is not a fan of water. My relatives have to watch him drink to make sure he's hydrated
1 person likes this
@Hate2Iron (15724)
• Canada
27 Jul 19
My mom went through this as well and it is heart breaking. She was sure that there were shackles around her ankles at the nursing home. I could have cried!
1 person likes this
@just4him (323168)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
27 Jul 19
I'm glad it wasn't UTI, but dehydration is no better. I hope she starts drinking more.
I'm glad things are moving with the elder abuse claims and Elder Protection Order. I hope it puts an end to the problems you have with your brother.
I hope she doesn't blame you.
1 person likes this
@kareng (80243)
• United States
27 Jul 19
Dehydration can also set off the mood swings and paranoia. It explains her behavior yesterday. I'm glad I put in a call to the doctor.
We will be talking with the folks at the Mental Health Clinic tomorrow about the protection order. If they feel it is necessary, it will be done. My mom cannot object. It is a state office and their job is to protect her.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (128835)
• Gainesville, Florida
27 Jul 19
She may try to blame you, but you are looking out for her best interests and also trying to fix all the wrongs that are going on. Sometimes we have to suffer in the short-term in order to fix everything for the long-term.
1 person likes this
@sallypup (69176)
• Centralia, Washington
27 Jul 19
I believe paranoia is part of dementia. In your Mom's case she has reason to worry. My Mom at times acted pretty mean. I think it was cause she knew her mind was slipping away. I sure am glad you talked to authorities about the brother issue.
1 person likes this
@kareng (80243)
• United States
27 Jul 19
Well, he called them on me last week. Said I had no right to change the locks on the house when I caught the unauthorized person (his girlfriend's oldest son) sleeping inside. Then he claimed I stole tools. The cop dismissed it all after talking with me. Working with the bank now and as soon as I can get my mother's social security check for Aug in there, it is transferred and the account is closed. Then he or they will be picked up for writing unauthorized checks and also forgery. This is the day I'm waiting for.
1 person likes this
@LindaOHio (222302)
• United States
27 Jul 19
Just try and be there for her. You are doing everything you can for her and are to be commended for the care that you give her. Try and have a good day! Hugs.
1 person likes this
@kareng (80243)
• United States
27 Jul 19
She is under the care of her primary doctor, cardiologist, neuromedical center and mental health clinic. So far she likes all the people we are working with and is opening up to them. I am hoping that someone can make her understand that they need to be behind bars. They have been abusing her for a couple of years now and it is time for it to end.
1 person likes this
@Starkinds (32737)
• India
27 Jul 19
@kareng oh I'm sorry I doesn't mean that. I mean your mother's discomfortness.
@GardenGerty (169474)
• United States
28 Jul 19
Often dehydration and a UTI are to blame for many problems of the elderly. I am glad they thought to have her tested. Of course her situation is compounded by the abuse she has gone through. I am glad that you can get some help from law enforcement. Yes, she will blame you and just like with our kids it is important to take care of our vulnerable elderly. Sorry you had this happen today.
@Michellekidwell (29953)
• Sonora, California
27 Jul 19
I am so sorry you are going through this, but you have her best interest at heart!
1 person likes this
@Miss_Leafy (4296)
• Colombia
27 Jul 19
Your mom only need your love and attention. You're doing so good in taking care of her.
1 person likes this
