My brother in law seems to be very ill.

@marguicha (180187)
Chile
November 24, 2021 3:47pm CST
Some time ago he was discovered to have colon cancer. Two weeks ago they came to Santiago and he had surgery. I have not been invited to visit him and I won´t ask as he erased me from the family several years ago without my knowledge about what I had done wrong. That´s a long story and I won´t get into it. Still, I love my sister and when they come, she comes to my house alone for a short while. She was going to take a small walk with me today but she called it off as my BIL was not feeling well. And she told me that they would have to be here at least 3 more months. As I see it (I did not ask) my BIL will need other procedures besides the surgery. I´m sorry for him. And I hope that my sister knows that I am here for her.
19 people like this
20 responses
@LindaOHio (78716)
• United States
25 Nov
I'm sorry to hear this; and I'm sorry you are not on good terms with him.
2 people like this
@marguicha (180187)
• Chile
25 Nov
He is not in good terms with me. I never knew what he did not like. And he sent my sister to tell me that I was not welcomed to his house. My sister told me over the phone crying. And I told her not to worry, we knew that we loved each other. That was years ago but things did not change even when I had cancer.
2 people like this
@LindaOHio (78716)
• United States
25 Nov
@marguicha That's so sad. So many families are dysfunctional.
1 person likes this
@marguicha (180187)
• Chile
25 Nov
@LindaOHio I was lucky with my husband. But both of my daughters did not have good partners and now they are alone.
1 person likes this
@LadyDuck (367004)
• Switzerland
25 Nov
I am sorry, but I am sure that your sister knows that you are there for her.
2 people like this
@marguicha (180187)
• Chile
25 Nov
I know that she knows. Same as I knew that she was for me years ago even when my BIL decided to sort of disown me without my ever knowing why.
2 people like this
@LadyDuck (367004)
• Switzerland
25 Nov
@marguicha This is something that I cannot understand, but I know this happens and it is sad.
1 person likes this
@marguicha (180187)
• Chile
25 Nov
@LadyDuck He managed to turn against me part of my family. Even my brother told me why didn´t I "change". I told him then that we did not have to be friends but that we still were family. This was sad because I love my sister. And I know that she loves me. I want him to get well, but my heart goes for my sister more than for him. He had a possibility of mending things when I had cancer. And he didn´t. So be it. I was lucky to be "adopted" by my closest friends.
1 person likes this
@Faster16 (578)
• Indonesia
25 Nov
visiting a sick person does not need an invitation.
1 person likes this
@marguicha (180187)
• Chile
25 Nov
It depends. I´m not welcome where he is and I´m apparently not welcome by him.
1 person likes this
@Faster16 (578)
• Indonesia
25 Nov
@marguicha oh i see
1 person likes this
@marguicha (180187)
• Chile
25 Nov
@Faster16 But I call my sister and she knows I´m here for her.
1 person likes this
@Courtlynn (70391)
• United States
25 Nov
Sorry he was a jerk and took you out of his family.
1 person likes this
@marguicha (180187)
• Chile
25 Nov
His loss. I found an adoptive family, my friends Dixie and Humberto. I want him to get well of course, but I´m not invited to visit him.
1 person likes this
@Courtlynn (70391)
• United States
25 Nov
@marguicha right. Glad you have a real family with your friends
@RubyHawk (44585)
• Atlanta, Georgia
25 Nov
I hope your brother in law recovers and lives a long life.
1 person likes this
@marguicha (180187)
• Chile
25 Nov
I sincerely hope so. For my dear sister´s sake.
1 person likes this
@RubyHawk (44585)
• Atlanta, Georgia
25 Nov
@marguicha So do I. I’m sending them my best wishes.
@rebelann (92224)
• El Paso, Texas
25 Nov
I know your sister is totally aware that you are there for her. Sadly the dispute your BIL has towards you is hard on her as well.
1 person likes this
@marguicha (180187)
• Chile
25 Nov
Many years ago, when she told me crying over the phone that my BIL did not want to ever see me again, I told her that I knew she loved me and that she had to stay at his side.
1 person likes this
@rebelann (92224)
• El Paso, Texas
25 Nov
That's sad.
@Happy2BeMe (95610)
• Canada
24 Nov
I am sorry he is not well. All you can do it be there for her. She needs yoir support.
1 person likes this
@Happy2BeMe (95610)
• Canada
25 Nov
1 person likes this
@Hannihar (119135)
• Israel
25 Nov
@marguicha That is too bad about your brother-in-law and sad that he does not consider you to be part of the family. I hope she knows you are there for her to with what is going on with her husband.
1 person likes this
@marguicha (180187)
• Chile
17h
My sister and I have no problems between each other.
@Shiva49 (23398)
• Singapore
25 Nov
At times, we are led into such unpleasant relationships. Hope he gets well soon.
1 person likes this
@marguicha (180187)
• Chile
17h
Thank you very much.
1 person likes this
@CarolDM (162868)
• United States
25 Nov
Thoughts are with you all and hoping for a good recovery.
1 person likes this
@marguicha (180187)
• Chile
25 Nov
I hope so too.
1 person likes this
@Shavkat (118737)
• Philippines
25 Nov
I hope he will be fine soon.
1 person likes this
@marguicha (180187)
• Chile
25 Nov
From what my sister told me yesterday by phone they will be staying 3 months here.
@Junbals (1330)
• Philippines
25 Nov
Closure is one of the most important part of relationship. I have a sister who also erased me from her life for no reason at all. Like me, she is also diabetic, sickly that is.
1 person likes this
@marguicha (180187)
• Chile
25 Nov
At this time of my life, my relation with my BIL has to do only if it matters to my sister. I had cancer and chemo and he did not come over to mend anything. So be it.
• Philippines
25 Nov
I am so sorry to hear about your BIL. The best thing you can do is to be there for them during this trying time
1 person likes this
@marguicha (180187)
• Chile
25 Nov
I am here for my sister.
@wolfgirl569 (51485)
• Marion, Ohio
25 Nov
Just be there for her.
1 person likes this
@marguicha (180187)
• Chile
25 Nov
Exactly. And she knows that.
1 person likes this
@RasmaSandra (48733)
• Daytona Beach, Florida
25 Nov
That is very sad news no matter what, I will put him in my prayers and I wish all the best for your sister,
1 person likes this
@marguicha (180187)
• Chile
25 Nov
Please do. One thing has nothing to do with the other.
1 person likes this
@JudyEv (258521)
• Rockingham, Australia
25 Nov
That is sad for your sister - and for your BIL, of course. Hopefully, you will be able to meet up with her soon.
1 person likes this
@marguicha (180187)
• Chile
25 Nov
She will come as soon as she can, I know.
1 person likes this
@Deepizzaguy (57817)
• Lake Charles, Louisiana
24 Nov
I am deeply sorry to learn that your brother in law is ill. I will hope and pray for his recovery.
1 person likes this
@marguicha (180187)
• Chile
25 Nov
I hope so.
1 person likes this
@1creekgirl (28382)
• United States
24 Nov
That's a tough situation. It's good your sister knows you'll be there for her.
1 person likes this
@marguicha (180187)
• Chile
25 Nov
We are not as near as we were because my BIL broke relations with me. But she knows that I´m with her.
1 person likes this
@Juliaacv (60218)
• Canada
24 Nov
I'm sorry that he is ill. Continue to support and love your sister, she's going to need alot of that in the days to come.
1 person likes this
@marguicha (180187)
• Chile
24 Nov
That´s exactly what I will do.
1 person likes this
@LeaPea2417 (32325)
• Toccoa, Georgia
24 Nov
That's sad. Prayers for him.
1 person likes this
@marguicha (180187)
• Chile
24 Nov
Thank you.