The Dilemma

@YrNemo (20261)
March 19, 2023 1:37am CST
If you had a staff member who wanted to leave the company after causing a lot of disruptions to the team, and that specific person then asked you to be her referee, what would you do? -warn the new potential boss of the danger (and risk being stuck with that member until whenever), or -give a wonderful recommendation (a lie, but you ended up saving your team). At the end of the day, hiring a new staff based on recommendations of strangers is a real risky business isn't it.
16 people like this
16 responses
@DaddyEvil (137145)
• United States
19 Mar 23
I would tell them I couldn't give an honest recommendation but they were welcome to quit before I had to fire them. As a matter of fact, I did tell a person that once. They chose to quit.
5 people like this
@YrNemo (20261)
19 Mar 23
for private company, guess you can fire staff. If it is for government coorperation, everything links to contract and everything becomes complicated.
4 people like this
@DaddyEvil (137145)
• United States
19 Mar 23
@YrNemo I don't know. I've never worked under contract.
3 people like this
@florelway (23112)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
19 Mar 23
In my organisation I don't get to choose my staff because the head of the agency just assign them to my office. But I did one big blow to the head when I told him that the person is more of a liability than an asset and I don't want to spend and waste time training her.
3 people like this
@YrNemo (20261)
20 Mar 23
Good on you.
2 people like this
@florelway (23112)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
20 Mar 23
2 people like this
@shaggin (71664)
• United States
19 Mar 23
Yikes I really don’t know what I would do. I would want to be fully honest but would feel bad at the same time.
3 people like this
@Shavkat (137214)
• Philippines
19 Mar 23
If I were her boss, I will not give her a recommendation letter.
3 people like this
@YrNemo (20261)
19 Mar 23
but you would be stuck with her! As it is, I think one of my new colleagues's previous company was so relieved to say goodbye to her, that they did whatever it took just to see her gone. (She didn't like her former colleagues either, so it was mutual.)
1 person likes this
@LadyDuck (457972)
• Switzerland
19 Mar 23
I would tell them that I do not feel comfortable writing a recommendation, go ask to someone else.
2 people like this
@YrNemo (20261)
19 Mar 23
2 people like this
@wolfgirl569 (95105)
• Marion, Ohio
19 Mar 23
What DE said
2 people like this
@allknowing (130066)
• India
20 Mar 23
If I was fully aware of the wrong doings and then I am asked to give a recommendation I would never be able to do it.
1 person likes this
@quantum2020 (12040)
• Ciudad De Mexico, Mexico
21 Mar 23
I simply would not give a recommendation. That person would have to start a new job without my recommendation
@YrNemo (20261)
25 Mar 23
but then you would have to have that staff with you forever...
1 person likes this
@sjvg1976 (41131)
• Delhi, India
19 Mar 23
It's a tough situation to decide but I will choose the second option.
2 people like this
@jstory07 (134422)
• Roseburg, Oregon
19 Mar 23
You have to decide what is best for you to do. I would not do it.
1 person likes this
@YrNemo (20261)
19 Mar 23
but you would have that staff with you forever. (Unless that staff memeber really really wanted to leave...)
1 person likes this
@rakski (112925)
• Philippines
19 Mar 23
Maybe you should be honest with all the people concern
2 people like this
@just4him (306049)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
20 Mar 23
I wouldn't give a reference for a person who caused trouble.
1 person likes this
@just4him (306049)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
25 Mar 23
@YrNemo Life has a way of working out the details. I doubt she would last long in her current job.
@YrNemo (20261)
25 Mar 23
Even if by doing so (not being her referee), you would end up having her as your colleague/staff forever?
1 person likes this
• Philippines
19 Mar 23
It sounds like she will be bouncing around (as you said the other company was relieved to get rid of her) until there's nowhere for her to transfer to and/or she decides to leave the whole organization or retire early.
2 people like this
• Southend-On-Sea, England
20 Mar 23
I would recommend a wonderful recommendation.
1 person likes this
@YrNemo (20261)
25 Mar 23
Me too - see, that staff would end up becoming someone else's problem, not yours any more....
1 person likes this
@much2say (53960)
• Los Angeles, California
26 Mar 23
I think I would ask this person just what did they expect me to say about them . . . make them answer/review themselves. I would then respond to their self-review honestly - and they can squirm knowing you probably won't do it at that point .
@sol_cee (38223)
• Philippines
19 Mar 23
Referee? I think blackmailer loll
1 person likes this