Seeing It Wrong
September 21, 2023 11:03am CST
A couple of months ago, I was sitting in my dad’s living room, and he made a comment about a question I had texted him some days prior. I just sat there, with my mouth open, stunned that his conclusion to why I asked him the innocent question, had been interpreted the way he saw it. I continued to sit, staring, until his wife walked into the room. I told her about his conclusion to my question, and SHE proceeded to stare at him, unable to process how he jumped to the conclusion he jumped to. Nothing we said could convince him what he thought was just incorrect. He had every right to feel the way he felt, but the facts were simply that he was mistaken (a few weeks later he came to his senses). It bothered me that he didn’t see the truth, but then I realized it wasn’t my job to convince him. People are going to believe what they want, and you can’t help it. Sometimes it is confusing as to why they think and act upon things, but I try to remember I don’t know what else is going on in their lives to shape their thinking. We just have to accept they made a choice to only see something one way, and it isn’t yours. Do you have any examples of this in your life?
20 people like this
• United States
That happens a lot... Sometimes I have to sit down and try to explain why I say or do something the way I do when Pretty gets upset and then listen to what she thought I said or thought I meant. We're getting better at communicating but it's still odd to me that she doesn't automatically understand my reasoning. She's lived with me since she was born... People can be strange.
3 people like this
• United States
I can't think of any concrete examples,but I am certain it has happened to me before. Is it possible your dad's age has something to do with how he is viewing the situation? Of course he isn't terribly old, but older people tend to have a certain rigidity in their thinking .and sadly, I probably even include my self in this
I guess I would have to hear his conclusion to your question to know if his response was jaw opening. I think opinions and the way people perceive things can be formed through many different ways. One that comes to mind is age differences as your father and you come from different generations. Others might be backgrounds, life experiences and beliefs/values. One example I remember is my dad and I disagreeing about our involvement in the Vietnam War.
That happens a lot. It really bothers me a lot when it happens but nowadays I'm trying to convince myself that it doesn't matter and trying to convince someone because in the end they have their own beliefs and act upon it. My hubby and I go through this a lot and after weeks and months, he comes to me saying remember you said this to me on that day It turned out you were right.
• United States
When it comes to politics, yes, many people see things differently than I do...but I don't waste time arguing with them about why they should see things my way. Life is way to short for the time that would gouge out of my life, and the aggravation that would also cause them and me! I am glad he came to his senses.