Sharing with you my entry poem for the Poetry International Contests

My poem
@cacay1 (83220)
Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
December 25, 2023 1:52am CST
I am glad to share woth you my entry for the poetry international contest. I need your feedback, my dear friends. GREEN, GREEN GRASSES Green, green grasses, you delight my heart You look magnificent and are glorified by your pure scent Tempests may come and go, but you always renew Are you shy and timid, or just a semblance of purity? Your ancestors may turn brown and be buried in the ground But your descendants emerge from the golden and scattered roots The sunshine is your source of strength, and the wind is your breath The rain is your powerful friend that lets you sustain You may be small or tall, but you are vast and wonderful People may dislike, ignore, or want to erase you from their sights But they do not know your might, and you fight But you understand their fright Your thorns are razor-sharp, and your leaves itch their skin That could create a deep wound But for the animals, you are so tender, not a foe Green, green grasses insects play hide-and-seek Even snakes adore your shades and turn their skin green to help you mend From the cruelties of the passers spitting, throwing, burning, and thumping you in madness Green, green grasses; I see the dewdrops They are like teardrops, pure and clean You amaze my soul once in a while You refreshed me and constantly swayed your leaves in love I want to touch your leaves and smell your hay Wishing someone would create a road at the center of your solitude To feel the presence of humans who are not all unkind and toxic Some of your generations serve as food for hungry birds Pricking your sweet leaves and gently devouring the sip Some of your kind have hard-to-trip bodies covered with itchy prunes Some people want to see you invisible; their eyes are blind to seeing you cure Your breath, people breathe the air that carries them to their lungs They do not see or feel it, but disregard the source and origin From the green, green grasses that exude life Green, green grasses, you embrace the earth, the universe of mankind You cover the land, but your residue returns to the now-barren fields The impact is so rare because you fertilize the land, the source of life You adorn the land untilled by its owner Bad occupants retreat, for you are there with vast accomplices That withdraws the whims of the intruders They cannot eradicate you with their filthy hands You are magnificent, it is hard to uproot your roots with their bare hands The smoke may spread, putting people at risk if intruders use force to burn Thus making the scene fantastic, the real owners will be quick to rescue you Bad elements may seek help by hiding in your thick shadows But your thorns and itchy leaves denied their refuge and made an exit Green, green, grasses, you serve many purposes One thing humans must not forget to assess That you are the semblance of life, hope, and prosperity You are a true creation of God, the immortal One And as you kiss the setting sun, your remnants follow your footsteps Helping humans to feel life, aspire to hope, and enjoy abundance till eternity You are the East and the West conspired by the South and the North That is how vast you are in the universe of the immortals Storms may rock you, but they can never carry you away From the face of the earth to serve humanity You may be wrecked, but the next day you will be green and green again Becauseā€¦. You are LIFE.
10 people like this
11 responses
@LadyDuck (458648)
• Switzerland
25 Dec
You wrote a beautiful poem, I like it a lot, congratulations.
4 people like this
@LadyDuck (458648)
• Switzerland
26 Dec
@cacay1 Writing a good poem takes a lot of effort and also a lot of time.
4 people like this
@cacay1 (83220)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
26 Dec
@LadyDuck , Thank you, Anna I love you.It took me 5 days to finish this .
4 people like this
@cacay1 (83220)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
26 Dec
@LadyDuck yes, that is so right, I almost drain my brain
4 people like this
@simplfred (20641)
• Philippines
25 Dec
Nice poem, my friend. Goodluck.
4 people like this
@cacay1 (83220)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
26 Dec
@simplfred thank you, my friend, why dont you join next year? First prize is $2000.
4 people like this
@simplfred (20641)
• Philippines
27 Dec
@cacay1 What is the name of the site, my friend?
2 people like this
@cacay1 (83220)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
27 Dec
@simplfred, thank you so much my friend.
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (159309)
• Boise, Idaho
25 Dec
Well, good luck. You have written quite a nice poem.
3 people like this
@celticeagle (159309)
• Boise, Idaho
27 Dec
@cacay1 .......Don't forget to do a final edit before you send it in.
2 people like this
@cacay1 (83220)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
27 Dec
@celticeagle oh yeah I have editing tools Wordy Quilbot, Grammarly and Chat bot.
2 people like this
@cacay1 (83220)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
26 Dec
@celticeagle , thank you, it took me 5 days to finish this.
4 people like this
@RebeccasFarm (86787)
• United States
25 Dec
I love this Erly, I hope you win!!! The poem reminds me of God's creations for us to enjoy. It is very spiritual, the spirit of the Earth moving. Happy Christmas to you and yours.
4 people like this
@cacay1 (83220)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
26 Dec
@RebeccasFarm, thank you my friend. I am glad you feel what I feel.
4 people like this
@dya80dya (33641)
25 Dec
I like this poem a lot. I can't understand people who can't stand grass.
4 people like this
@cacay1 (83220)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
26 Dec
@dya80dya,Thank you so much for feeling me. Some people don't appreciate nature.
3 people like this
@Rimps85 (1100)
• India
25 Dec
All the Best!!
3 people like this
@cacay1 (83220)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
26 Dec
@Rimps85, thank you, friend.
3 people like this
@cacay1 (83220)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
27 Dec
@Rimps85 (1100)
• India
26 Dec
1 person likes this
@popciclecold (35294)
• United States
25 Dec
I could never have thought about all that for grass You did a very good job. I tip my hat to you.
3 people like this
@cacay1 (83220)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
26 Dec
@popciclecold, thank you so much, my friend.
3 people like this
@jstory07 (134490)
• Roseburg, Oregon
25 Dec
The poem that you wrote is very nice. I liked it.
3 people like this
@jstory07 (134490)
• Roseburg, Oregon
26 Dec
@cacay1 I hope you had a good Christmas.
3 people like this
@cacay1 (83220)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
27 Dec
@jstory07 yes I had thanks Judy.
2 people like this
@cacay1 (83220)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
26 Dec
@jstory07 ,thank you, Judy. God Bless you and your family.
3 people like this
@RasmaSandra (73603)
• Daytona Beach, Florida
30 Dec
This is a wonderful poem, nicely penned, inspirational, and full of hope, Best of luck to you winning the contest,
1 person likes this
@innertalks (21042)
• Australia
29 Dec
The picturing forth from the poem is good, and we get great images from the sculptured writing, and yet for me, I prefer more consistency of verse, and line length, with punctuation intact too. I guess it is a style of writing poetry, not to include full stops, or commas, at the end of lines. It gives each line more connective urgency, I guess. And yet some connectivity is lost by using capitals to start every line, instead of using a comma at the end of a line to join some lines dually, instead of leaving them all separated by the capital letters. A poem is hard to read without enough punctuation, and hard for me to feel the rhythm, when verse, and line lengths, differ quite a bit too. The poem is also a bit too long for me, and it comes across as more a ballad, or prose writing. That's only my feedback, anyway. The word images created in your poem are all very good.
1 person likes this
@cacay1 (83220)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
30 Dec
@innertalks, that's a contest and a requirement. We're only following the instructions.
1 person likes this
@cacay1 (83220)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
31 Dec
@innertalks, that's write I've written 800 poems of medium length but for a blog requirement, I've to follow to write a poem with 3,000 words but the pay was right.
1 person likes this
@innertalks (21042)
• Australia
30 Dec
@cacay1 Oh, well, yes, you do need to stick to the rules, and requirements for the contest.
1 person likes this
@Rashnag (30594)
• Surat, India
28 Dec
It's wonderful poem. All the best for the contest
2 people like this
@cacay1 (83220)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
30 Dec
@RasmaSandra thanks Ras.
3 people like this