All in a day’s flying.

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It’s good to be back on my own toilet and in my own bed. We flew out of Rennes at 16.00 hours, got to Dublin two hours later then drove up to lovely Larne. Not since the 70s have I flown in such a tatty airplane - that was on Soviet era Aeroflot planes when whether you arrived at your expected destination was determined by the toss of a coin. I was flying with Emerald Airlines, an Irish regional job, and everything I touched came off in my hands. Fortunately I didn’t get to touch the wings. All sorts of bits came adrift during our time in the air, especially bit of the seat and arm rests. Other bits were taped on. All very shoddy. The plane was one of those propellor jobs that seems to work on the principal that the more noise it makes the more likely it will lift off the ground and stay up. A truly buttock-clenching ride. Cabin crew started to make announcements then stopped half way through to do something else then picked up the announcement at the same place. One such announcement was “If any passenger’s destination today is not Dublin please inform staff”. But we were already airborne by the time that particular message was relayed to us. And the front door of the plane was at the back. Oh yes it was, so that’s where the best seats were. We were in the back row so got of first. The toilet was a disgrace. How anyone was expected to turn round and lower themselves onto the seat is beyond me. Any one of even slightly greater girth than average would really have needed to perform with the door open. But at least this tired old plane had a toilet. When we were checking in I noticed at the next desk an alarming, hand-scrawled notice letting passengers know that on the flight from Rennes to Toulouse there was no toilet. That’s just asking for trouble. Very bumpy flight.