Should there be a dress code?
By Fleur
@Fleura (32567)
United Kingdom
September 5, 2025 5:08am CST
We’ve been to a few music events this summer and they are all very welcoming and inclusive and non-judgemental on the whole. So maybe it’s just me that’s turning into a grumpy old woman. But I’m starting to think there should be some sort of dress code!
At one event there were a few noticeable trans people. One in particular, a trans man, could not resist showing of his/her new ‘status’ as it were. The weather was pleasant, though not hot, with sunny intervals, but basically every time the sun came out this person just had to whip off their top to flaunt their ‘top surgery’ scars.
Now I certainly understand the frustration of being a woman and being constrained by society to cover up when men are allowed to enjoy the feel of the sunshine on their upper bodies, but still – there were no actual men going topless on this occasion. And while body positivity after mastectomy is to be welcomed, when someone has needed to undergo life-saving surgery and has to adjust to accepting their changed body, I’m not so much in favour of showing off the scars of surgery that has been performed for what might be considered unnecessary reasons. Mutilating a healthy body is not something that should be promoted as ‘cool’.
At another event where the weather was hot and sunny, the man in the picture decided that he wanted to enjoy the feeling of the sun on his bare skin. Now again, body positivity and all that… still, I have to say that he wasn’t a pretty sight. Not only did his huge belly sag over his shorts at the front, but the shorts themselves looked as though they were about to drop off at any moment, displaying an extent of ‘cleavage’ at the back. Of course you could say that I shouldn’t be looking, but given that he was dancing about right in front of us it was hard not to!
Would a dress code be a step too far?
All rights reserved. © Text and image copyright Fleur 2025.
7 people like this
7 responses
@porwest (107490)
• United States
5 Sep
Perhaps a bit off topic, but still in context with your post...one thing about trans people is that they are trying WAY TOO HARD to be something they are not, which sort of flies in the face of what they are trying to accomplish. The more they try, the less like what they want to be they actually look, and so...
Everything gets lost in translation and all they wind up accomplishing is looking like an obvious wannabe. REAL men and women blend into the crowd. FAKE men and women stand out like a sore thumb.
1 person likes this
@xFiacre (14337)
• Ireland
5 Sep
@fleura when I was still a Church minister I went to visit someone in hospital - a trans man. (This was 25 years ago in sheltered Belfast so he was a bit of an oddity). I knew he had had an elective mastectomy and loved summer when he could take off his shirt to display a seriously hairy chest and scars, and wear shorts to display his short, fat, hairy legs. When I found him lying on a bed in the gynae ward with his receding hairline and bushy beard he told me in his newly acquired basso profundo “I’m just in for a wee hysterectomy reverend”. I really felt for all the women in the ward who were finding life distressing enough without having to deal with this. But to answer your question, a dress code sometimes is necessary even though anyone with any sense will know how to dress according to the occasion.
1 person likes this
@RasmaSandra (88929)
• Daytona Beach, Florida
5 Sep
Yup, no one would want a dress code and they'd all be protesting,
1 person likes this
@Deepizzaguy (114056)
• Lake Charles, Louisiana
5 Sep
A dress code at a concert is a good idea since people have a right to entertained themselves and not allow rotten apples to ruin the show.
1 person likes this
@LindaOHio (200670)
• United States
5 Sep
At these concerts you have to wonder if some of the audience is smoking, drinking or taking pills of some sort. That might explain their behavior. A dress code would be nice but hard to enforce.
1 person likes this
