How do u keep a good relationship with ur husband, wife, boyfriend &girlfriend?

@sechsey (1831)
Canada
January 17, 2007 4:20am CST
What do we do to try to keep a relationship together? What can we do to make it successful? Nowadays, there's lot of divorce, separation and break ups. what do u think a relationship need to avoid that?
3 people like this
25 responses
@rsp9098 (755)
• India
20 Jan 07
u r rite!the amount of divorce and break ups goes on increasing day by day!the most important things needed to mke a relationship success are 1]mutual understanding. 2]never keep secrets. 3]be open minded. 4]consider ur partner as an important person,never neglect them! 5]love each other with all ur heart! 6]adjust each other! 7]know each other's likes and dislikes!
1 person likes this
@sechsey (1831)
• Canada
24 Jan 07
All those applies on making ur relationship work well. I believe in giving time to ur partner and not neglect them. And also to love them endlessly. Showing ur love all the time would not only make him secure but it make u feel u good as well.
@sechsey (1831)
• Canada
25 Jan 07
I understand. There are also certain things or certain secrets that are just meant for you. Maybe what she meant with never keep a secret is not to hide things from him especially those that matters. But you can be right too, keep something for yourself coz at the end what's left. Some people though believe in giving 100% of themselves for love and especially in marriage.
• Philippines
24 Jan 07
id like to comment on the 'never keep secrets' part ..keeping secrets for me isnt bad in a relationship ..of course you should keep a number of things to yourself ..just like the saying goes 'dont give it all away, keep a lil bit of something for yourself' ..hehe im sori if i cant explain this is detail ..but i hope u get my point `to touch, to move, to inspire, that is the true gift of dance -bboy dLet
@astromama (1221)
• United States
25 Jan 07
besides trust, communication, honesty, forgiveness... all those things that are absolute 'musts', i say having fun together. Laughter. I know my husband and I couldn't be apart because no one has as much fun together as we do... whether it's tickle-fights or snowball wars, fierce games of scrabble or foot-fights...it's important to have silly games and lightheartedness in a marriage... after all, I'm most happy when I've laughed til my sides ache. And having those great times and annoying songs and inside jokes makes the fighting much easier to get over and deal with. Also, romance... I think it's a balance between your partner being your absolute best friend through anything, and your lover. You should always take time to turn each other on. :-)
@sechsey (1831)
• Canada
26 Jan 07
I agree with your line " It's important to have those silly games and lightheartedness in a marriage". Life can be so much easy in general when we breeze past it with optimism and a smile. Same goes in a relationships or marriage. :)
• United States
24 Jan 07
I have been married for 30 years. We are very happy. We have our ups and downs, but always work them out. I think that the best way to keep the relatioship good, is the basic communication level. Talk things out, be truthful, and always respectful..
1 person likes this
@sechsey (1831)
• Canada
24 Jan 07
It seems that communication is the most common thing that is most important in the relationships we have. Im newly married so I hope I can learn to put that in my won marriage. We try to talk things out and communicate our worries to each other as often as we can. Anyway, thanks for the reply.
@malsun (1528)
• United States
25 Jan 07
i have realized that there will be differences of opinions between a husband or wife, boyfriend or girlfriend. for any relationship to last, it is important to listen to each other. understand that the differences will be there and that they are not perfect. just make adjustments and go on.
1 person likes this
@sechsey (1831)
• Canada
26 Jan 07
That is true. You dont have to change because your partner wants you to be that way. Just understand that he or she cant do the things you want them to do or that they cant be like the way you think or act. Learn each other's difference and then compromise , right?
• Philippines
20 Jan 07
Coordination should be considered when keeping a good relationship, you see it is not a one way street. the two of you should be involved in everything that has to do with the relationship. Successful relationships are those that have mutual love, respect and honesty. If you really love each other, then I think that maturity and growth will be discovered in the relationship hence avoiding seperation, but this doesn't guarantee that there will be no gifhts. Fights are also healthy for a relationship because this is where one learns and knows what his/her partner's wants and dislikes are.
@sechsey (1831)
• Canada
21 Jan 07
Agree. It takes two to make a good relationship. Both of u should work on it. And yes, fights can be healthy for the relationship. Provided u dont do it too often that it eventually hurt the relationship. just remember to talk about it at the end.
• United States
20 Jan 07
Try to act as if you're still dating. Keep the respect and trust. Do special things once in a while. Always act like it's your last day on earth and let the person you love know he/she is loved.
1 person likes this
@sechsey (1831)
• Canada
21 Jan 07
Yep! Keep the fire burning with constant dates here and there. It doesnt mean just because ur long time boyfriend/girlfriend or married for 10 years u have to forget about the special things ur partners love.
@Darkwing (21583)
24 Jan 07
You have to be able to sit down and honestly and openly discuss things with each other... concerns, secrets, finance, likes, dislikes... anything at all really. You need to trust one another, care, share, be loyal and honest, and respect each other. This way, the relationship should thrive on respect, honesty and trust.
1 person likes this
@jenbatres (799)
• United States
18 Jan 07
We make sure to never go to bed angry. Even if we are not in the same town -- we both occasionally travel-- we make sure to resolve all disagreements. Good communication is also very important. You need to think of marriage as a liftime commitment and not think of divorce as an easy out. best of luck
1 person likes this
@sechsey (1831)
• Canada
18 Jan 07
I totally agree with u. Its like some people immediately resort to divorce because they are fighting too much or that they are unhappy. I always believe on trying a little more and more each time to resolve issues in a relationship before u give up and divorce each other.
@aelyus (634)
• Romania
20 Jan 07
I think the communication is the solution for this,you musn't lose it.If your partenet is sad or happy,doesn/t matter,you must be near him.
@aroraasr (428)
• India
17 Jan 07
You cant save a relationship one sided. Both sided efforts are required to save a relationship. If partners love each other there is no harm in forgiving each other.
@sechsey (1831)
• Canada
18 Jan 07
That's right. It takes two to work on a relationship. Communicate and Forgiving each other isnt just from one person. I know there are times its easy for us to say it here but quite difficult to actually forgive our partners though.
• Philippines
18 Jan 07
For me, time, respect, trust are the most important ingredients needed in a relationship whether it be just bf-gf or married couples. You have to make sure that even if you have busy or different schedules because of your work or for other reasons,you have to give time to your partner.Time to communicate and catch up with each other,discuss or share your problems and stories,time to simply just be with them. Trust and respect that your partner also has his/her own life(friends,family,work) and plans. I believe that if you have all these three, then the chances of a possible breakup or separation would be very small.
1 person likes this
@sechsey (1831)
• Canada
18 Jan 07
Yes, communication is a big key and time for each other. Some couples tend to get all worked up and wrapped up with their work and schedules that they forget to spend quality time with family and their partners. Tendency is the need grows and then problems start to pop up espeacially if its not well talk about together.
• Japan
20 Jan 07
i think that education such as reading up on suggestions for a happy marriage (my personal favorite is dr.phills book family first) i think it gives great advice on how to handle certain situations so that you and your partner dont enter the bad parts of relationships. Also you need to give 100% trust, respect, and devotion to one another in order to have a succesful relationship and to not end up being another divorce statistic.
1 person likes this
• United States
25 Jan 07
Arguments are a normal part of a relationship. Forgiveness plays a great part in a relationship. The will to work things out, no matter what, HAS to be there. My husband or I ever want to start over with anyone else, so that makes us try harder to keep what we have. We both were married before and know that what we have with each other is significantly better, and never want to go back to the kind of relationships that we had before. So we tough it. And forgive each other's differences!
@nrmrreddi (356)
• Germany
20 Jan 07
First of all the partners need to have trust in others and be faithful to his or her partner or lover. Lack of this is main reason behind many of the divorce these years. And definitely the love you have on them. If it starts decresaing then there is no point in a relationship. And if love starts decreasing then its definitely not a true love, its just an affection, which is fading from your life. Then that relationship has no value.
• United States
26 Jan 07
Communication!!! That's the key for us. Also, grow together. Do new things together and keep it interesting.
• United States
18 Jan 07
communication, When my husband gets home we talk for at least an hour. We talk a lot though he is my best friend! We do all the important stuff together- pay bills, kids Dr appt., any disicions are made by both of us. It is a partnership! And it is fun and full of love!! Good Luck!
1 person likes this
• United Arab Emirates
17 Jan 07
What we can do, Its depends upon mind. Everybody have different mind and culture from family, they are dealing with that.I have only one say about this, live together and love together.
1 person likes this
@ram2aug (59)
• India
25 Jan 07
if the relation is pure and you are true to it then there is no need to maintain the relationship.the intimacy level u maintain remains the key it depends upon how much close you are and howmuch you care
@stephcjh (38473)
• United States
25 Jan 07
Hi. I try to keep respect and try new things and keep an open mind. I try to still hold hands, sit by each other and go do them old things we used to love to do when we first met. My husband has already been through one nasty divorce before we met because his wife cheated on him and she ended up marrying the other guy. My husband and I both have been thru bad relationships so we have a little experience on how to try better to keep that spark alive and well burning. I think it takes alot of trust, communication and new spices in the bedroom and understanding to keep that old flame burning.
@sechsey (1831)
• Canada
25 Jan 07
Learning from experience? At least we all try not to make the same mistakes we have in the previous relationships we had. it takes alot of work too especially when u were once hurt and cheated by someone you loved and trusted. Keep up the good work on your relationship! It seems you are in the right track already. :)
• United States
25 Jan 07
We love with all our hearts unconditionally, We be honest and loyal to each other and only to each other. Have open communication and try to spend time with each other evan when there is no time Make it worth your time. A relationship strides on 4 things 1) Loyalty to one another 2) Time with yourself and on the relationship 3) Trust and honesty 4) Most of all Love
@sechsey (1831)
• Canada
25 Jan 07
Wisely said. If there is no time, at least make time. If it is totally possible, that's where being understanding to each others needs comes and communicating it the right way. Some people dont understand it when we cant give them all the time they want too.