Embarrassing Farts ...... LOL ....

Well this makes me sound really bad I guess but i will put up with the pain and hold it in until I am out of earshot of anyone else - I really can't fart in public - weird but true! There are only a few people I can pass wind in front of , my other half, kids , gran and best friend - seriously! Once my other half was on the phone and I really let rip - his friend heard it over the phone and I was mortified - yes it really was that loud! xxx

I was with a group of friends and all of a sudden, the fart came in and everybody scream who make that sound while covering their mouth and nose with their hands. I admit it is me and say there is nothing wrong with it. Before I could finish my last word, they ran away from me and I followed them, then they ran further and further. LOL. I shouted "Hey, Come Back! It is just natural reaction only!" From that incident onwards, they told me whenever I want to fart, I must go to somewhere else, finish my farting business then come back to the group. Haha.

Of course friend.I am very conscious of my quality.

Well I hate to shatter the wonderful image that I have here at mylot, but I suppose I shall share my stinky story with you all. Well.... there is no one time this is more about a period of time. I recently had a bit of a gut infection and because of that I have to say I made myself feel sick when ever I farted. My husband started taking a box of matches to bed and would light one everytime I farted and wave it around me like he was doing some sort of destinking ritual. My four year old son would cover his mouth and pretend to vomit and banned me from doing them in his room when reading him books at night. One night he even cried as he was all sleepy and I farted in his room and he got all upset and cried. My husband just laughed and said he feels like crying also when he smells them. I hope you all have a good laugh about me being smelly....just feel lucky the havnt invetd smellavision or I would have givin you all a sample.

My wife and I were in a used furniture shop one day, which was divided into about three different rooms, and being in one with no-one in, I decided to let off a quiet one(not that I can do quiet ones, lol) and it actually echoed around quite a lot more than expected. We quickly vacated the area and moved to a different section! Well, my wife did anyway, I think it was more embarrassing for her, lol!

I most embarassing fart was when i was stnading infront of a two beautiful ladies. I thought it would go be smooth and silent but then KABOOM.. it made a sound and more embarassing is it smelled bad. I just walk away as i hear the two ladies laughing at me.. Ow the shame...

I am very careful with this.But whatever you do you cannot beat it at the wrong places.I feel annoyed when it happens when my wife is around the room.I don't know.I always want to look so clean and fresh to her.

My dad's always farting, once he gave me a ride to a job interview and we checked in and sat in the corridoor, after five minutes he said he had to leave and when he went I realised he had done a stinky fart on the way out. Just then the manager came out of the office toward me to shake my hand and say hello! I got the job though.

There are a lot of farting ussues in my home. My husband farts a lot. This is mostly because he has irritable bowel syndrome. My step son alo farts a lot, in his case because his mother feeds him takeaway food nearly all the time. My step sometimes farts deliberately in public plasces just to be a nuisance. I fart occassionally, mainly when I have eaten too much cabbage or similar foods. I know there have been embarrassing farting incidents, although I can't remember a specific one.

haha! What a great conversation starter! I don't usually fart in public but there was one time when I was in junior high. I just started going to a new school and I was super shy! I had to sneeze really bad so I did but at the same time I let one loose! The kid next to me turned and looked at me and was trying not to laugh, but I think he was the only one who heard. I thought he was really cute at the time so it was very embarassing! My husband's parents don't even allow them to say the word fart...even now and they're all way in the mid 20's to mid 30's. I say it by accident in front of them sometimes, oops! :)

It happened when I was at a shopping with friends, in the restaurants/fast food plaza. I was looking the prices in a fast food but didnt buy anything ans was walking back to the table when I released a 'silent and deadly' (I just thought it was a 'silent', but I figured it was a 'deadly' when some ppl in another table began to complain about the 'horrible smell' in the air. Luckly for me my face was away from that table and I hurried to my own. A friend asked me if I was feeling well because I was holding the urge to laugh and my face was almost purple from the effort.

[b][/b]my sister brought home a date for the first time and when the family was gathered around to greet him for the first time...i was in the room and broke wind and everyone was looking uneasy and it did not get over very well..i still remember and it was not a nice memory

Fortunately, I have not farted anywhere wherein I have to change my Surname after that. I try to be very careful about it. if ever I do, I make sure Im out of reach of people. I guess I owe it to them not to their breakfast come out again from where it went in. Keep safety...

Strangely i'm embarassed doing it in public toilets but will sometimes drop them when actually out in public. In front of friends I let rip and hope to get a 10 out of 10 rating from them.

Calais....your singing? my song.............. Nothing is more rewarding then good old FAshioned BAthroom Jokes. The most embarrassing Huh??????????? Damn......I can't begin to figure that One out........ ' Happens all the time without Warning! Okay.....here goes........this is the most recent One for me.....Oh wait...... I just thought of something Better! Last FAll my husband had a Doctor's visit.......... My Son is still at that age where he has to go in the powder -room ( LOL ) w/ me. So .....I'm doin' my thing , when my Son decides to yell at me.....Mommy you Stink.......of course......the Bathroom is located ( what felt like ) the middle of the waiting room. So I Loudly thanked him ( in a most appreciative tone ) For letting me know I stink! So when I opened the Door.....of course....the receptionists , and the Nurse were chocking BAck the Tears , and Laughter......Or maybe the tears were from the Stench ( who knows ) But that pretty much Broke me from embarrassing Bathroom Moments! " Top that! I dare you !!!!!! "

Larry the Cable Guy has a bit in one of his routines about "walking farts" where you have little ones coming out with every step. LOL If you haven't heard it yet, you should. It's really funny. :D

I can't think of any truly embarassing farts at the moment...amusing ones. I think thats one think my family is very "ok" with bodily functions we dont get all embrarassed because someone farted (ok so i was brought up to say tooted or fluffed...I have a hard time saying the word "Fart" out loud) I get extremely gassy (as does my sister)when I've eaten any dairy products and I have gotten used to my family saying...before you can have this...are you going to stay long? And if i say yes...they don't let me have whatever it is...If i have it i could clear a room with just a little fluff! A time that comes to mind as vastly amusing was shopping in a little mom and pop store on the way to visit my grandma. I was looking at something and about to purchase it when my 2nd youngest sister comes boogieing up to me and says "we have to go" and i was like umm i just want to buy this and shes like no we can come back later we HAVE to go. Well I started to go to the till and smelt the stench...put down what i was going to buy and we left the store. Turned out she had farted in the one aisle and it was nasty and she was so unembarrassed by her odour she wanted to leave before others smelt it.

when your teacher in class ask you to lift that chair to transfer to the left side, as all of your classmates are all looking at you... everything is in silence... when you are starts lifting that chair... it suddenly a loud noise of farting and all of your classmates rolling on the floor laughing out loud at you because you can't deny... nyahahahahahaha

I hav 2 stories. 1st story: I was in second grade and the teacher was reading a story. The room was seriously quiet. Then with NO WARNING I farted soo loud! Luckily There were only girls there and no one laughed, but I must have blushed so much!! 2nd story: I was at a volleyball tournament. I was having breakfast. Luckily I was pretty late so there were only 2 girls left when it happened. Ok so anyways, I was cleaning up after myself when I really needed to sneeze. I sneezed so loud and just right after that I farted like the loudest fart I´ve ever farted. ":( so embarrassing!!!