I hate being told constantly."Man is the head, the woman should be submissive

well yeah thats what submissive means , basicaly , hush your mouth and do as i say , well over the top to me , cause thats always been like that , and ive never been like that towards my GF or any woman in a relatioship that ive been in , i dont know why its like that , if you ask someone why does it say that in the bible than their response would be like the next " its just like that , it is what it is "..but if my GF doesnt want to cook i dont beat her over the head with it ,i just cook for myself , i dont assume her to wash my clothes , feed me , none of that , i do for myself and thats that , if my GF cooks for me , than its outta love for me , and i too return the same favor its outta love not because i demand you to do this chore every single day of your life ...theres no love in that or speical romance ..

The first problem with this subject is, the scripture in question is directed toward a partnership between two spiritual people whose first priority is to serve the Lord. If a man (or woman) is going to consider the man as head of household, and the woman is going to be submissive to him, then, the man has to be a man of God who understands what it means to be the head. The woman, in turn has to understand her role as well. For a woman to be submissive to her husband the family must understand the natural or spiritual 'order' of a biblical family. The man, as the spiritual leader is a man who first serves God and follows scripture in every way. He esteems his wife as a 'gift' from God and puts her in a spiritual place as his help mate, lover, friend, mother of his children and so forth. She is expected to a 'Proverbial Woman'. The woman/wife, submits herself to his authority as the head or leader (under the assumption he is a spiritual man) of the family. For a woman to submit herself to her husband, a husband will in turn, have to submit himself to her. For anyone to try to understand this scripture (and any other) it will take understanding (and living by) the rest of scripture. It doesn't give any man the authority to become a dictator. Neither does it mean a woman has to give in to every whim of her husband. If a man is to become the leader of his family, then he must be a follower and doer of the Word of God. He can't just consider himself the almightly ruler and be done with it. There are responsibilities that go along with it. This is itself one of the things that is completely wrong with the distorted picture of the family that society has through the years placed on the family. Scripturally, there is a natural order of things. There is God, Jesus Christ, Man, Woman and children. That's the natural order. If a man is under the authority of God, he is naturally going to understand what it means to be the head. He is not only going to follow the 'marriage laws' that God has set forth, but he is going to follow other scriptural laws as well. In turn, (following the natural order of things), the woman is going to be under the authority of the man (given that the man is a Godly man) and together, they are going to follow the natural laws of marriage and raising a scriptural family. In a Godly marriage, there are no rules as to who does dishes and who takes out the garbage, or who swings a hammer and who changes the diapers. In a Godly marriage, each partner is equal and esteems each other as a gift from God. Each partner takes on the responsibility of doing what is necessary to develope and nurture a 'scriptural' family. One of the largest problems with any family is to take this scripture and any other scripture out of context and try to place a secular or worldly view on it. Again, if anyone is going to try to understand what this scripture (or any other) means, they are going to have to try to understand the remainder of scriptures. For any man to want you to 'submit' to his will, he is going to have to follow the natural order of things. If he expects you to follow the rules, then he must do the same. In a 'scriptural' marriage, no one takes control and no one takes a back seat. As you stated, it's a mutual understanding. However, that understanding cannot be reached if there is no God. (Of course, this is just my opinion and my understanding of what it means to be a woman, wife and mother).

LOL the day I submit to anyone let alone a man in that sort of fashion I want someone to slap me upside my head then shoot me in the face with a harpoon I'm sorry but there is NO WAY IN HELL I would EVER be some guys puppet...I wasnt born to SERVE anyone other than mydamnself ya know...My name isnt June.. SADLY I actually know a woman like this...She HAS TO wear make up to leave the house (in case someone they know sees her). She HAS TO have dinner ready and on the table when dude gets home. She HAS TO be dressed nicely, wearing make up and 5" heels, have her hair done etc when he gets home (in case he wants to "bend her over")...She HAS TO do as she is told which INCLUDES allowing him to sleep with whomever he wants and she isnt to complain or even say anything about it... and the list goes on....I went to school with her and her bf is one of my brothers best friends and I gotta tell ya...thats just messed up right there..but thats SO HIM....

i have also got similar attitude. it seems from early ages it is a tabbo in society where men are supposed to dominate and women are aslways supposed to be submissive. the cultures are chaging and also the outlooks. still i think this is not so much of change. when a person marries also, the lady is taken as she is domestic help. i ahte this attitude.

To be submisive is the womans part of the biblical teaching but the other part of the teaching is for the husband to love the wife as Christ loved the church. I think that part is much harder. Another verse talks about treating your wife with respect. The womans place is not neccesarily the kitchen. If the husband knows that you hate cooking with a passion then to make her cook to me wouldn't be loving or respecting her. I think to be submissive it probably means about bigger things, lfe altering things, like perhaps if your family should move or something for example. For that the man would have the final say but remember the husband is supposed to treat his wife with respect and love so then I think her thoughts and feelings need to be considered.

not all mylotters are christians, right? so i thank you for elaborating the topic. that makes sense in the olden times and during the time of our grandparents. women are already empowered in the 20th century. they know their rights and they know when to submit to their husbands. no one is perfect so no relationship is, most of all marriage. women in the 20th century are still affectionate as before but just wiser and stronger. for me husbands and wives are partners, not enemies, not prey and predator. they are two different beings with two different backgrounds and beliefs so it's normal for them to argue or fight over things. but hurting each other physically is a different and deeper issue. there are family counselors and family counselling, center for women and children from which we can seek help from in case of abuse. love and respect are equally essential in marriage regardless of the gender. a modern and considerate man/husband isn't afraid to invade the women's territory (the household). doing the chores doesn't make a man less masculine. nor doing some basic house repair a woman less feminine. for christians, we know the teachings but sticking to a single teaching may mean jeopardizing your rights which you are aware of. gone are the days for martyrs but it's unfair to either of the partners to be dominant at each other because each of them is even referred to as a BETTER HALF. SO WHAT ELSE COULD'VE BEEN BETTER THAN NEGOTIATING IN THE 20th CENTURY?

No one should ever be the submissive in a any relationship. Marriage - like all relationships - is 50/50 that is how it SHOULD be.

If women were suppose to do all of the house work, we wouldn't have to work. Those were different times than now and it takes two to run a home properly. There is no way in the world I would let my husband have full command. We are partners and he would agree. He is not my boss, nor am I his slave. A woman's place is not in the kitchen. My husband and I share the household chores as well as the out door chores. He cooks and cleans just as much as I do. I agree with you on this.

I can't cook worth a dang either, nor am I good at, or enjoy a lot of other "traditionao woman's work." my husband knows that if he tries to get me to submit, he'll wake up with his balls glued to his forehead!! No kidding on that one. I won't put up with that. I don't expect him to provide for me either. We each bring a modest amount to the household (he brings in a bit more than I do just because of the nature of his income), and we do our best. He takes care of certain bills, I take care of others, and we both benefit.

It is incrediably sad to me just how man has abused used and twisted the teachings of the bible to suit themselves from gneration to generation. The bible teaches of a beautiful equal partnership between a husband and a wife. God never meant for a man to hold the woman back from anything she wanted to do. As a matter of fact a man is very much responsible and accountable to God for not nuturing and encouraging his wife to follow her passions in life what ever they may be. Same for the wife to encourage her husband. They are to encourage their children. Nobody owns anybody. God said it all perfectly we as humans are the ones to interpret the message wrongly. I say get to know who God is. You get to know him and it will be much harder to misunderstand the word of God!

man is made free to think and act, but what the bible says we have to obey or we are going against almighty god.

My husband used to beat me over the head with that sumissive crap and yet wewere suppose to be partners, Partners are equal and do not have master slave relationship. Women in 2008 are ableto work and feed and clothe themselves and they marry for love and companionship notto have a sugar daddy or a master to command them around and tell them all their duties. I noticed that when my husband lose his job or later was on disabity he did not object atall to my working parttime orto using my wages for rentand food. He did do a lot of the cooking but left all the dishes for me . i hate dishwashing but that was always my job.

Well first off the understanding of this as tought today is a teaching of the arrogent Church of Rome. If it were to be read correctly first off it is telling women to be submissive (not subserbient) to their OWN husbans, in other words they only need to harken to the words of their own husban. And further more this is about spiritual and cultural maters. They are not to teach another womans husban either, All this is doing is setting up maraital boundreis protecting the wife, that the wife of one man can not be influinced by another man, and that a wife should not make herself spiritualy over another womans husband. It further says that a husband should treat his wife with respect, the weak translation from greek sateing that woman is the weaker vesal should be interpeted this way, the woman is like a 'precious' jar, meaning she should be treated as an unreplaceable precious and breakble vase. It was a male shvanistic Church of Rome that made this to mean a woman had less worth than a man, and was subserviant to man, when clearly there were women teachers and desciples of christ, there was no rule that an unmaried woman could not have any authority in the church, this only applied to maried women, and why you ask To cut down on jellousy.

I think you are confusing submissive with subserveant. Those two have different meanings and different actions. Man is the head of the house, just as Christ is the head of the church. If man doesn't uphold the responsibility that he has been given, and believe me its hard to carry that weight, he should ask God for help. When me don't seek God's guidance is where men take on the roll of master, their own faults or fears cause them to bully their way through relationships thinking they will get what they want, they do for a while but it never lasts. If you don't like to cook then seek a man who cooks and likes to, feminism has caused men to be cowards towards a strong women, and women know it. Men didn't kill chivalry, some women did when they thought they didn't need a man to make them complete, problem is, they use man to compete. I don't think any woman should stay in an abusive relationship just because the man makes her, women have their own minds but if they give in all the time men will keep taking. Seek out a relationship that allows the man to be strong and protect his family, he will comfort you for it. Don't challege him or try to reign him in, men don't want to be told they are doing something wrong when they are trying, give him the support he needs. If he's wrong and won't admit it then by all means call him on it, we are always learning but we don't always like to be taught. Marriage is a partnership yes, and "part" of the "ship" is the relationship that's formed before the "ship" ever sets sail. Remember its you two and only you two who are in this, don't allow outside influences to sway your decision. Oops! I just erased by own advice!

I am totally in agreement with your discussion. Does a woman need to be submissive to an abusive man? The answer is no. The men should be the head of the family so it was said, but are they? A husband should love, care and protect his wife and family, but does he apply this in his daily life? Probably not. So, why should a woman be submissive if a man failed to do his part? Think about logic and practical, no one wants to be a slave in their own house. There should be balance in any relationship.

I totally get where you are coming from, this is bugging me so much just lately. All this talk of marriage being of equals now, when it boils down to it that is not so. I love my hubby to bits but there are times when I feel like I am tied down within my marriage with certain things, he does not control me, but before I make a decision about something it has to be run past him. I just feel that sometimes marriage is not all it is made up to be.

Yes it says that Jesus it over man and man is over woman. Some people feel that means that Jesus talks to man and than the man relays the mesage to the woman. Which in suggsts that women cannot talk to God or Jesus. Woman to be submissive to the man, man is to love the woman. Notice it never says that the woman has to love the man. It also states that the man should treat the woman well. At one church I went to when the preacher started preaching this most women got up and "went to the bathroom". I guess most people pick and choose what parts they want to believe(whatever suits them i guess).