I am so stupid, I keep taking care of my friend and her husband because they...

NEVER be ashamed to say that you have had to go on food stamps. It isn't like you aren't trying to get a job or find some way to earn the extra money you need. YOU ARE TRYING!! My friend sits, and when there has been jobs offered to her, she refuses them. The missing part of the equation is that the lady weighs in at over 350 pounds!! I tried to get her to go on disability five years ago and she refused, figuring that she would find a job-but she never went out job hunting. Now, she has waited for two years to get on disability and is still waiting. I have discussed it with my BF, and done a bunch of soul searching the past couple of days. It is an eye opener when the friend can buy food that I can't afford. She goes to the thrift shop and impulsive buys and I have to measure my purchases in the respect of "Is it a want or a need?" I bought five pair of underwear a couple of days ago--to the tune of $8.00 and I felt guilty about it, even though I needed underwear. She also can order delivery pizza and Chinese food, which is something I couldn't afford or even dream of doing...so definitely there is a problem with the picture. They aren't eligible for food stamps in the state of California as he is on disability. She doesn't go for the cheap food or has the ability to figure out the cheaper way to live. I bought her a bread maker (used for $5 at a thrift shop) and I mentioned that she could make their own bread and use whatever she wanted in it. I was firmly told that she didn't want to take the time to put the ingredients into the bread maker...that it was too much work! I timed how long it takes to put the ingredients into the bread maker (I have one myself) and it took all of five minutes. I just reached the point of being depressed and fed up with having to hustle to make ends meet because of having a friend that keeps borrowing and then having my daughter, son in law, two grand daughters and the son in law's uncle live with me and not only increase my bills by 300%, run my car into the ground to the point that I was only able to get $800 for a $6000 car (they have come close to bankrupting me!) I have dreams and desires and definite wants of my own... and as everyone has proven to me, I do need to put a stop to the situation and think of myself for once. Please, don't be ashamed to be on food stamps. It has become such a stigma for people because of the abuse that have come to all of our attentions. You are in need of the assistance and there is no crime in that or need for shame because you need the help. I wish you lived in my area because I could probably fix you up with a part time job that pays under the table. The main thing though is keep your head high and remember that the food stamps are just a stop gap measure to keep you going until you get out of the hole. You aren't going to be on them forever and you aren't an abuser of the system. I send you a ton of hugs to help you realize that you are meant to keep your head up and feel good about yourself.