Interacial relationships!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

@jesus777 (664)
Bermuda
August 21, 2008 1:09pm CST
how would your family respond if you da5ted someone outside of your race in my case my mom told me that she would disown me and my kids if i married outside my race !!!!! but i think love goes past color and i look at a person heart and if you sincerely love someone and they sincerely love you then the color of there skin should not matter!!! but my cousin is dealing with this very issue she is black and she married a white man and her farther has disowned because of this i dont this right at all you cant help who you fall in love with to me its a matter of two hearts joining together as one in love and unity and to me skin color shoe not be an issue at all!!!!!!!!!!!!!
9 people like this
27 responses
@cbreeze (1207)
• United States
22 Aug 08
I think some people date outside of their race for the novely of it. When you hear someone say things like "I don't date this race, or that race because..." or "I only date this race or that race because...". I think they are choosing to date due to some pretty shallow reasons. Most people meet someone under whatever circumstances and just hit it off. They may spend time together because they like each other, or they may spend time together because they work together or are on a project together, but whatever the case, they discover they have a lot in common and enjoy each other's company. It has nothing to do with race. They fall for each other and it is no one elses business if they decide to date, regardless of their race. It is sad that so many people are STILL so narrow minded. It is especially sad when it is family who does this to one another.
2 people like this
@dawnald (84131)
• Shingle Springs, California
22 Aug 08
My family would have no problem with it as long as he was a good person.
1 person likes this
@moneyandgc (3430)
• United States
22 Aug 08
I am white. My husband is Mexican. My family had no reaction at all. To tell you the truth I never even thought about it when we were dating until a neighbor asked. She said, "So how does your dad feel about you being with someone who is Mexican?" I said, "I have no idea, he hasn't said anything and I haven't asked." If anyone has a problem with who I love that is their problem. I have never had a negative reaction to it though thankfully.
1 person likes this
@austere (2816)
• Philippines
22 Aug 08
well, i think, that is really very unfair. if you love someone, you dont look at the skin color of the person..nor does the physical attributes matter. loving is beyond the race, the physicality, height, weight or age.. you just feel it and for me, no word can even describe it. it's beyond words.. and your family should be the first people to should understand you and support you when that happens..
@dvmurphy (326)
• United States
22 Aug 08
My son is American Indian/Mexican and White. He grew up in a small town and believe it or not we didn't have any problems until we moved to the city. He got called War Chief, had war calls made behind his back, when he got old enough to date the girls father's would not let their daughter's go out with him. Out of highschool in went in the Army and did duty in Iraq for fourteen months. His commanding officer made remarks to him about what nationality are you. He just keep repeating I'm an American. He finally got mad and told him he was mexican/Indian. The commander saw a picture of my son's fiance who is asian mixed and in front of my son said well look at that. My son is now in China and is engaged to a beautiful Chinese girl over there. At first her parents were not to happy about a western devil being interested in there daughter. It took two years before they warmed up to him. Chinese couples can only have one child. It is the child's responsibility to take care of their parents when they become elderly. Unfortunately even today you still have problems with interracial relationships and often it is the children of the couple who suffer more. Cultural differences, differences in upbringing and background, religion and faith, language barriers, and mostly plain prejudice. It has not gone away but been a little better sugar coated.
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
22 Aug 08
Being married, that does not apply, but I would not,not because I cannot love someone of a different race, but because I do not want people to regard me as doing it for other than for love and I find those who are of my own race more attractive. Mind you in Canada, we do not have the problem of the children being classified as being of one race or another since they are considered either of a religion or of the race of the father so if a black woman married a white man who happened to be Welsh, the children would be Welsh-Canadians, not Togolese-Canadians if the mother came from Togo. But in the States it is different,since there is this horrible history of slavery of one particular race rather than slavery of people who were captured in war or could not pay their debts, and I do not like the idea of marrying someone to make a statement. Also I do believe that we fall in love who were consider handsome, or the looks that appeal to us. So if someone falls in love with someone of a different color and there are no other reasons such as trying to show they are not racists, or getting back at their parents, it really should not matter.
• Malaysia
22 Aug 08
if you truly love someone then language, culture, race, religion or any other matters, should not be an issue or barrier. i've seen and heard many people who date other people that's not the same race as them and they are happy together. But when in an inter-cultural or inter-racial relationship, the couple must know that they might face problems or that there are people who wouldn't approve of their relationship. they have to work together and stand by each other to try to overcome the problem. if they love each other, then they would not mind the obstacles that they have to go thru. but if only one of them is willing to preserve the relationship, then it could be difficult. i don't have anything against inter-cultural/racial relationship, in fact i admire those who are in that kind of relationship, and how their strength, courage and love for each other made their relationship possible.
1 person likes this
• India
22 Aug 08
Well I have give this thing a lot of thought actually. Here on mylot, religion remains one of my fav subjects and in all my responses, I have maintained that I love everybody and respect all religion and basically I am seeking spirituality more than religion itself. So long so good! Now, what if my only son were to grow up and marry somebody from a different religion…how would I react! I have really fought with myself and come to the conclusion that first and foremost its his life and so he would have every right to take such a monumental decision on his own. Secondly and regarding my acceptance, it would be wholeheartedly there as long as there is no pressure from his wife/gf towards conversion and the children are given full freedom to learn and enjoy both religions.
1 person likes this
@irishidid (8538)
• United States
22 Aug 08
A parent's love is suppose to be unconditional. They don't always have to agree, but to disown a child would be unforgivable. In my family my niece is adopted. She is also Hispanic. Her children are part black. I am one of their lily white aunts. I'm proud to call them family.
1 person likes this
@roberten (3131)
• United States
22 Aug 08
jesus777, you are right, the heart knows not color nor race but simply loves whom it loves without destinction. I was raised in a multi-cultural family and the love there was very strong. My father moved us out past the country to shield us from the narrow-minedness of our time but, as fate would have it, our home was a magnet and safe harbor for people of all color, races, religions, etc. What my parents built was wonderful and everyone wanted to share in it. It is difficult to walk a path that is unknown but as in all things you must follow it in faith. I married a second generation american of french-canadian and german heritage; me being black/white/native american, our children look like the rainbow. By the time my husband and I got married, times were changing drastically and the most opposition we received came from his family. I had one brother who did not approve but he lived with it because he loved me. He had be treated a bit worse than I as a child by those who did not approve of mixing of the races and I think he feared what I and my children would have to go through. As you see, I am still here, my husband is now deceased, and our children are beautiful in all the ways that count. None of them have families yet but I eagerly await the day when they bring their live-mates home to meet mom. Marriage has enough adversity without the "color drama", don't dwell on it too much because in the end nobody really cares. The next time you happen to be out and about among the elderly, take a very close look at all of them; no matter their color, or race, they all look pretty much the same. The biggest difference you will notice is the makeup (if they wear it). Skin color only becomes an issue if you allow it to be; it is like an argument, it takes more than one person to argue. Let is go and be at peace, life has a way of working itself out. May peace be with you.
• United States
21 Aug 08
I am white and I am with a black male so I know my family agrees
1 person likes this
@nicholejade (2430)
• Canada
21 Aug 08
I don't agree with your families views on this at all. That is quite rude and they are the wants that are being racist here and I don't like it. You cannot help who you fall in love with and that makes every interacial relationship special in its own way. I dated a Trinidadian guy and I am white. My parents as well as my family loved him dearly. The only thing that bugged them about him was his age. He was twice my age and I understand why they didn't really care for it but they still let me date him anyway.
@checapricorn (16066)
• United States
21 Aug 08
Hi, [i]I guess that is unfair..Our world is very open this time about this type of relationship and we really can't dictate our heart and whom we want to spend the rest of our life! I hope they will change their opinion about it![/i]
1 person likes this
• United States
21 Aug 08
my family didnt care that my now husband is cape verdian and we are white. that shouldnt matter. all that should matter is that you are treated well and that it it!!
1 person likes this
• Spain
21 Aug 08
My family would freak out, my family is very.....i dont even want to use the word. Although, i agree with you, skin color doesnt matter at all, we are all the same inside. and i dont see why so much controvesy on this subject...its ridiculous nowadays. everyones blood is red, and skin...is skin, who cares. love is what really is important.
• United States
21 Aug 08
I had dated men from many different races and while my parents weren't exactly jumping for joy, they never said they'd disown me either. I feel that people who are against interracial dating are very small minded people and I find it sad that they should hold such prejudices. When my daughter falls in love, I don't care what the persons ethnic background is as long as she is loved completely and respected for the wonderful person that she is. If she's happy and doing well, what more could a parent ask for? P.S. A good retort to the ones who say they'd disown you...Nobody owns me but me...you may have given birth to me and I thank you for that because you've given me the right of free will....and I can and will love whomever I choose.
• United States
21 Aug 08
Skin color is just a color, that's all to it, it should not be used to judge the character of someone, that is just wrong and very closed minded. If you love someone skin color should not be at all any part of the factors that make you love them, if you fall in love with a white man, black man, tanned man, it should not make any difference, you should only judge how they would treat you and love you. If you fall in love with a man and know that you both are meant to be, don't let your family get in the way of it, if they disown you that is their own problem and they will have to live with it for the rest of their lives for them being so selfish and race centered, why live with that kind of family anyway that won't love you for who you are and accept your decisions and lovers. That is really sad what happened to your cousin, but at least she found love in her life and that is great to have, with him the formed a family and that is the family that comes first before the parental family! Happy mylotting.
1 person likes this
@myahw20 (1116)
• Canada
21 Aug 08
First of all I really believe that love should not be ruled out by difference in race or color. As for me I am Asian and my boyfriend is Egyptian. My parents and his would of course prefer both of us to find someone our own race but in the end my parents don't really mind. they just want me to be happy and they want the man to take care of me regardless of where he came from. That is how love should be.
1 person likes this
@snowy22315 (45666)
• United States
21 Aug 08
I dont think this issue should be aproblem in today's day and age. I think that people should be with whomever they fall in love with and are comfortable with. I dont see why race should have anything to do with it. I think those relationships are slightly more prone to divorce however.
1 person likes this
22 Aug 08
I am black and have dated outside my race for quite sometime. My Dad and his parent hated it. My Mom didn't care either way. Before I married my white husband I had a long heart to heart talk withh my Dad. I explained to him that he can choose to except my marriage our choose not to be in my life at all. Needless to say my Dad walked me down the isle and gets along well with my husband. I believe that color should have no bearing on who you love, after all Love is love no matter the color.
@cbreeze (1207)
• United States
22 Aug 08
Not that his reaction was right, but your dad was probably just concerned for you. My father reacted poorly to every man I ever dated. And they were all in my race. He threatened them with violence should anything happen to me while I was dating them.