my sister hates my husband becouse he is a muslim

February 12, 2009 4:10pm CST
i am a happy married english woman to muslim and husband is wonderfully and very funny and repectfully. he is always willing to help otheres. and so he did when my sister got kick out of her boyfrinds house and the her friends house. she had no were to go. so my husband told her to say with us. rent free and he would help her move. everything was fine so it seem we told her only one rule and that was not to bring pork into the house as my husband can not eat it or anything it touch. she was fine (she hates being told what to do but this had to be done) anyway she stayed with us rent free for five months. befour christmas i was planing a family christmas dinner as my mum was to ill to make it this yeah. but asmy sister was about to move into a house she wanted it at her house. i gave in to her telling her as long as you made no pork, so my husband can come and eat also( he has christmas to)she said that would be no problem, only a week befour chirstmas i had an email telling she is going to do pork and that was it. ok i said we will come and drop the gifts off but eat with my husbands family. she ended up telling me not to come at all becouse she dose not like muslims. i felt sick by this and upset, why can she not let her raceism go, after all my husband as been so go to her, and to this day never said one bad word about her.
7 people like this
22 responses
@bird123 (10501)
• United States
28 Mar 09
No one can guaranty the actions of another.We all have our lessons we have to learn in life.It doesn't matter what everyone else does. It's what you do that counts.You and your husband give your sister nothing but love and kindness.Give it unconditionally.It's hard to hate someone loving you. She will learn the lesson in time.
1 person likes this
2 Apr 09
you have a good point there my husband is more forgiving than me at the moment but that is something i have to learn. however i will try as i have done befour. just becouse she has done this to me the it dose not mean i have to be he same.
@kerriannc (4280)
• Jamaica
13 Feb 09
I wonder if your sister was born in the month of January. My friend leave her be, she is jealous of your relationship and the only way she can lash out is to do the things that she know will hurt you both. You have sow good seeds and you will reap well. Don't have stress and heartache over her behaviour just pray for her that God will give her an heart of flesh because what she has now is a heart of stone. God bless and keep you.
1 person likes this
13 Feb 09
oh thank you we well and hopfully she will see what she did. the most importain thing is that we forgive her
@ROYALG333 (126)
• United States
13 Feb 09
Thats messed up that your sister would say that. I am sure she did not mean it and there was something else in her life that made her lash out on you. I think if she understands what she is doing by acting this way, she will apologize and grow out of it. If your happy, she should be happy for you no matter who you are with!
13 Feb 09
she i do think there is more behide it, she as always een an angery person. but also one to always have her own way.
• Canada
13 Feb 09
Maybe your sister is jelouse? As long as you are happy that is all that matters! I believe that your sisters are actually jelouse and just don't want you to be happy with him. I have a friend that is also married to a muslim and he the best guy ever! This guy is always in a happy mood, caring and always wants to play football or other kinds of spots. He is always helpful and is always there when you need him and he is an excellent cook!
1 person likes this
13 Feb 09
i know most of muslims are very fun loving and happy people is just the few that make others look bad.
@krupesh (2608)
• India
12 Feb 09
On the outset your sister is at fault.But frankly speaking you need two hands to clap.When you have given her shelter for 5 months without any rent , can she do like that? If she without any other reason has dome like that its really a shameful act on her part.
1 person likes this
12 Feb 09
Oh that is ture and it's hurt us so much the rest of my family love him and miss us at Christmas. Thankfully his family did a lovey christmas dinner for me the English why which was lovey
@spalladino (17925)
• United States
12 Feb 09
Your sister was lashing out and I doubt she really hates your husband or hates him because he's muslim. From what you posted she sounds like she's a hard person to get along with and someone who is going to have things her way regardless of the feelings of anyone else. When you refused to give in to her last minute change of plans...which was a power play on her part...and suggested an alternative, she simply hit you with whatever she could think of. Try not to be too upset by her actions. She sounds like someone who is very immature and I'm sure she'll change her tune the next time she needs something from you and your husband. When that day comes, insist on an apology and watch how fast she runs in the other direction.
1 person likes this
13 Feb 09
lol am sure she will, but we have already forgiven her. but i feel she still needs to say sorry so she knows she cant act like that.
@gracie04 (4555)
• Philippines
13 Feb 09
Your happily married and that's what matters most.. your sister doesn't have the right to act that way, i mean, she was welcomed by your hubby in your house without hesitations and yet she still hate your hubby for his religion? come on! i hope she would accept him in no time..
1 person likes this
@underdogtoo (9599)
• Philippines
12 Feb 09
She is wrong to be judging people on the basis of religion. I am sorry for this and I hope that something changes to make your relationship between your family members better. Cheers!!
@masata (408)
• Indonesia
12 Feb 09
I am not sure whether it is something to do with one's religion or not. To me, it is just strange that your sister hates muslim because of the pork. It should not be a big deal for a christian to respect the muslim's restriction in meal. Maybe there are something else that triggered her anger/emotion not to like muslim. I would advise you to have a discussion with her and clarify to her what's the problem.
1 person likes this
@koalatbs (2230)
• United States
13 Feb 09
Hi lorraine27 - My husband is Muslim also. He is a wonderful man and has always been extremely respectful. I am American and we live in the U.S. He moved here from Jordan. He is a dentist and an extremely hard worker. He treats my son, his step-son, extremely well and always has. My husband, like yours and other Muslim people, does not eat pork either. It doesn't bother me or my family. He doesn't mind if it is in our house, however, he just won't eat it. I do not buy it very often anyway. My whole family loves him and respects him. I think we've all learned that the stigma that has been given to Muslim people and those of Arabic descent does NOT apply to all. I am sorry that your sister has acted this way. I think many people feel this way towards Muslims because they are not provided with all of the facts. What they see is only what is shown to them on TV in the news. We are not provided the whole story, the whole picture & we all need to realize that.
13 Feb 09
oh that is so ture we dont have the hole story at all, and i think its our rigth to know what is going on on both sides of the story. gaza is one thing that was kept from us
@koalatbs (2230)
• United States
15 Feb 09
Yes, I guess you are right murderistic about it taking take for most people's family to get used to the idea of almost any inter-faith marriage or relationship. Luckily, my parents accepted my husband wholeheartedly without reservation. I guess I am one of the lucky ones. But, for some people the combination of both an inter-faith marriage along with the other person being Muslim can add an even more difficult dimension to the situation. I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that so many people do not know enough and it scares them. A lot of people are afraid of the "unknown" and it doesn't help that what they think they know is actually very slanted. The majority of Muslims around the world are not like what most of us see on TV. It really bothers me, as I'm sure it does you too, what I see in the media as we are only shown what they want us to see.
15 Feb 09
wow yes you are rigth, but even i was unsure about getting into a realationship with him at frist. but i was scard of the unknow that was untell i got to know him and him family alot more. they have also be very welcoming to me and like to show me of to there friends lol. what you see on t.v is far from the real thing there are the few you see on the new that give a bad name. but on t.v you also see what they want you to see.
@Harley009 (1420)
• India
26 Apr 09
You could go to your sisters house, and make them feel better and eat what are allowed for you. If your sister don't like Muslims, I can't suggest nothing, but make aware her that what Islam is.
3 Nov 09
Many people think they know what it is. Becouse what the papers say and becouse and how some people act, an say they are doing it in the name of God. They give everyone a bad name and many people belive that befour getting to know someone. It's really hard to change there minds when they have been blinded by otheir stupid people
@ajithlal (14568)
• India
2 Apr 09
No God teaches violence. No God teaches to hate. All Gods teach us is to love others and to love God. I think religion doesn't matter and God doesn't matter. It only matters is the behavior of a person and the character of the person. If a person is a good and is very helpful, it doesn't matter whatever religion he or she is and God loves that kind of person. If a person is bad and hurts others with words and deeds even if he or she is in the same religion, I don't think God likes the person, but God likes people who are good.
@annjilena (5620)
• United States
13 Feb 09
well it,s your husband and your house if she lived with you she has to respect you all house.you all was nice enough to let her live there you owe her nothing you let her live there knowing full well because you loved her.my daughter husband is muslim and they don,t eat pork but i respect there house.because i do eat pork and they know i do they just don,t prepare it for me.we get together because i love mt children and he is her husband i love him too.his ways is different from mine but i except the differents of opinions.i hope things work out for you give her time since it,s all new to her.
13 Feb 09
oh thank you evey much
@busibee (187)
• United States
13 Feb 09
First of all, I am dying to live in England! Can I come live with you?!! LOL... just kidding. Second, it is very sad that someone doesn't like somebody else just because of their religion. Religious background or ethnicity has nothing to do with a way a person is or acts. The Muslim population has been given a bad rap in the last decade because of what has been going on in the world. It is very discriminatory and sad that this is the way people still feel. I hope everything works out for you... and I hope you know NOT EVERYBODY feel the same way your sister does.
13 Feb 09
lol sure thing, it is a shame they have that rap as most of them are relly good people. it the few that lets eveyone down and i do feel sorry for the good ones that have to deal with this image now.
@youless (92269)
• Guangzhou, China
13 Feb 09
I think it's not proper for your sister to treat your husband like this. You are already a family and your husband is nice and cares about you. This is why he accepted your sister to stay with them since she had no where to go. I don't understand why your sister didn't try to appreciate to it. i respect the different religions. I think it's wrong that your sister doesn't like your husband because he is a Muslim. I am sorry to hear that.
20 Feb 09
oh thank you
@lucy02 (5017)
• United States
13 Feb 09
Frankly your sister sounds like a nut. This may be why she keeps getting kicked out of everyone's house.
20 Feb 09
i was thinking the ame thing but did not like to say lol
@Pose123 (21667)
• Canada
12 Feb 09
Hi lorraine, You are a happily married woman with a wonderful husband and it is very sad to see your sister act this way. How does the rest of your family feel about the situation? Your sister will probably change her mind as time goes by. I know it has to upset you but remember this is her problem and she is the one has to work through it. The less said the better because we cannot take back words we've already spoken, as your sister will learn. She is your sister of course, and hopefully will someday accept the fact that you are happy and that is all that matters. Blessings.
13 Feb 09
the rest of my famly love him, my mum was a little bit worred about me marring him at frist but when she got to know him, and is seeing how happy i am she loves him. they were very sad not to have us at christmas and i felt sad
1 person likes this
@adhyz82 (36263)
• Indonesia
10 Nov 09
lorraine, i hope you must be patient.maybe you and your husband had to be more patient to face and explain islam to your sister. tell her that Islam is peaceful faith and never teach their follower hate averyone.i hope i can know your husband, he must be a strong moslem. best wish from me in indonesia
• Philippines
13 Feb 09
Don't let your sister affect your relationship with your husband. You have married your husband because you love him. Love has no boundaries, no limitations. As long as you love one another don't let those obstacles affect you. You have entered a new stage of life and that is your husband and soon to be childrens. If you have one.? God bless to you!!!
@srganesh (6349)
• India
13 Feb 09
I think deep inside her,she had hatred for your husband.For the time being to come out of her difficult periods she ahd acted nice.But now the cat is out of the bag.At least you know her real face now.So,pity that girl who can't value human beings as she refused to respect other people's likes.