I love her, but she's younger than me...

@asherem2 (257)
Thailand
May 13, 2009 2:27am CST
Just recently, i have tea together with a friend. In one of our get together he shared to me something which i know is forthcoming. It's about a girl whom i know he had an eye ever since, but the problem is -the girl is younger than him...and i might say, way younger. my friend is a bachelor by the way. I also know that the girl go out with him sometimes - they have quite an interesting relationship, i might say. but my friend's dilemna is that - the girl is younger than him...he does not want that people might think odd about him. He had asked me whether he will continue the relationship or just forget it and move somewhere else. I, for one, don't know what to say: anyone, who can tell me what's the best thing for him to do?
9 people like this
34 responses
@savypat (20216)
• United States
14 May 09
Is she underage? If so he needs to wait or move on. Many good marriages are made with 10-20 years difference between the man and the woman. But he wants to be sure he doesn't break any laws with this relationship.
@applefreak (3130)
• Singapore
14 May 09
well i don't know what is the age gap like. what i know is there is no barrier in love. my partner is thirteen years older than me. is he too old for me? i don't think so. we are able to communicate and sometimes i find him a little childish too. unless your friend is in love with a girl who is still a minor, then i'd say there might be a problem. other than that, i really can't see why not? it's not easy to find someone you love you know?
@rsa101 (37968)
• Philippines
14 May 09
How much is the age difference between the two. Sometimes when the age gap is really that far you would expect to be raising some eyebrow. I think there's nothing wrong with it but they should be ready to be looked upon by other people. If they could accept that situation then they are free to engage in a relationship.
1 person likes this
@sweetyethot (1737)
• China
14 May 09
If your friend loves the girl and the girl feels the same way,why do they care about what others say?Age should not the obstacle in a good relationship.If your friend worries about this problem,then why did he date the girl?
1 person likes this
• Philippines
14 May 09
if he really has sincere and true feelings for the girl, he shouldnt let something as trivial as age get in the way. i have seen couples with their ages 10, 20 years apart and they've worked things out. it really is a matter of whether he's willing to work it out with her or not.
1 person likes this
• China
14 May 09
nothing can stop the veritable love affair,if not ,please forget it!
1 person likes this
@cyberfluf (4996)
• Netherlands
13 May 09
It really depends on how their relationship is coming along. I have had a boyfriend 6 years older than me and it did not work, I now have been together with my boyfriend for allmost 6 years and he is two years younger than me. People frown upon that sometimes as it is more common the male is older in a romantic relationship. We love each other a lot though and we are on the same level, so I don't see a problem. If people frown upon us that's their problem, it shouldn't matter if you love each other and make the relationship work. I also know stories about people having over 12 years of age difference that also worked perfectly. It all depends on how their relationship works.
@cyberfluf (4996)
• Netherlands
14 May 09
I am glad that my response helped you out, have a blessed day and happy mylotting.
@asherem2 (257)
• Thailand
14 May 09
i beleive you're perfectly right about it. That's what i have in mind actually - you take the words right out of my mouth. I guess, it does matter when you have an experience on this field huh? lol! thanks a lot. you've done me a great favor today! blessings to your relationship. (by the way double that year difference)
1 person likes this
@silverglint (2000)
• Philippines
14 May 09
If your friend is single and the girl is single, I don't think there should be anything that will hinder them from moving to the next level. Age doesn't really matter as long as two people love each other. Why should he care about what other people think? Isn't it more important that he would pursue something that will make him happy? I think he should go for it.
@jazel_juan (15747)
• Philippines
14 May 09
Actually there is nothing wrong if the girl is younger, is the girl of legal age already? that is the question there.
1 person likes this
@rich_yu (163)
• Israel
13 May 09
if you love someone you should express and tell the person its not about age and what ever. and if the girl is younger than a man its okey that if a girl older than the man thats not sound good but some people i know they are together and have a good family.so go on what you fell.
@asherem2 (257)
• Thailand
14 May 09
i might say that too..well, thanks anyway, i'd be happy to relate it to my friend. have a wonderful day!
@moujha (86)
• Mauritius
13 May 09
Love do not have age, it just happen. Well, it depend on how old the girl is, whether she is a minor or an adult. If she is an adult and your friend is older than her, i don't find any problems with that. For example, i have an uncle who has a wife who is 15years younger than him you imagine, when my uncle was 40, his wife was 25. Well, in this case, your friend should not care for the society, its his love and he should go ahead if he meet the criteria i discussed. But your friend should be sure that he truly loves the girl.well, its nice to love someone but we should know how to preserve that love, that the most important part.
@asherem2 (257)
• Thailand
14 May 09
My friend is 24years older than the girl... but they really look good with each other, for in fact my friend does not look like it - he's very strong and athletic.. they do love each other i beleive - for what will attract a young girl to an older man if not being -"in love?" and i know its not money - the girl comes from a well-to-do family. and that's another matter he had to face - lol! (whisper..."they might as well run away.."hehehe)
• Philippines
14 May 09
Hola Asherem! well.. Age doesn't matter right? As long as they're both happy and they love each other, plus if they're not hurting anyone, there's nothing to worry. Right?! Not Even the age. Actually this toic of yours caught my attention because, haha. My dad is 10 years older than my mom. See? Age doesn't matter right? Age has never been an issue for the both of them and until now they're happily married. Tell your friend that his / their happiness is much more important that what others would think about them. ^__^
• Philippines
14 May 09
Actually this TOPIC ( not toic ) and Their Happiness is much more important THAN ( not that ) would think about them. haha typing mistakes. ^__^
• United States
14 May 09
I don't see a problem with that at all. So long as your friend and this woman are happy together and can bridge the age gap, I don't think others opinions should really matter. Of course, I am a little biased. My grandparents are eleven years apart, and they've been married for almost fifty years!
1 person likes this
@rolento (227)
• Spain
13 May 09
younger, but how much younger? i'm 18 months younger than my girlfriend, but my dad is 10 years older than my stepmother, and there is no kind of problem with this, it would be different if it was a person of 35 years with a girl of 13-14 years, for example
@MsTickle (25180)
• Australia
17 May 09
Are you saying the man is 41 and the girl 14? Or are you saying the man is 41 and the girl is 20? Or are you saying the man is 35 and the girl is 20? C'mon man...we need to know their ages in order to give you our honest opinion. It's no body else's business of course but you asked!
@asherem2 (257)
• Thailand
14 May 09
what aboutif you add another five or six years to your calculations how does it sounds to you? it might be difficult right? - unless, we're on his shoes then we can understand a little bit of it. but i tell you- he loves her...
• Philippines
13 May 09
How old is your friend and how young is the girl? Well, usually people would raise eyebrows on situations like this. Since I don't know how old they both are, maybe I would just say that if they're not doing anything wrong or if they're both single, then who are we to stop them from loving each other? As long as your friend respects and loves the girl, then eventually the issue of age will die down.
@asherem2 (257)
• Thailand
14 May 09
both of them were singles of course but i tell you there's a disparity of age. anyway, thanks for your ideas. yep, i think the issue is not of age - but of love..
@eLsMarie (4346)
• Philippines
17 May 09
if he has good intentions for the girl then i don't think that there is really a problem involved... if both were mutually in love with each other, i don't find it hard for to pursue their emotions unless a lot of concern people might get hurt... besides, they are responsible for its consequences... age doesn't matter... :)
@eshanne (26)
• Malaysia
13 May 09
My words is - Just get along with her.. My wife are younger than me.. So what is the big deal, don't want people to look at you as an old person just because of her young age.. Wake up man!!! Everyone want attention dont them??? Be one.. Just like me!!! Keep it going!!
@asherem2 (257)
• Thailand
14 May 09
Woot! how i wish we can have some tea together! blessed are you - well, i'd do say keep it going too! thanks a lot, that's a knockout!
@vivianchen (2646)
• China
13 May 09
Hi Asherem, I understand your friend's concern. Because he is way oldder than the girls, he is afraid of people's opinion on him. I would say, he is overworried. Why? Love is between two people, if he really love her, he won't care about other people's thought. The only reason he cares, might be because he is not in love with her that much. But there is one thing your friend might need to know, if he decided to move forward with this relationship, he has to get ready for the difficulity to meet the girl's family. They might might not be happy to see a uncle marry their daughter. lol.. Anyway, just let them decide what they gonna to do, but once the decision was made, stick to it. Good Luck!
@asherem2 (257)
• Thailand
14 May 09
He might look like an uncle but he's quite strong for his age! lol! what he told me is that what the girl's friends might say... i guess, he's more concerned of the girl and not of himself. But, i do tell him anyway...i guess, he had to be more confident about himself. Love rules!
@tundeemma (894)
• South Africa
13 May 09
i think its a natural thing for the lady to be younegr than the man, so your relation to me is still okay and youc an go head and lover her the more not midning the age differences between the two of you
@asherem2 (257)
• Thailand
14 May 09
thanks for the encouragement - i'd tell my friend that he got lots of people in myLot rooting for him! woot! Love rules!
@ruworth (147)
13 May 09
If the girl is over 16 (UK) then there is no problem with being younger. I understand that other people may talk behine your back about it but at the end of the day everyone deserves to be happy. Take your parents for example, your dad may be about 10yrs older than your mum or vice verca but there is no problem with that is there. Age is only a number, dont let it affect your happiness.
@asherem2 (257)
• Thailand
14 May 09
worth talking to you, that's a great encouragement for him. yea, i beleive nothing must stop one's happiness...we all deserve to be happy!