Daydreamer2: What will you do if your friend fall for you?

Philippines
May 31, 2009 1:11am CST
i am finding it hard to realize when my friend falls for me and i'm kinda upset already, i still don't know what to do i am a frank person but it will hurt him whatever i will say what will i do? how can i dumped him?
5 people like this
9 responses
@sublime03 (1811)
• Philippines
31 May 09
Ive encountered this many time and indeed it is good to be honest to them. You just have to tell them that its better to stay friends instead of being together because you just want them around and hangout with them. Alot of times they get mad at first but after they realize what youve said you'll stay friends..(but for some they are hard headed and just do not want to look like an idiot thus they wont talk to you anymore or something)
2 people like this
@beamsey (427)
• Philippines
31 May 09
If I were in your position, I would just be honest and tell my friend that I think we should just stay as friends. I would tell him that I don't feel the same way. It is important to know that in situations like these, the other person will always get hurt, no matter what you say. All you can control is how you say it. Be gentle and respect whatever your friend decides to do after you tell him how you feel. If he wants to stay away from you for a while, let him do so. It will allow him to get over you and be friends with you again when he's okay already.
@CatsandDogs (13964)
• United States
31 May 09
Be honest with your feelings and tell him the truth but be gently frank but not harsh or mean but firm that you like him but not in that way and you wanted to slow things down for you were sensing something more coming from him. That way he'll back up as if to say it wasn't him or what ever he thinks and then quickly drop the subject after that, that is, as long as he doesn't try harder then you'll have to be frank and mean to get your point across. Good luck!
2 people like this
@laydee (12815)
• Philippines
31 May 09
It actually has happened. It was awkward and all because I didn't see anything special with the guy, but the fact that we're friends didn't make things a lot more easier. You see, you can't just tell the guy NO because you are afraid that the friendship would be stained and he'd be hurt. But there are times when you have to be strong in your decisions. He actually had been sending some signs and I wasn't really reciprocating any of them. In fact, I discouraged him a by my actions and words. But I guess he was just too hard headed to accept the fact. When he confessed. I was angry at myself and was trying to analyze why this friend of mine fell for me in the first place?? I knew I didn't do anything to make him feel that way, but I somehow felt I had something to do with it. I didn't like him as something who wants a relationship with me because I love someone else. He knew for a fact that we were together with my boyfriend and that we loved each other deeply. I thought that was point enough to steer him off, but sadly it didn't. I know it's harsh to say no to someone, and the worst thing you could actually do is to avoid him but I don't see how else I could make him understand that nothing shall make me change my mind. So, I'm avoiding him now. I don't know how to advise you on this, but I think it's best if you just avoid him altogether if you feel that nothing would truly develop between the two of you or something. It's harsh but talking to him would only bring out wrong signals on his part and he may feel that you're just denying the fact that you are into him too. Good luck!
1 person likes this
@acevivx (1566)
• Philippines
2 Jun 09
If he is your friend you wont just dump him just because he fell for you. It might seem to be an awkward situation but the solution is not dumping him. In my case whenever the situation occurs, what i do is treat it as a joke and not take it seriously, always letting him feel that as far as i'm concerned, I don't believe he knows what he is talking about and usually, it works because in the end he ends up seeing the humor in the situation and we go back to the easy relationship of friendship. You see, when you don't take someone seriously, it makes the person feel ridiculous in whatever he is saying or professing and he will be forced to back away. it works for me and i hope it will work for you. if not, the next best thing to do is to be very frank and straightforward and sit sown with him to discuss the situation and why it is not possible to be more than friends. but whichever way you do it, be careful that you don't really hurt his ego, otherwise, you might end up not being friends or anything else but enemies. Good luck.
@carpenter5 (6786)
• United States
1 Jun 09
I don't know but as soon as you figure it out, you need to let me know. This is happening to my son right now. His friend Lindsey, that has been good friends their whole life told me the other night that she is falling for James. I don't believe that he feels that way about her. I know he would never hurt her for the world, but I'm afraid he's going to have to.
@sanuanu (11241)
• India
31 May 09
Just do what my friend did to me. She dumped me and got separted from me. This was the best she could do so that I learn the lesson a hard way!
@ANTIQUELADY (36491)
• United States
31 May 09
I THINK DUMP HIM IS A STRONG WORD. I think i would just tell him in a nice way i didn't have feelings like that for him. Maybe y'all can still be friends. Good luck.
@bhanusb (5709)
• India
31 May 09
If he falls catch him and throw him out.And say bye bye.