I screwed up big time...HELP

@djemba (767)
India
June 23, 2009 3:26am CST
There a classmate of mine i've really liked for the last year..she's beautiful and i never really gathered enough courage to ask her out ..Since the summer vacations started ,all i could do is think of her all day..Yesterday i suddenly called her and hinted her what i felt..She didn't know how to react so i tried to change the topic and talked to her about other stuff like training and stuff and ended the call withe sweet goodnight...Later one of my best friends called and i told him what happened and he said i had done things wrong and i needed to call her back to get back to friendship talks...So i did but she didn't pickup.......ALL night yesterday i felt stupid enough to mess it all up and had a hard time going to bed..I can't stop thinking of she must be thinking.....I think i trashed myself..PLEASE HELP.....
3 people like this
19 responses
@kabudel (175)
• Philippines
23 Jun 09
Hi djemba! The truth will set you free! Tell her how you feel. Give her time to digest it. Make it clear to her what your intentions are. But you have to be ready, she might like it, she might not... If she does, then good for you! If she wants to remain as "friends", then stay, and be a friend to her. Nothing beats that. =) Good luck!
1 person likes this
@djemba (767)
• India
23 Jun 09
I already told her how i felt in that very call and it felt stupid in the end...I don't know if i can do that again clearly..
@kabudel (175)
• Philippines
23 Jun 09
no that wasn't stupid, that was brave.
@rushil92 (145)
• India
23 Jun 09
DUDE SLOW DOWN!!!!u havent done absolutely anything wrong.if ur worried about losing a friend , u wont.if u hinted towards it, so what?it is the truth right? i mean when was the last time u decided to break friendship with some1 just because she hinted liking u.if she hints back,good.if not,still good.ur jackass friend is just probably jelous.u didnt do anything wrong.u just did something u shoudve done a long time ago. cheers
@djemba (767)
• India
23 Jun 09
thanks rushil92.Its the truth and i think you're right ..I've been thinking too much and too fast ...
@HelScream (2822)
• Philippines
23 Jun 09
hey djemba how are you it's been quite some time since I last see you here well need not worry about a single thing there You have done the right thing of telling her how you feel if she wont answer our call then let it be it's not your loss at all but if she ignores you and avoid you that only means she doesnt share the same feeling as you do and all you could do is accept the fact that she is not meant for you.... If she is mature enough then she would say and try to talk to you in a couple of days just give her time to think what you have told her, thats what she need for now but if she chooses to ignore you permanently then she is not yet ready for the things you have told her the best thing you can do if this things happen is try to bring back the friendship once you have with her.. Good luck..
1 person likes this
@Amorti (200)
• Turkey
23 Jun 09
Sorry mate, you actually did wrong.. Never ever imply such stuff through phone, just be sure to be face to face to see every single reaction of her while you talk. so this way, you can know what to say, how to continue, because you can observe her attitude. take your time, let her think about it for a while, do not call back right now.Do not seem like you are hitting really hard on her, let her breathe and after a while ask her out, or at least arrange a group meeting with some other common friends of yours.
1 person likes this
@check23 (448)
• Philippines
23 Jun 09
Relax. It will be fine. You didn't do anything wrong. Maybe she was just shocked about what you told her, just give her some time and let her think of what you said. Atleast you already told her what you really feel. You did had a relief there and you let out what's bugging you inside and now this is the next step. This may take time but you must face this. You must face whatever her reaction will be even if it's good or bad.
@djemba (767)
• India
23 Jun 09
You are right ..It did kind of relax me.and for the time being, i am trying to divert my mind by mylotting and what not..Thanks check23
@check23 (448)
• Philippines
23 Jun 09
Everybody need to relax a bit even if they have the biggest problem of their life. It will make you think positive. You're welcome. =D
• India
23 Jun 09
You've done exactly the same thing I would have done mate. But you seem to have gone a little awry. Even I am a shy guy, and the girl I had a crush on eventually went away from me, nut that was due to two other reasons: 1. My friend went and told her what I felt for her. 2. She had a boy-friend. (that explained a lot) Your situation might be different. Just don't do anything in a hurry, cos that could cause a serious problem. Wait for her response. If she doesn't do anything, then just try to become her friend or something. Best of luck
1 person likes this
@subha12 (18441)
• India
24 Jun 09
you have done nothing wrong. But your friend is telling something wrong. She may be upset. try talking with her when you see her face to face. Say what you feel about her.
@silverglint (2000)
• Philippines
23 Jun 09
I think you better give the girl some time and space before you try to start all over again. This time you have to start with friendship. Sometimes, its not very believable for girls to hear that a certain guy, who never asked her out, never really got to know her, would actually have a crush on her. Hope that it will all turn on ok, we all have our "oops!" moments
@djemba (767)
• India
23 Jun 09
i can give all the time and space but i don't think she'll be keen in starting over...
@arkansos (545)
• India
24 Jun 09
wen u say hint did you mean "I love you" Or just"I think I like you" Or "I kind of like you or maybe "Good night". If you've told her you like her, its a bad idea to change the topic. Just stick to it. Plus you're 19, I am assuming so is she. So the pointless wandering around friends first doesn't work here. You told her what you feel and early which is good. Now give her time. Don't do something stupid like tell her "I was just kidding". If you take your shot back, you'll never throw it again successfully. So wait for her reply. Don't call her another day. Then ask her. Frankly, you should have asked her out , hung around before proposing. but what's done is done. Donot try to undo it
@dozhou (326)
• United States
24 Jun 09
It happened. You don't need to regret it forever. Time can solve any problem. Please give your friend enough time. Maybe you can get something unexpected.
@whizkid08 (715)
• India
23 Jun 09
Don't panic man!! Relax, you haven't done anything wrong. Speaking out your feelings isn't wrong. She didn't pick up your call because she needs time to adjust with you. Now, that she knows what you feel for her, she'll take time to "analyze" her feelings for you, whether she wants you as a friend or more. Give her time, and don't ping her again and again. Call her after some days and she'll definitely talk to you. Good luck!!
• United States
24 Jun 09
I think it would be best to talk it out. Things were awkward but it doesnt mean its over for you. You just need to sit her down and just talk. but dont come on too strong. ive been in situations like this and really the best way to deal with it is just to talk it out .
• Philippines
24 Jun 09
You should not panic with what had happened. Maybe your friend is shock or a bit shy or simply shock of what you said to her. Just give her time to recover from that moment, girls are unpredictable, who knows she likes you too but she cannot just said yes to your proposal because she's not ready yet, just give her time and i am pretty sure that your friendship will not be compromised of what you did, you just did what is right.
• United States
23 Jun 09
this answer might seem kind of strange :| but dont ask her out. if you think about it, is she friends with you? if you guys are friends then theres a reason for that. If a girl likes you, you will know and she would have asked you out instead of being friends with you. Sorry dude but the chances are that she doesnt like you as more than being friends :( If you hinted at liking her and she didnt hint back and it was an akward moment, it just wasnt meant to be. You werent stupid by calling her and hinting and didnt mess anything up.
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
23 Jun 09
Oh this isn't so bad at all. Maybe a bit awkward but all is not damaged. I think if you just tell her that you do like her and would love to take her out but if she didn't feel the same, you'd still like to be friends.....it'll all be good. Just be honest and talk to her.
@underdogtoo (9579)
• Philippines
23 Jun 09
I hope you sort yourself out soon. Cheers!!
• India
23 Jun 09
Maybe your friend needs help. There's nothing wrong in hinting I guess. DOn't worry. Such things keep happening. Just let the vacations pass and once you are back in the class, you can always change things for the better. bourne
@syankee525 (6261)
• United States
23 Jun 09
yeah slow down, next you talk to her just ask her out to a movie or something.
@PEETRE (59)
• United States
23 Jun 09
Maybe you should just call her and be honest about how you feel and ask her out. Tell her you really like her and want to go out sometime. I think honesty is the best way to go on this one.