Women: Do you like a perfect gentleman?

United States
August 7, 2009 6:26pm CST
Yes, ladies I am asking if you like a perfect gentleman? I do. I do not like it when men call me "baby" or "honey" or any other cutesy name like that. I like a man who opens a door for a woman, a man who put down the toilet seat, and who seats a woman at a restaurant. Why do I like this? Because it means that the man is trained. It means that he is respectful and if means that he knows how to treat a woman. Today, I encountered a man on myspace who called me "Baby". I chewed him out immediately because I do not let anyone get away with that. I told him that he will not speak to me or any woman like that. I do not know what men tell other men, but any self respecting woman should want a gentleman. She should not put up with a man who disrespects her or any other woman. I knew this man was young and that he had not been told how to properly talk to a woman, so I told him that the next woman he talks to he should say "Hello, how are you? My name is so-and-so and I would like to talk to you, if that is okay with you?" Women should not settle for a man who has no manners and no respect for other people.
1 person likes this
6 responses
@Stephanie5 (2947)
• United States
7 Aug 09
You are right. Women shouldn't settle...and neither should men. I like being called baby by my man. I actually prefer anything other than my name. But that's just my choice. I don't think that all men are being disrespectful when it comes to that but I certainly do know that there are quite a few out there that need to learn some manners!! There also quite a few women out there that need to too!!
• United States
8 Aug 09
Agreed. I don't like being called names like that because it makes women sound trashy. When I hear men call women "baby", I feel like it is totally disrespectful. I came from a family where women were never called "baby", we were called by our names, as it should be. Only children were called by cutesy names, but not adults. Women should also be respectful to men. Women should not call men such names either unless than man wants it, but even then, I would question what kind of self-respecting person wants that? I don't. My mother gave me my name for a reason, and thus I should be called by my name. That goes for everyone. You have a name for a reason. If a person does not know your name, then it should be "ma'am" or "sir" out of respect. I also came from a military family, and manners and respect were taught to everyone.
1 person likes this
• United States
10 Aug 09
Can my kids come live with you for about a month? lol
1 person likes this
• United States
5 Sep 09
If they came and lived with me, they would learn everything from hospital corners to the difference between a salad fork and a dinner fork. When it comes to manners, I will be very hardcore about it.
@patofgold23 (5075)
• Philippines
7 Aug 09
well it must feel so good being treated like a princess..i want that too!!!
1 person likes this
• United States
8 Aug 09
This is not being treated as a princess would be treated, but as a woman, a person should be treated. Women should be called by their real names or if their names are not known then they should be address as "ma'am". Same goes for men. You should call a man by his real name, and if you do not know it, then call him "sir". It is call respectful behavior. Something that everyone should practice. Would you, seriously, go up to a man and call him "baby" or "honey"? Why would you do that? You would go up to him and say "Hello sir, how are you?" or "Hello (insert name here), how are you?" You would do it out of respect. This goes for everyone. Treat people like people.
• United States
9 Aug 09
I got this from Yahoo, and I think that this will help women out there see what I mean about being treated like a woman should be treated: http://shine.yahoo.com/event/summerkids/5-compliments-every-woman-loves-to-hear-496071/ I really urge all women to check this out because women should know that you don't have to be royalty or special to be treated right.
• United States
25 Oct 09
oh, and rogue - I will admit that I'm one of those horrible people who can't help but to call people 'honey'... I'm not quite as bad as some of those annoying waitresses who call EVERYONE honey... but i do do it frequently. And darlin'. I work for a company that deals with many many many contractors/construction workers... so anything to sweet talk them to keep them coming back I'm game for... and the men? Well they love it of course! haha
1 person likes this
@shell2784 (752)
• United States
25 Oct 09
I like to have a gentleman as a man, to some extent. Such as, my husband opens the car door for me if he's driving ANd its crappy out... but on nice sunny days, or if I'm driving - I take care of it myself. And I don't mind that. He's never seated me in a restaraunt and I like that. I think I'd be oddly uncomfortable if he did lol. The baby thing... for sending a first email or whatever then yeah - I agree with you. But once you're comfortably in a relationship I think you might find it quite comforting... but then again, its not for everyone. I had to laugh when you said "Because it means that the man is trained". I think that's a harsh sounding way to put it. lol. I don't think it necessarily means he's trained (I bet even the best of men leave socks somewhere they're not supposed to be haha) but brought up in a lovng, respecting household. But I do like that you told that dude that he should write "hello. how are you..." I messed around with the online dating a lot and you get endless "hey baby" "hey sexy" blah blah blah. (fyi - those ones automatically got deleted. hehe)
1 person likes this
• United States
25 Oct 09
I am not saying a completely perfect gentleman because I know that that is not possible, but I am saying one that doesn't call you names that make you feel like a pet. You are a woman. I am a woman. Let's be treated like women! Let's be called by our real names, Miss, Mrs., ma'am, or madam. I know that it might now feel right at first, but it is respectful. In many cultures, men and women are address in a certain manner. In the Latino culture it is Don, Doña, Señor, Señora or Señorita because most women would be offended or shocked if you called them anything other than that. Even in Japan, mannerisms are used almost all of the time. When I was at AX I had to use mannerisms, and I felt stupid if I screwed up on a single one. I was raised in a very military family, and that was the first thing that was instilled in my brother and I were manners. My parents were firm on that.
• United States
25 Oct 09
Well... I'm only 25 so I don't really care to be called ma'am or madam by anyone! lol. I just got married (a month ago tomorrow) so Mrs. Dixon is always ablast to respond to! lol Now not so much with men... but with children, most of the ones I know call me Miss Michelle and that's from church. My 3 year old daughter refers to all of my friends as "miss laura", Miss donna, and even befoe I was dating my husband, Joslynn refered to his mom as "miss brenda". But not so much towards the men. But hey... everyone has different *standards* and *tastes* in men - and no woman should settle for anything less then they feel they deserve... so I say You go get 'em tiger! :) lol
1 person likes this
• United States
6 Nov 09
Keep chewing them out - - being a gentleman and doing the little things and respecting the big things is a dying art. People mistake it for being like a butler, but it is imopirtant to making people feel special and cared for.
• United States
7 Nov 09
Exactly, people need to feel special and cared for, and you are right, it is like a dying art. It isn't being a butler, it is just being polite.
@meggan79 (436)
• United States
30 Oct 09
My boyfriend calls me baby all the time, but I don't feel he is being disrespectful by doing it. He doesn't open the doors very much either, but I am ok with it. When it comes to the important things he is very much a gentleman. He talks to me as if I am important and everything I say is important. When I drink to much tequilla and take my clothes off in front of people, he puts them back on. Very protective in a non jealous way. I am the kind that wants to be an equal. If my hands are full you open the door, your hands are full I'll open the door. Say thank you and please, and pretend to like my cooking ;).
• United States
31 Oct 09
I guess that as long as you are okay with it, then that is what matters. Your boyfriend sounds like a nice guy. He does do a lot for you.
@amyson (3509)
• Philippines
5 Oct 09
well,yes i find a guy who is good conversant at very first place.of course he should treat like a woman or like any other girls that are easy to get.he should respect so that i will respect him too.well in my country since were mostly conservative in terms of views and culture people talk in a nice way.you can see at a first meet if the guy is gentleman or not.well if both you have now lovers it is fine to call someone that make him love and sweet.i think it is find to call your partner as honey or anything that makes both of you bond and stay together.
1 person likes this
• United States
6 Oct 09
Yes, I think that men and women should treat each other like human beings. Calling people cutesy names is terrible. This should be something that all people can agree on, but sadly most people will not. I have seen my boyfriend's mother call my boyfriend's father, and his "soon-to-be" step-father "honey" and "baby", and it sickens me. This person is your significant other! Do not degrade them by calling them cutesy little names that make them sound like pets. People aren't pets. If my boyfriend ever called me "baby" or "honey", I would surely leave him than stand for it. I have never called him cutesy names and he has never done that to me because we have way too much respect for each other.