Afraid to take my child to the doctors!
By marlena18042
@marlena18042 (636)
United States
December 14, 2009 11:13pm CST
Can you believe I feel this way! I myself think it is ridiculous, but let me tell you why.
My daughter is two and she is very clumsy, well, the typical two yr old I guess!
Anyway, it was a few months ago when I had to take my daughter to the hospital for the flu. When she got to see the doctor, he noticed that she had a couple of bruises on her legs. This was just from her jumping around and running and falling and stuff. But, he was asking her how she got them and even second guessed me, and gave me a look when I explained they were just from her being an average active two yr old!
After that day, I've worried about taking her to her appointments or to the hospital.
I am not going to avoid it of course, but it is just a shame to have to be so worried!
I can understand that the hospitals and doctors are looking out for the children because of the fact that there are people that abuse their kids, but, I think it goes to far sometimes!
Am I being paranoid? Did anyone else ever feel this way?
2 people like this
12 responses
@shonepen007 (111)
• India
15 Dec 09
Hey..Its a doctor's duty to ask you questions about your daughter or somebody else if he sees something unusual..He just want to make sure everything is ok with that person..you don't have to worry about it..If the doctor asked you about the bruises,,he cares about your daughter,,as a doctor because that is the service he is doing...You should not misinterpret it and take it the other way.Just give a good explanation of what happened as a mother..The doctor will understand..Dont be silly about this simple things..If you worry now about this simple things now..You'll worry a lot when your daughter grow up(as every mothers do)..
1 person likes this
@marlena18042 (636)
• United States
15 Dec 09
Yes, It is good for a doctor to be on point and aware. I also understand asking how they got the brusies,etc. But, when they are told how and the doctor gives a sign of disbelief, that's when it bothers me and I get offended and worried.
Thanks for your response!
@lovelyn_medrano (3070)
• Philippines
15 Dec 09
Hi marlena! I understand how you feel... Given that disbelief look is such a bad thing... Doctors care for their patients especially kids but as a mother with clean conscience, it is such a bad feeling to receive a look like that... very offensive...
Just finish the appointments and follow up check up with that doctor, then look for another pedia after...
@sagnik42 (3592)
• India
15 Dec 09
I am too young to have a kid of my own, I think 
. But I do think that you are being paranoid.
Even if the doctor suspects something, you do not have to care about that. You know what you have done (or in this case have not done) and believe in yourself. Be confident. Do not worry about such trivial issues. Your daughter will grow up and then you will have much bigger worries than this (Like my mother is worrying about my sister). Think about those rather than thinking about this.
. But I do think that you are being paranoid.
Even if the doctor suspects something, you do not have to care about that. You know what you have done (or in this case have not done) and believe in yourself. Be confident. Do not worry about such trivial issues. Your daughter will grow up and then you will have much bigger worries than this (Like my mother is worrying about my sister). Think about those rather than thinking about this.1 person likes this
@marlena18042 (636)
• United States
15 Dec 09
I suppose you are right. Worrying never helps and doesn't change a situation anyway!
Best of luck with your daughter.
@syankee525 (6261)
• United States
15 Dec 09
i think you are like being paranoid, i would still take her to the doctors and stuff. its good that the doctor is asking about the brusies. and most of the time they can tell when its not from her falling or whatever.
@starsailover (7829)
• Mexico
15 Dec 09
Hi syankee: i agree with you, doctors must be professional with these issues. It's simple, they just don't know the parents and it's their obligation to look if everything is right or not even if that makes us feel embarrased some times. Thanks for your answer. Have a nice day.
-Alvaro.
@agv0419 (3022)
• Philippines
15 Dec 09
I can relate to your daughter because I'm also very active kid when I was at her age. I have many accidents before that's why my mother is always nervous to me. It is very natural to kids to be active but in my case I'm very clumsy too that's why I had three stitches. The doctor is very suspicious I think you don't need to be guilty if you don't do anything to your daughter. Kids always telling the truth when the someone asking them.
1 person likes this
@starsailover (7829)
• Mexico
15 Dec 09
Hi marlena: I have not passed for a situation like that but i think it's important for the sake of your children that she regulary go to the doctor. The only recommendation i can give you is that you should go to an only doctor that you feel confident with and that you don't have to change the specialist on every visit. Thanks for starting this discussion. I actually feel that our society is very paranoid these days. Have a nice day.
-Alvaro
1 person likes this
@marlena18042 (636)
• United States
15 Dec 09
Yes,I will definitely take her to the doctors when needed, it is just an uncomfortable feeling.
I think some of the society may feel this way as well because of all the stories in the news where mothers and fathers have been under investigation or had their children taken by childs services only for authorities to find out later they were innocent!
And even then, they sometimes have a struggle to get the children back!
@DenverLC (1143)
• Philippines
15 Dec 09
Well you do not have a reason at all to be afraid because the doctor based on your story has all the right to react due to the fact that bruises appeared on your daughters legs. It is quite intriguing and unusual thats why. You just have to explain the cause and thats it, atleast the doctor is concerned about your own child. Be not afraid if you have not done anything bad of course.
@marlena18042 (636)
• United States
15 Dec 09
Yes, I do try to look at it from that point of view because I am sure they have helped some kids out of bad situations by being aware of such things.Thank you for your comment!
@rsa101 (37952)
• Philippines
15 Dec 09
Well I can sense your concern but, I guess you need not be afraid if you know what really happened with your daughter. I think yuo should understand too that doctors could sometimes sense to be doubtful about their patients especially the kids because they are the ones that cannot talked if their are being abused.
@schulzie (4061)
• United States
15 Dec 09
Well if I were you I would definitely take my daughter to the doctor. I mean if she is sick she needs to go to the doctor. Also, if you don't get a good "vibe" from this doctor that you have seen I would choose a new one. If you know you are not hurting your daughter and she has bruises from playing, etc. then I wouldn't worry about it. Kids get bruised sometimes from playing. Maybe the doctor you saw is used to seeing abused children or something - you never know. I would just shop around for a new doctor if that one is making you feel so uncomfortable that you are avoiding taking her for fear of being accused of such an awful thing.
Have a great day and happy myLotting!!!
Have a great day and happy myLotting!!!
@drakesuyat (1063)
• Philippines
15 Dec 09
if possible i wont! i had a very traumatizing experience one time when i brought my daughter to the hospital because she suffered from a simple wound infection. we were told that she will be needing some blood tests to figure out if she has this and that and blah blah which of course we agreed coz were afraid of what might happen to her if neglected. we told them that she is a special child and she has a smaller veins compared to other children. and they never showed any problem responding until they started doing it. imagine injecting the needle 12 times and still cant find that miracle vein where they can suck blood! my child cried from needle 1 to 12 and she almost run out of tears crying and shouting for pain! when they finally got one, i told them to get more than needed because i will never allow them to do it again should they fell short of the blood! 
@lovelyn_medrano (3070)
• Philippines
15 Dec 09
hi marlena18042! Don't be so affected with the questioning of your daughter's pediatrician... As long as your conscience is clean and you know that you are taking good care of your daughter and love her so much-- No worries... Bring her to the doctor, your daughter needs to be checked. Don't delay what is due to her. There is nothing to be ashamed of... Do what you need to do.
@allknowing (130064)
• India
15 Dec 09
The fear of expecting the unexpected does gives the jitters of the kind you are going through. But you will have to get over it and be done with it, sooner the better. Many of us have this tendency to put off going for tests fearing that we will get to see some results but the more we delay the worse the results will be.
